


Freedom in the Dark

by ElleClarke



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Light Dom/sub, Romance, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-04
Updated: 2015-11-15
Packaged: 2018-03-21 04:25:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 45,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3677382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElleClarke/pseuds/ElleClarke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was laughing.  She’d actually made the Commander laugh.  She’d never heard him laugh before.  When he spoke to her of anything outside Inquisition business, he used a gentle voice with a soft lilt that made her want to come closer.  His ‘Commander’ voice was full of power and authority.  It made her shiver in anticipation.  She wanted to run and make him chase her.  But this low husky laugh, Maker!  It made her think of waking up next to him and tickling him awake with her hair.  It made her think of stolen kisses and naughty whispers in her ear.  Evelyn found the Commander with her eyes, and yes, he was indeed laughing out loud.  In a room full of people so startled by the rich sound of it, they were all silent.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Dusk

**Author's Note:**

> The first chapter of the romance Evelyn Trevelyan and Cullen Rutherford. This had been heavily edited. All Dragon Age characters are owned by Bioware. I do take some artistic license with the story, but only around the romantic life of the Inquisitor. I expect 6 chapters, to be completed shortly.

#  Chapter One: Dusk

~oOo~

#  "They're calling her what?"  Commander Cullen Rutherford was standing with his hand resting on his sword in the Inquisition's War Room.  After the destruction and loss of life due to the Breach, most of the original inhabitants of the little village of Haven had either left or joined the Inquisition.  Leliana the Spymaster stood with her arms folded, silently regarding the war table. She was a shadow in the corner of the room.   LadyJosephine Montilyet the Chief Diplomat, waved her arms around animatedly as she spoke. She was a candle brightening her environment.

"The Herald of Andraste!"  Josephine continued gesturing excitedly.  She kept talking, but Cullen had lost interest already.  He reexamined the markers on the table.  He wished there were more.  He didn't want to allow hope to burn too brightly in his chest.  The Divine was dead, along with hundreds of others. The sky had a sickly green hole in it that sprouted smaller replicas of itself randomly, which in turn, spilled demons day and night wherever they appeared.  The Inquisition forces were small, their sphere of influence smaller.  The Spymaster was efficient, but very cool and dangerous.  He just couldn't allow himself to believe that he and a great many others wouldn't be dead in a year.  He would do what he could in the interim, but the end loomed.  How could one prisoner change anything?  He had not witnessed her closing rifts personally, and was still skeptical of this 'Mark' of hers.  He'd been told she was a mage, so perhaps any powerful mage could do it.

He looked up from the table again as Josephine finished speaking.  "Cassandra is bringing her now.  Remember, we need to convince her to agree to join the Inquisition to help us close the breach, and to add weight for the clergy and nobles."  When Cullen frowned, confused, she sighed and explained.  "If she is the Herald of Andraste, or even if the people thing she is, her image could be just what we need with the Divine gone."

"I understand."  Cullen's brow cleared.  His forte lay in military matters, not political ones.  The twists and turns of The Game gave him a headache.  The doors opened.  He saw Seeker Pendergast first, her presence a force of nature in itself.  Her plate armor gleamed in the candlelight, the scar that marked her cheek a shadow.  She was severity relieved only by the short dark hair with a braided crown, and the slight curve of her lips as she smiled at something the woman next to her had said.

The prisoner - Herald now - had taken the mountain path on her way to patch the breach and he had been leading the soldiers, so he hadn't met her yet.  She was a tall woman, dressed in obviously borrowed grey mage robes with a staff over her back.  The drabness of her clothes emphasized the rich colors of well...her. Her auburn hair was a bright sash where her braid rested over her shoulder.  She had alabaster skin dusted with a few freckles, and a mole along her her right cheekbone. She had full lips with a gentle curve, glossy and rosy. Her eyes were vibrant green, with a depth of color that he was sure would change with her mood.

Cassandra was introducing her around.  When it was his turn, he couldn’t remember a word he said to her, only that she had shaken his hand with a firm, warm, grip that had left tingles in its wake.  It had to be lyrium...or the mark...or something.

The Herald and Cassandra led the way out of the war room, Leliana and Josephine following close behind.  He stayed back, watching the four women speak, then part ways.  He felt...off.  Perhaps he was just hungry or tired.  He stopped off for a meal before he tried to sleep.

 

~oOo~

 

The Herald, Varric, Solas, and Cassandra took out of Haven the next morning for the Hinterlands and were gone for two weeks.  When the group returned, they had with them both the cleric they had been going to meet, and fine Ferelden horses complete with horse master.  The Herald reacted calmly and with unexpected humor when confronted with a near outbreak of violence between the templars and mages in front of the Chantry. Chancellor Roderick Asignon did nothing to help the situation, but  Cullen noticed that the Herald did. She had taken great pains over the next few days to speak to templars, then the mages, then slowly, templars and mages together.

If Cullen had been unsure about her being the Herald of Andraste, he no longer had any doubt.  She closed the rifts, helped the refugees, tried to make the templars and mages get along.  All miraculous things in his thinking.  She had gone to Val Royeaux and returned with a strange Elvish girl, Sera, and the First Enchanter, Vivienne.  Two more different sorts he had never expected to see together.  She had recruited one of the last Grey Wardens in Ferelden, Blackwall.  The Bull’s Chargers had joined because of her, as well as numerous agents throughout Ferelden.  As much as he was becoming comfortable with all the strange people she had been bringing in, he grew more and more uncomfortable with the Herald herself.  He just felt...off around her.

When she had returned from Val Royeaux, she had looked...different.  She had brought with her new robe patterns that fit her body in a way he had never seen before.  He had been talking to Varric outside the dwarf’s tent the first time he’d seen her new equipment.  She had a silver on green mage robe that hugged her curves in a most distracting way.  She still wore her potions belt with her magical tome bumping against her hip.  The skirt portion parted on both sides when she walked, revealing knee high leather boots and tight black leggings.  She had constructed a new staff for herself, the slight purple glow from the jewel in the end revealed the lightning trapped inside it.  

“Varric. Commander.” The Herald smiled at the men in greeting.  

“Great look, Herald.”  Varric whistled in a teasing manner.  “Dressed to impress, I see.  For anyone in particular?”  Cullen held his breath. 

“Oh, Maker! No!”  The Herald answered quickly, her cheeks going pink. “Vivienne and Josephine have been after me to make a better impression.  This is not about my trying to lure someone with my ‘wiles.’  If I even have any.” She laughed. “This is literally war paint.”  She closed her eyes and turned her face toward the sun so that they could inspect her makeup.  

Varric took a cursory look, but stepped away, slanting his eyes in the Commander’s direction.  Cullen took a deep breath, and stepped closer to inspect her face, and felt...off.  Her pale cheeks were dusted with a peachy powder.  Her lips were a deep, dark, red. The eyes were the most shocking change.  Her lashes had been darkened, and lined heavily on the top, smoky green and grey shades had been mixed for her eyelids, making her eyes look large, and...something he couldn’t put his finger on. Then she opened her eyes and smiled at him.  He jerked back from her and gripped his sword tightly.  Oh...No!  He was attracted to her.  This was bad.

“It’s different...”  Cullen said, noncommittally.  

“Oh, wait.”  The Herald dropped her smile and looked at him with hooded eyes.  “Leliana said I must cultivate an aura of mystery, so I should look at everyone like this.  Only rare, tiny smiles, and my eyes should look like I’m half asleep.”

“Uh,” Cullen felt as if he had been bashed in the chest with a shield.  He had to swallow twice before he could speak. “I’m not sure that’s the effect you...”  He pretended that someone behind the Herald was trying to get his attention.  “Excuse me, Herald.  Varric.”

The Herald watched him depart her presence with an alacrity that she clearly found slightly insulting.  She tried the look on Varric.  “Am I doing it wrong?”  She asked.

“Seems like it worked to me.”  Varric’s laughter chased Cullen as he escaped.

 

~oOo~

 

Cullen watched Evelyn ride out to Redcliffe the next day.  He had been pushing an alliance with the Templars, but she wanted to talk to the mages first.  He couldn’t blame her.  In her situation he would go with the more familiar choice as well.  

She returned almost two weeks later with an alliance with the mages.  She brought with her another mage, Dorian Pavus, from Tevinter.  Tevinter of all places.  What was with that ridiculous mustache?  It didn’t help that he looked every inch the handsome noble mage, but he knew it too.    He and the Herald had been seen together everywhere since she had returned to Haven.

Cullen finally found the Herald alone at the frozen docks one night after her return.  It was very late, and she was without her cloak.  She stood, shivering, as she stared up at the rift.  She had seemed disturbed, yet determined earlier when she had explained everything that had happened.  The time travel to the future part had boggled his mind.  That dark future had had an effect on the Herald.  One he didn’t like.

“Herald.”  Cullen greeted her.  “You seem troubled.”

“I am.”  She admitted.  “I almost wish I’d listened to you, and gone with the Templars.  They’re missing now.  Did you know that?”  She sounded angry.  “What if I could have saved them?”

“My Lady, if I may.”  Cullen couldn’t allow her to continue this line of thought.  The ‘what ifs’ that could eat away at a person’s soul could not be allowed to touch her.  “There is a technique used by templars to assist with focus.  These kinds of doubts and disturbed feelings can interfere with battle and can get you or your men killed.  This is not a healthy thing.  It’s for short term help only.  But I could show you.”

“Please...I could use some help.  If I don’t get some sleep soon, I may lose my mind.  What do I do?”  She was outlined in the combined light of the breach and the moon.  So lovely, even in all this darkness.  Cullen didn’t have to give her his outer cloak, but he did.  He didn’t have to take her hands, but he did.  He didn’t have to teach her a secret templar focusing trick, but he did.  When she’d accepted his offer of help, he knew he would do anything if she asked it of him. When she returned his cloak the next morning, it had her scent all over it. 

 

~oOo~

 

Later in the war room, Leliana and the Herald were speaking quietly and moving troop pieces on one end of the war table.  Josephine was listening and taking notes on her ever present clipboard.  How she managed to not set herself on fire or get candle wax everywhere was beyond understanding.

Cullen was focused.  He was so focused that he missed it when Josephine called an end to the meeting.  He had been working hard on not looking down the Herald’s bodice that gaped open every time she moved a marker or leaned against the table.  She was an important religious figure, whether the Chantry endorsed her or not.  He could not allow himself to feel...what he was feeling.  His cloak still carried her scent.  It was driving him to distraction. He had been forced to use tricks he hadn’t needed for a decade to keep his eyes away from that shadowy temptation.

“What is going on?” Cullen asked Josephine.  Leliana had taken the Herald into the main room of the Chantry and told her something that had the Herald stiffen her spine.

“Leliana is providing a warning.”  Josephine began writing furiously on her clipboard.  

“A warning for what?”  Cullen was worried now.  The Herald had moved to greet a young Orlesian nobleman who had arrived recently due to Josephine’s efforts to increase the Inquisition’s political influence.  

“Nothing to be concerned about, Commander.” Josephine kept writing.  “Leliana has it taken care of.”

“Maker!  Just tell me.”  Cullen demanded.  “Am I in charge of keeping Haven safe or not?” Josephine stopped writing.  She waited until the Herald and the nobleman had moved to the dining area with the other visiting dignitaries before she spoke.

“You know that right now, we need allies desperately.  We cannot afford to be too picky about whose gold we take.  While we would not knowingly ally ourselves with those who go against the ideals of the Inquisition, sometimes we have to make compromises.”  Josephine took a breath, checking to make sure no one had come into hearing range.  “The nobleman that the Herald is sharing the evening meal with has a certain...reputation that she needed to know about.”

“If it were that simple, you would not have been reluctant to tell me this.  What kind of reputation is this?  Should I get some of my people?”  Cullen did not like being handled.  Why was Josephine being so evasive?

“All right.  I’m sure that this is information that you do not really want to know, but I can see that whatever you are thinking is ten times worse than the reality.”  She looked into his eyes, seeming to plead understanding.  “Sometimes, women must...warn...other women about certain men.  You may have even heard women discussing it right in front of you.”

“No...I haven’t,” Cullen’s head spun.  Josephine spoke matter of factly. Distasteful business as usual.  She was wrong.  This was much worse than what he had been imagining.

“Usually, Commander, it starts something like, ‘Do you know about Baron Norlet?’”  The diplomat’s face held a very serious expression.  “This conversation occurs all over Thedas. Daily.”

“Daily?  Maker’s breath.”  Cullen rubbed the back of his neck.  He felt like his head was about to explode off of his shoulders.  The thought of that nobleman touching the Herald at all, let alone without her permission!  That could not happen. “We should do something...get him out of Haven.  How could you throw her to the dragons like that?”  He moved past Josephine only to be blocked before reaching the dining area by Leliana gliding into his path.  

“I can guess on what subject you and Josie have been speaking, Commander.” She placed a cool hand on his arm. “Let me reassure you that this is neither the first, nor the last time the Herald will have to deal with a handsy noble.  I realize that you are concerned.  I am not dismissing those concerns.  All women have to deal with aggressive men sooner or later.  She has heard the whisper.  She will not allow him to get her alone, unless...she wishes it.”

“You really have to have these conversations about men.  Which ones will take advantage if given the opportunity.”  Cullen felt ill.  How many times had he seen women whispering and never dreamed that they might be passing on such vital information? How many men had he known that had been predators?  

“We’re always warned about the threat in the street,” Josephine said. “But no one ever talks about the threat with gold in his pocket.  It is too difficult to prove, and they are powerful.  So we whisper.”

“I am horrified.”  Cullen peeked into the dining area and saw the Herald entertaining her guests.  She took a sip of her wine and smiled politely.  His face flushed though, at the nobleman openly staring down the Herald’s bodice.  “I feel like I should do something.”

“She doesn’t need you to come to her rescue, Commander.” Leliana released his arm now that she had seen him regain his composure.  She arched an eyebrow at him.  

“Of course.”  Cullen straightened his shoulders and cleared his throat.  “Of course she doesn’t.  She is a grown woman, and the Herald of Andraste after all. It wouldn't be at all proper to...”  He let that train of thought die before he allowed it to be fully formed.  He started for the door.  He needed to get outside.

“Commander!”  Leliana called.  Cullen paused, hand on the latch.  He didn’t turn around.  “You should be aware that we also whisper about the men who would never take advantage.  The ones that we trust.”  He did turn around then.  He looked at Leliana and saw new respect for him in her eyes.  His eyes moved to Josephine and saw the same respect there in her nod of agreement.  He realized that they had grown in his estimation as well.  Each woman was smart, driven, and stronger than she appeared.

“Leliana, Josephine.”  Cullen bowed his head to the women before he escaped into the cold night air.  He was not thrilled at this new knowledge he had gained.  But he seemed to have gotten somewhere with the other advisors.  They were building a trust that would be needed if they were to accomplish anything.  And maybe he’d be a better man for it.  He had stopped at the fire outside Varric’s tent.  He barely looked at the dwarf. He stared at the flames, unsure what to do with himself now.

“Maker, I need a drink.” He breathed. Though he had a bottle in his room inside the Chantry, Cullen would rather have been dropped naked into the Breach than go back inside there right now.  Varric contemplated Cullen for some time before he spoke.

“Come with me, Curly.”  Varric invited.  “I’m meeting some people at the tavern and you seem to have a minute free.  I’ll even buy the first round.”  Before he knew it, Cullen found himself seated in the tavern at one of the rough tables with a beer in front of him and Varric across from him.  He took a sip and immediately felt a little better.  He had never been known to drink to excess, but he certainly appreciated the relaxation a few drinks could provide.

“Hey, Jackboot!”  Sera plopped down with her ass on the table.  “Whatcha drinkin?”  She stole his beer from right in front of him, taking a deep drink before settling down like she meant to be there for a while.  

“Sera!”  Varric laughed.  “I’ll never get the Commander to relax if you keep stealing his drinks.”

“Pfffttt.  He had a sip.” Sera giggled wildly.

More drinks appeared at their table, brought by The Iron Bull and Dorian.  Cullen found Iron Bull and the Chargers to be valuable members of the Inquisition.  Even if the Bull himself had worked his way through half the women in Haven already, if the rumors were to be believed.  The way he looked at the Herald though, that was what irritated Cullen the most.  The Bull stared at her like he was having an explicit fantasy in his head, and didn’t care who knew it.  And she seemed perfectly aware of, and fine with it.

Dorian pushed another table against their occupied one and sat down next to Cullen.  Iron Bull sat on the other side, Sera stretched out her legs so that she was now taking up part of both tables.

“Here, Commander.” Dorian passed Cullen a freshly filled glass.  “Allow me to come to the rescue.”  Cullen snorted at the Tevinter’s choice of words.  If he only knew...if any of them did...

“Thank you, you’re very kind.”  Cullen did not let go of his drink this time when he rested it back on the table.  He wanted to finish this one.

“No, I’m not.  I’m an evil ’Vint Magister, remember?”  Dorian teased.

“I won’t be forgetting that any time soon.”  Iron Bull slammed his empty glass on the table and gestured to order more.  

“Drink more.  It helps. To what are we drinking?” Dorian inquired. “I ask because we have been doing it for some time now, and I don’t even know the occasion.  Not that we actually need one.”

“Killing stuff! And getting paid well to do it.”  Iron Bull suggested.

“Peaches!”  Sera picked up an unoccupied drink and made it disappear.

“Commander?” Dorian prompted. Cullen was staring deeply into his beer.

“Women.  Strong, intelligent women.”  Cullen raised his glass to a few amazing women he was lucky enough to know.

“To Women!” Varric agreed. “To the amazing creatures who know us, and put up with us anyway!” They all raised their glasses.  

 

The Herald burst into the tavern just in time to see the group put their empty glasses on the table.  She wasn’t surprised to see most of them, but Commander Cullen was a huge, if not unwelcome surprise.   Evelyn was fairly certain that he avoided her on purpose.  He had been a Templar...a Knight Commander, if she remembered right.  Maybe he had some bad experiences with mages and was uncomfortable around her because of it.  He wouldn’t be the first. Well, he couldn’t avoid her now.  He was stuck between Dorian and a supporting post.  She supposed that he could climb over or under the table to get away, but she suspected that the Commander was too polite for that.  She’d have to figure out the issue sooner or later, but not tonight.  After dealing with the handsy nobleman, she just needed a break.

“I need a drink immediately!”  She announced to the room in a slightly magically enhanced voice.  “I will not be held responsible for what will occur if I am not inebriated as soon as possible.”  The room was abruptly silent.  Evelyn realized that her joke had fallen completely flat.  This wasn’t a Circle full of people used to magic.  She sighed.  One thing couldn’t have gone easy today?

“I apologize.” She added quickly.  “I realize that to many of you that joke was not funny, and possibly even terrifying to some of you, so if you will please excuse me, I will be in the corner with people whom I hope are still my friends, having a drink...or... five.” In the silence, a miracle happened.

He was laughing.  She’d actually made the Commander laugh.  She’d never heard him laugh before.  When he spoke to her normally, he used a gentle voice with a soft lilt that made her want to come closer.  His ‘Commander’ voice was full of power and authority.  It made her shiver in anticipation.  She wanted to run and make him chase her.  But this low husky laugh. Maker!  It made her think of waking up next to him and tickling him awake with her hair.  It made her think of stolen kisses and naughty whispers in her ear.  Evelyn found the Commander with her eyes, and yes, he was indeed laughing out loud.  In a room full of people so startled by the rich sound of it, they were all silent.   Iron Bull was the first one to join him, then Sera.  Finally, the rest of the room roared with laughter.  Evelyn was so drawn to the sound of the Commander’s voice that she found herself standing next to the table he occupied without realizing how she’d even gotten there.  

“Make room for the Lady Herald!”  Iron Bull boomed, making a small space.  

“Do you expect me to squeeze in that tiny spot?  Maybe if I were tiny like Sera.”  Evelyn eyed the spot made available for her. Varric made a bit more space for her on the bench between him and Iron Bull. Evelyn squeezed in and arranged her robes before resting her elbows on the table and supporting her chin on her clasped hands.  Instantly, a bouquet of drinks appeared before her from multiple directions.

“This looks like more than five.”  She deadpanned.  She grabbed the closest two beers, then distributed the others around the table.

“The party’s over early.  What happened to your escort for the evening?”  Varric asked.  The Herald often shared meals with visiting dignitaries when she was in Haven.  She took a sip of her drink before answering.

“I may have electrified his pants.” She took another very long sip.  Maybe she could cool her quivering from hearing the Commander laugh.  That man’s voice was lethal.

“I’m sorry,” Cullen spilled his beer with a sudden movement, the amber liquid moving over the table and spilling into the straw on the floor.  “What did you say?”

“I could only put up with his creepy for so long.”  Evelyn explained.  “During the meal I politely told him that if he touched my thigh again without permission, I would electrify his balls.  And not in a good way.”  The Herald finished her first drink, settling in to take her time with the second.

“There’s a good way?”  Cullen looked mystified.  A bit terrified, really.  Then, something...else.  Curiosity?

“Oh, yes....”  Evelyn reached across the table and took one of Cullen’s gloved hands in hers.  This trick would reveal a great deal about the Commander’s feelings about magic.  She sent a light flicker of electricity against his bare wrist.  She knew from experience that this was enough to send a tingle that felt like the lightest touch over his whole body.  His amber eyes locked onto hers with an intensity she’d never expected to see from him.  She’d gotten his attention.  She released his hand and returned to her drink.  That had been an interesting response.

“That’s whatcha git for hangin’ out with stupid nobles instead of us...” Sera griped.

“I’ll bet you didn’t even get any gold out of him.” Varric said.  “Hey, you want me to steal all the stuff out of his room so he has to go home in his electrocuted pants?”

“I’ll fight my own battles, thank you.”  Evelyn smiled.  “Besides, I got plenty of gold and other support, just not from him.”

“Where did it come from then?” Varric’s eyes narrowed as he examined Evelyn’s face.  She was very pleased with herself.

“I got gold from every woman at the dinner.  Some of the men, too.  Lots of it.”  Evelyn had been pretty angry when she came looking for company and a drink.  Now she was relaxed and happy.  She had good people.  “I’d be surprised if we didn’t get more donations after the story gets around.  Sera, will your people make sure the story gets around?”

“Gotcha! Clever Herald...”  Sera purred, obviously delighted with the turn of events.  “So what’d he do?  Grab your ass?”  She laughed when Cullen’s face started to pale.

“No.  He went all out. He grabbed both my breasts like I was hiding gold in my bodice!”  The Herald laughed, tears flowing. “You should have seen the look on Baron Norlet’s face when I grabbed his crotch and sent a painful jolt of electricity through his entire body.”  The whole group laughed.

“Can I touch your titties?”  Sera rolled her head on the table to look at the Herald.  She seemed to have a great many empty glasses and bottles around her on the table. “I’m askin’ ‘cause I’m polite and shite.  No just grabby grabby...”  Evelyn shook her head, smiling.  

“No grabby grabby is right.  Thank you for asking, Sera.  All polite requests are considered.  But no...I’m going back to my cabin.  I’m more tired than I thought.”  She stood up and began to go to the door.  “Good night, everyone.”

“Shall I walk with you?”  Dorian purred. The cabin he shared with Solas was next to the one she shared with Cassandra.  “You can protect me from handsy nobles.”

“Aren’t you a handsy noble?”  She accused.

“Fair enough.”  Dorian laughed.

“I can walk you, Boss.”  Iron Bull said, looking Evelyn straight in the bosom.

“I don’t trust you...”  Evelyn teased.  

“If the Herald requires an escort to her cabin, then I will do it.”  Cullen said in his Commander voice.  Then, softer.  “If that will be agreeable to you, my Lady.” He glared at Dorian who didn’t move to let him out.

“You, I trust, Commander.”  Evelyn smiled.  Quite a few expressions crossed the Commander’s face before he settled on a warm smile.  There was a small scar on his upper lip that pulled his perfect smile slightly off center in a way that made Evelyn’s belly flutter.  Someday she’d have to build up the nerve to ask him how he got that sexy scar.

“Why him?”  Dorian complained.  “I’m just as handsome, and infinitely more charming.”

“I told you,”  Evelyn said.  “I trust him.”  Cullen must have decided that Dorian was never going to move, because he stood up, used the bench as a step, and walked right over the center of the table, avoiding Sera, using the space that Evelyn had just vacated as a step down to the floor.  He had made it look elegant and powerful.  Evelyn took a deep breath.  She hadn’t realized that she’d been holding it.

“My Lady,”  the Commander held his arm out for her to take if she wished.  He looked like every storybook prince come to life.

“Thank you, Commander.”  Evelyn gently placed her hand on his forearm and walked in the direction of her cabin.  They were a few feet from her door and just outside the light from the windows of the other cabins when he stopped.  Evelyn stopped as well, turning to face him.  He seemed to want to say something, so she followed her instincts and waited.

“Herald...it means a great deal to me that you would trust me.  Especially after...what I mean to say is...are you really all right?” She couldn’t see much of his face in the dark, but concern was obvious in his voice.  She smiled, even though he probably wouldn’t see.

“I am. Truly.  Thank you for asking.”  She saw his shoulders relax a bit.  “Was there anything else, Commander?”

“I...I think I like you better without it...”

“Without what?”  Evelyn’s eyebrows pulled together in confusion.  

“The war paint.”  He whispered.  His gloved fingertips brushed her cheek.

“Oh,” Now she understood.  He hadn’t seemed to like the makeup the first time she had worn it. That bothered her more than she wanted to examine at the moment. “Thank you again, Commander.”

“I live to serve.” The Commander’s wide shoulders were the only thing visible of him in the shadows as he bowed slightly and moved toward his room in the Chantry.

“Of course...”  Evelyn muttered as she turned to enter her chilled cabin.  The Commander is all about his duty.  Cassandra was already in bed, so she didn’t use a light as she undressed for bed.  Apparently she needn’t have bothered.  Her roommate had been waiting for her.

“Herald.”  Cassandra mumbled.  “Did all go well?”

“Yes.”  She smiled to herself.  “Some bits better than others.  But everything ended well.”  She found a cloth and got it wet at the basin.  She thought for a moment before carefully wording the question that she was afraid to ask.  “Cassandra, you’re in the military, and I have a question about military protocols.”

“I will of course try to answer any questions you have, but you should consult with Commander Cullen as well.”  The Seeker suggested.

“This was more...of a hypothetical question.”  Evelyn warmed the cloth in her hands with her magic.

“Ask.”

“What would happen if there were two soldiers who, started to have...feelings for each other?”  She tried to keep her voice steady.  

“Fraternization is strictly forbidden.  If one is the superior of the other, then consent becomes an issue due to the unequal balance of power.  But regardless, they will be separated, perhaps with loss of rank and pay.  Depends on how serious the offense is.”  Cassandra snuggled back down into the blankets.  “Isn’t it similar if mages fall in love in the Circle?  Is there a problem?”

“No, Seeker.” Evelyn said.  “I was just curious.  The mages and the templars aren’t so different are they?”  She used the cloth to remove her cosmetics, and tried not to think about the deep rumble of the Commander’s laugh.

 

~oOo~

 

All the preparations to close the breach were complete.  The mages had arrived from Redcliffe, the extra lyrium potions were distributed, and the army was ready.   Evelyn had been pleasantly surprised at how easy the breach had been to seal.  The help of the other mages had been invaluable, and she let them know it.  She had just been thinking about having her first drink when all hell broke loose.  

Evelyn’s heart pounded in fear as she watched the Red Templars coming over the fences at her.  She had sent away everyone except the three she would need to help her fight.  Haven would die that night, but if she could hold on long enough, the people will live.  And Cullen, he would see that her people were kept safe. There had been a moment when she’d been tempted to kiss him goodbye, but goodbye wasn’t how she wanted him to remember her.  She couldn’t afford to think about him right now.  Or the fact that she would probably die in the next twenty minutes. She boxxed each one of those things up and put it away in the back of her head.  The Herald of Andraste’s mind cleared.  She chose an enemy; he would be the first to die. She smiled at her companions and ran out into the fray, her magic lighting up the dark.

 

Cullen had gotten most of the Inquisition’s people out of Haven safely.  So far, at least.  Dorian, Cassandra and Varric had appeared not long after the retreat of the archdemon and the Red Templars.  There had been no sign of the Herald of Andraste.  He had people looking, but everyone was hanging by a thread, and they wouldn’t be able to look for long in the dark.

He frowned again in the direction of Haven.  He had to believe that she would come to them.  Had to believe it because with all the little miracles that the Herald had managed to work, hope had begun to grow.  He would wait.  He couldn’t bear to live without hope again.  He didn’t think the Inquisition could either.

“It has been hours.”  Cullen mumbled, stalking back to the entrance of the camp and peering into the darkness.  She had to come.  Maker, she had to come.  As he stood there, he saw some movement in the dark, then a ball of lightning shot into the air, as if to mark a location.  It had to be her!

“It’s her!  Thank the Maker!”  He called to alert the camp before he trudged out into the snow.  She wasn’t actually too far from the camp.  She had almost made it on her own.  “I’ve got you, Herald.  You’re safe now.”  

“I failed...”  She mumbled, only half conscious.  Cullen lifted her in his arms, moving as quickly as possible to the camp.  He called for a healer, placing her on the nearest open bunk.  The healers moved in, and Cullen gave them room to work.  They started immediately taking the Herald out of her wet clothing.  One went to work drying her long hair. The tent flap closed with him on the outside.  Someone had shoved him out with orders to bring in firewood to further warm the tent.

Cullen immediately barked at several people who were just standing around to bring firewood and put it immediately outside the door to the medical tent.  After he had gathered an armful of his own, he returned to the tent.  He entered quietly, moving to the small brazier that was struggling to heat the tent.  He added as much wood as he felt was safe, then his eyes found the healers.  There were four of them, two on on a side of the Herald’s bunk.  They were rubbing her arms and legs furiously to restore blood flow.  She was mumbling incoherently and shivering. Shivering was good.  It meant that her core temperature hadn’t dropped to fatal levels.  He’d seen people die in the cold.  It was a terrible thing.  He put one more stick on the fire before leaving the tent again to report on the Herald’s condition.

“What news, Commander?” Josephine asked him when he approached the large group who had been waiting just outside the tent.  

“It looks good to me, but I’m not a healer.  Dorian, can you use your fire magic to help heat the tent? Or the blankets or something?  Do you have any healing magic?”  Cullen was willing to try just about anything to get the Herald on her feet again, even ask the Tevinter.

“Of course, I know just the little trick.” The mage ducked into the tent.  “And it probably won’t set everything ablaze.”

 

Hours later, the group had dispersed.  Cullen , Josephine, and Leliana were speaking quietly around a large fire.  They looked up sharply when Dorian finally exited the tent with a smile on his face.  He sat at the fire with the others, sighing dramatically.

“She’ll be fine.”  He announced.  The others relaxed visibly.  “It was a good idea to use my fire magic to heat the blankets, Commander.  The healers were extremely grateful...I took credit, of course.  She even has all of her fingers and toes.  Counted them myself.  But you got the heroic trudge through the snow rescue. So I think we’re even.”

“I didn’t rescue her.” Cullen grumbled.  The idea of Dorian counting the Herald’s fingers and toes disturbed him greatly. “She asked for help, and I gave it.”  The strange boy, Cole suddenly appeared.  Cullen did not know what to think of him, but Evelyn seemed to have a soft spot for him.

“‘He came...I tried...and failed, he helped me.  His voice...warm...’  She’s sleeping quietly now.”  Cole whispered.  Cullen’s amber eyes met Dorian’s deep brown ones over the fire.   

“Well, isn’t that interesting.”  Leliana said almost to herself. Everyone seemed startled by what the strange young man had said.  “What other little tidbits do you have hidden in there, Cole?”

“Roderick is sorry.  He was afraid.  He’s dead now.”  Cole said.

“Well, shit.”  Dorian whispered.

 

Later,  Evelyn woke to the sound of voices arguing.  She kept her eyes closed and just listened for a while.  She was alive.  Everything ached.  She was totally going to start working out.  Tomorrow.  She had trudged through the snow until her body had ceased to function.  At that moment, when she could no longer order her body to move, she had used the last of her will to send up a ball of lightning calling for help.  What had happened after that, she didn’t know.   She’d had an interesting dream though.  

Commander Cullen had come for her.  His arms had been so warm. He had brought his broad shoulders and strong arms to save her life. It had been a nice dream.  Evelyn opened her eyes and found herself looking at Mother Giselle, the cleric from the Hinterlands.  Evelyn started to sit up.

“Shhh...you need rest.”  The cleric tried to stop her from getting up, but Evelyn waved her away.  As she got dressed, Mother Giselle informed her of everything that had happened since the evacuation of Haven.  Things weren’t looking good for them.  That was certainly nothing new.  Evelyn left the medical tent and approached the large central fire.  

Mother Giselle started singing the chant.  Soon, the entire camp was singing.  As it ended, the people came to her, some kneeling, some standing.  Evelyn was at first confused, then she realized.  This was what being The Herald of Andraste meant.  This was about these people being terrified, and them believing that she could save them.  She wasn’t about to crush that tiny flicker of hope.  As she tried to offer what comfort she could, she prayed to the Maker for guidance herself.  She felt just as lost as they were.

  
  


Cullen’s heart stuttered in his chest when the Herald stepped out of the medical tent.  She looked tired, but like she would recover.  Her clothes had been dried.  She hadn’t put her hair up yet, leaving it in a wavy red mass down her back.  She had come back to them, and now she was comforting the people of the Inquisition.  She was everything they needed her to be and more.  Their eyes met, and he took a step toward her.  She smiled at him and there was joy in it.  

Solas tapped her on the shoulder, whispering in her ear, and drew the Herald away.  Cullen saw that the elf had his hand at her back.  She was listening intently as they disappeared into the darkness at the edge of the camp.  He resisted the urge to follow.  He had no claim on her.  Dorian strolled up to the central fire, warming his hands.  Varric had a group of rapt listeners on one side, who were listening to him tell how the Herald had stood up to the ancient Tevinter Magister in all her fiercely beautiful glory.

“Such a dark expression, Commander.”  Dorian teased.  “Did someone put a snowball down your back?”  Cullen glared at the mage.  What had that Cole said?  He wondered who ‘he’ was.  It had sounded like someone’s most intimate thoughts.  Unnerving.  He relaxed his expression by sheer force of will and joined the other man by the fire.

“I was contemplating all of our options...”  Cullen said.

“Which are?”  Dorian prompted.

“Very few.”  Cullen said gloomily.  He stared hard into the fire to keep from staring hard at the spot where the Herald had gone.  Thankfully, Dorian fell silent and left him to his thoughts.

After only a few minutes, the Herald approached them with an ecstatic expression on her face.  Cullen held his breath.  Maker, what had the elf told her?

“Commander!”  She called.  “Solas knows of somewhere we can go!  We’re not lost anymore!”  He stood just in time to catch her by the arms as she skidded in the snow in her haste to reach him.  She was breathless now. The skid had brought her hard up against his armor.  She fisted her hands in the fur over his shoulders.  She was close enough that he felt her breath over his chin.  The effect was astounding.  Her lips...  “I know what to do!”

 

~oOo~


	2. Nightfall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And then his day went from bad to worse. Someone brought them more drinks. The Inquisitor picked up a glass that looked like it had fruit in it, and settled herself comfortably between leaning on Bull, and resting her legs on Dorian’s lap. She began sliding bits of wine soaked fruit up the edge of the glass, catching them on the tip of her tongue. She carefully maneuvered the fruit into her mouth, not spilling a drop. Maker help him...he couldn’t help thinking about things she might do with those lips.  
> “You’ve got a talented tongue Inquisitor.” The Bull rumbled. Cullen was upset that the Qunari’s thoughts had mirrored his own so perfectly.  
> “So very talented...” She agreed with a tipsy smile. “And so wasted lately...so tragic.”  
> “You torture me so!” Dorian teased. She had just grinned. Cullen left shortly after that. His moment with her was broken, and he didn’t wish to watch Evelyn have one with someone else.

 

Chapter Two: Nightfall

 

~oOo~

 

The trip to Skyhold took two days, with all the injured and supplies.  It took a great deal of work to get it habitable. Everyone contributed, more people arrived, and shortly, the Inquisition was up and functioning again.  Cullen had been working so hard that he hadn’t seen the Herald since the day she had been named Inquisitor.  Today was the first time that she had called the advisors together since their arrival.  He was anxious as he waited just inside the war room.   The night after Haven when she had run into his arms had been a miracle. Cullen would take out that memory in the quiet of the night and examine it from every angle.  The joy on her face as she ran to him, the feel of her in his arms.  The puff of her breath on his chin, then his lips as he tipped his head to look down into her face.  There had been a moment, when she had licked her lips and her gaze had dropped to his mouth.  He was sure that she had thought about kissing him.  He certainly had been thinking about kissing her.  

Sometimes when he was alone, he wondered what might have happened if he’d followed through on that thought.  What would her lips have felt like?  How would she have responded?  Slowly at first?  Would she tease? He was completely lost in this fantasy when the rest of the advisors and the Inquisitor entered the room.  He focused quickly on the maps, a secret smile on his lips.  Leliana silently moved to the war table.  Josephine and the Inquisitor were mid conversation.

“-surprised when you crossed sleeping gowns off the textiles order.  Your chambermaid said that you sleep in a shirt?”  Josephine glided into the room, making notes on her clipboard.

“Oh, I don’t like all that fluffy stuff to sleep in.”  The Inquisitor smiled.  “I’ll never use them, so let’s not waste the gold on them.” Cullen tried not to think about what she slept in.  A kiss was one thing, wondering what the woman who had been sent by the Maker to save them wore to sleep in was more than the former templar could take.  Too late.  Did the shirts have buttons or laces?

“That reminds me, Josephine.  Could you add a few shirts to that order for me? I lost my favorite one in the evacuation.”  Cullen said in an effort to bring his thoughts under control.  “Also, I send my laundry out, and my shirts seem to take twice as long to return as everything else.  I’m running out of clean shirts before they get back.” The room became silent.  He looked up at the women.  “What?”  

“You’re not getting your shirts back?”  Leliana’s voice held a hint of amusement.  Josephine scribbled furiously on her clipboard.

“I get them back eventually.”  He frowned.  “I do not wish to overwork the servants or get anyone in trouble.  So I thought I would just get a few more...shirts.”

“Oh, Maker...”  the Herald gasped as she knocked several of the troop pieces onto the floor.  “Don’t worry, I’ve got it.”  She dropped to her knees to grab the rolling pieces.

“Did I say something wrong?”  Cullen was thoroughly confused.  

“Of course not, Commander.”  Josephine smiled. “I’ll order you several shirts to replace the one you lost, as well as to cover any...hm...lag in the the laundry process.  Not a problem.”  

Cullen felt as if there had been subtext in that conversation that he’d missed.  How had he ended up being the only male advisor?  Luckily, they managed to make quite a few decisions with a minimum of fuss after that.  As soon as the meeting was over he escaped as fast as he could.

 

~oOo~

 

Several weeks later, Cullen was in his office when his second in command, Knight-Captain Rylen appeared.  The expression he had on his face gave Cullen pause.

“What is it? Captain Rylen?  You look like someone spit in your breakfast.”  Cullen wondered if Sera had pulled a prank on him.  She was known for some interesting stunts.  She’d brought him some cake a few times, and he still wasn’t sure if she was being kind, or messing with his head.  Good cake though.  Blueberries with lemon.

“Commander, we have a...small problem.”  Rylen was fiddling with a strap on his gauntlet.  “You will recall that you ordered me to see to the Inquisitor’s request regarding training for battle with the Red Templars?”  Cullen nodded.  The Inquisitor had found fighting against the Red Templars at the Battle of Haven had been more difficult than she felt that it should have been.  She had been concerned about their templar abilities, and wanted to practice against some of the Inquisition’s templars.  

“I’ve heard she has been doing well.”  Cullen had asked Rylen to assign someone.

“She’s doing very well, Commander. That is the source of the problem.”  He took a breath.  “She has bested all of the veterans one on one, including myself.”

“While that is impressive, I still don’t understand the problem.”  Cullen was quite impressed, in fact.  She must have a natural talent for combat if she had been able to learn to defeat his best soldiers in such a short time.  “Just assign them as teams.”

“I did that, Ser.”  Rylen said.  “She bested them in pairs as well.  Yesterday, she injured two of the men.  I have had a few of them come to me and ask not to be assigned to spar with her.  Though they are happy to assist with anything else she might require..”  Cullen was shocked.  Asked not to spar with her?  If they were they taking it easy on her, that could lead to overconfidence that could get her killed.

“You’re joking!”  He stood up and rounded his desk.    There was something very wrong here.  “She only came out of the circle a few years ago!  She should not be this skilled.”

“She told me that she practiced daily when she was in the circle, Ser.”  Rylen said.  “The Herald is not afraid of her magic like some mages.  She is extremely skilled with lightning magic.  Her barriers are strong.  And she showed up today with some new skills.”

“What new skills?”  Cullen had heard about the Inquisitor undergoing some special training, but didn’t know the particulars.  Josephine had arranged for some experts to come to Skyhold.

“Commander, she has become a Knight Enchanter.  Like Lady Vivienne.  She wants to practice with her spirit blade today.”  Rylen took a deep breath.  “She wants to practice being the front line fighter.  I am requesting your permission to continue her training versus three templars.”

“You want to send her up against three veteran templars?”  Cullen was having a hard time wrapping his mind around this.  “I’ll have to come evaluate her skills myself.  It’s about time I saw her fight.”  He gestured for Rylen to follow him to the training area.  Front line?  He wondered why she would suddenly want to change from the typical mage ranged attacks.  It was so much more dangerous.  That was the role of her warriors.

“Commander,”  Rylen choked out.  “Am I to understand you haven’t seen the Inquisitor fight?  Not in battle or in the ring?”  His face indicated his surprise.

“Not personally, Knight-Captain,”  Cullen was even more confused now.  “What is it?  She’s a mage.  I’ve seen more mages in battle than I care to think about.  You have as well.  She can’t be that impressive.”

“Of course, Ser.”  Rylen smiled.

There was chatter in the training area when they arrived.  Two templars were approaching the Inquisitor.  She held her staff in one hand, and in the other was a spirit sword blade hilt.  Cullen and Rylen made their way to the front.

The templars both had swords and shields and were wearing full plate.  The Inquisitor had taken off her green outer robes and draped them over the fence.  That left her in a white undershirt and black leggings.  She had started wearing her hair in a high ponytail while around Skyhold.  Cullen had found himself wishing to touch it, watching it play around her shoulders.  As if that weren’t enough on it’s own, she twisted the length of the auburn hair around her fingers absently, creating a ringlet effect.  It bounced.  It was...distracting.

No one said anything as the Inquisitor erupted into a flurry of motion.  She set a magical barrier around herself, and the next instant she attacked with her first spell.  The lightning shot from her staff, hitting the first templar, then bouncing to the second.  Both men were still shaking from the force of the spell when she moved in close.  She spun around in a circle, activating her blade, slashing at the templars twice before they were recovered enough to hit her.  The fight was short.  The Inquisitor’s spirit blade cut through the guard of the templars, and they never got through her barriers.  Her opponents yielded.  She stepped back, bowing to the templars.  The templars returned the gesture, then turned to accept the good natured teasing of their companions.  Cullen’s stunned face met Rylen’s smirking one.

“Lady Inquisitor!” Knight-Captain Rylen called.  She came over to where he stood at the fence.  “Nice win, my Lady.”

 

Evelyn was surprised to find Commander Cullen waiting with Knight-Captain Rylen at the edge of the training area.  She looked him over as she approached.  The Commander’s golden hair caught the light in a way that made her belly flutter.  The way he owned the space he was in spoke of a confidence that few men could claim.  His men both admired and respected their Commander, it was obvious in the way they behaved towards him.

“Commander, Knight-Captain...”  She greeted them with what she hoped was a casual smile.  She was glad that she hadn’t known they were there earlier.  It would have made her nervous.  She didn’t want to stop this training yet.  She was afraid that they were here to do just that.

“Inquisitor.”  The Commander’s voice rolled over her and down her spine.  Evelyn resisted the urge to close her eyes and just revel in the sound of it caressing her ears.  “That was a very impressive display. I have heard only good things about your progress.”

“Thank you, Commander.”  She blushed under his praise.  She hoped that with the combination of the sun and the exertion he wouldn’t notice how much it had affected her.  It was scary that his approval makes her feel so delighted.  “You have good people.  They’ve been very helpful.”

“I understand that Knight-Captain Rylen is having trouble finding a challenge for you.”  The Commander’s gaze ran over her, from head to toe.  It made her tingle with awareness, but she was sure he was looking for injuries.  He was just too much The Commander for anything else.

“Perhaps you can give the Inquisitor a challenge, Commander.”  Rylen suggested quite loudly.  It didn’t take long for the rest of the observers to begin calling for a bout between Evelyn and the Commander.  He looked like he would refuse at first, so she was surprised when he stepped through the bars of the fence and joined her on the inside of the sparring ring.  He leaned down and whispered in her ear.

“This will be good for morale, my Lady.” The former templar’s breath caressed her ear, sending shivers down her spine.  She tried hard to suppress the shudder.  “Also, they would never leave us alone.”  He smiled down at her, the scar on his lip tugging slightly in a very sexy way.  She found herself nodding.  People scattered to pass the news as they both withdrew to their own side of the arena.  

Evelyn saw the templars gather around Cullen, offering advice, and good natured teasing.  She found all of her other friends and advisors on her side.  The news had traveled quickly.  The area was filling up fast.  She rested her staff against the railing as she greeted everyone.

“I don’t know if this is a good idea.”  Josephine hedged.

“Oh relax, Josie.”  Leliana’s lips had a tiny curl as she surveyed the scene.  “This will improve morale.  Think about the gold this will bring in.”

“Think about it, Ruffles.”  Varric chimed in. “The brave and beautiful Herald of Andraste faces off in the sparring ring against the dashing and dangerous Commander of Inquisition Forces.  Mage and former templar.  Classic.  It practically writes itself.”  Evelyn covered her face with her hands and turned away from the group.  There was no way she could look at any of them right now, and it was too late to back out.  Why had she agreed to this?  Oh, right, Cullen had smiled at her.  Pushover!

“Maker, Varric!”  Evelyn said through her hands.  “Please don’t say that where he could hear you!  Or ever.”  The laughter of her friends was practically a living thing.  

“Ready, Inquisitor?”  The Commander called from his side of the ring.  He sounded...eager.  Evelyn groaned.  She had to suck this up.  She took a deep breath, turned around, and dropped her hands from her face.

“Ready and waiting, Commander.”  She called in a warm tone.  She grabbed her staff and cast a barrier spell over herself.  She turned to spot her opponent and nearly lost her concentration.  Unlike her other opponents who had used swords and shields, he had opted to use one giant two handed sword.  He was going for speed with a two handed weapon like Bull did, so he had removed his chestplate and fuzzy mantle, leaving him in black leather pants and a white shirt.  

A shirt just like the ones she slept in.  In fact, she probably had slept in that very shirt.  The Commander had lent her his sleeping space that first night out of Haven, and she had borrowed one of his shirts to sleep in.  It had reminded her of the night when he had loaned her his cloak. She’d worn it to sleep in that night, returning his cloak reluctantly. She hadn’t given back his shirt. She had found that she rested well while wearing it.  At least until it had stopped smelling like him.   Her chambermaid, Melissa, had noticed that she had started losing sleep, and had come up with an idea.  Melissa did his laundry as well as Evelyn’s.  She slept in one of his shirts, then put it back into the laundry to get cleaned and returned to him.  She had practically died of embarrassment when he had noticed the delay a while back.  She was in so much trouble.  She had always found templars an attractive temptation, and Cullen was so much more than just a templar.

“Kick his arse!”  Sera screamed.  The crowd cheered enthusiastically.  The show had begun.

The Commander was coming at her fast.  Evelyn threw a ball of lightning at him to slow him down, but the former templar shrugged it off, her magic had no effect at all.  Her barrier held when he hit it with a test swing, but it wouldn’t for long if she tried to go toe to toe with him.  She used her magic to step partially into the fade.  This allowed her to slip some distance behind her opponent.  He caught her left hand as she passed with the pommel of his weapon, causing her to lose her grip on her spirit blade.  He had just partially disarmed her, and her wrist was numb from the blow.  It would probably be useless for the rest of the fight.  It had been foolish of her to try to used untested skills against such a seasoned soldier.

“Ah...” Evelyn’s wrist, what she could feel of it, hurt.  It was fortunate that she’d been halfway into the fade at the time, or that strike would have broken her wrist. The Commander was untouched and looked...predatory.

He grinned, then began stalking her.  He swung the sword in a big circle beside him, approaching slowly.  She didn’t have to touch him, but he had to reach her.  She immediately began casting spells as fast as she could, one after another.  Large balls of lightning, groups of small lightning balls, lightning straight from the sky.

While her mana pool recovered, she used her staff.  She flowed like electricity dancing across the sky, a blast from her staff for each step or twirl as she worked her way around the arena, keeping her opponent at arm's length.  This was a challenge, this was what she had been needing, a chance to go all out.  She felt joy in her magic, the energy rising in her body to sharpen her movements, heal her body, and empower her spells.  Her barrier arced with lightning to stun incoming opponents.  It was stronger and would decay more slowly.  

She fell into a rhythm with her opponent of attack and retreat that continued for what felt like forever.  Gradually she became aware that she wouldn’t be able to hold out like this, and beat him down from afar as she had all of his soldiers. She would have to try something else.  She danced closer, lightning all around her.  The soldier came in for a big hit that she allowed through.  He jolted from the intense electrical charge that hadn’t been on her barrier before.  

Evelyn swung her staff at his knees, taking the Commander to the ground.  She huffed in surprise as he used his templar abilities to suppress her magic.  Her barrier exploded.  He kicked her feet out from under her and she was on the ground too, her staff clattering away.  She could cast without it, but her spells would be weaker without the focus.   They both struggled to their feet.  She found that her opponent had been disarmed as well.  His huge sword was far out of his reach.  Now it was just her and the Commander, both unarmed. Mostly.

“Do you yield, Herald?”  He taunted her.  If only he’d ask that when they were alone.  The templars cheered their leader.  None of them had ever been able to disarm her.   His alpha male behavior was something she’d never seen from him before.  Her body wanted to switch from battle ready tight, to loose and sexy.  That would be very bad at the moment.

“You’d like that wouldn’t you?”  She purred.  She started to build an electric charge in her right hand as they circled each other, her left was still useless.  Now she had to provoke him into being reckless.  “Commander Cullen’s conquest?”  She laughed when she saw the stunned look that crossed his face.  “You’ll have to work harder than that, Ser!”  Cullen shook his head, then charged her.  

One strong hand wrapped around her left forearm, the other cupped the back of her neck as he used one foot to kick her leg out from under her.  The tug on her upper body upset her balance and soon she was on her back.  He straddled her hips, pinning her to the ground.  His shirt had torn, leaving part of his heaving chest bare.  Firm muscles were lightly covered in golden hair.  A lifetime of discipline and training had yielded a hard chest, firm abdomen, and shoulders wide enough to block the sun as he towered over her.

“Do you yield now, Herald?”  Cullen’s grin was very confident.  His Commander voice a silken weapon all it’s own.  She took a moment to allow her gaze to travel over him freely.  She never wanted to forget how sexy he looked as he loomed over her.

“You seem to be obsessed about this yielding, Ser!”  Evelyn flashed a wicked grin and placed her right palm to the exposed portion of her opponents chest.  The Commander looked confused, then slightly pleased, before he screamed.  Evelyn sent a hard jolt of electricity through his body.  He fell like a puppet whose strings had been cut, pinning her beneath him.  She shoved at his left shoulder with her right hand, and his hip with her knee, rolling the dead weight off her.  She was panting from exertion when she finally stood up.  “Yeah, I totally need to work out.  I won!  Sort of.”

“That was bracing...”  the Commander groaned.  Her opponent was opening his eyes already.  He sat up.  She offered him a hand up and he took it, smiling.  “Congratulations, Inquisitor.  I yield.”  

“Thank you Commander.”  Evelyn returned his smile. Maker, he looked good sweaty. “Come have a drink with me at the tavern.  Everyone will want one while while they settle their bets.”  She didn’t wait for an answer, but took his arm and moved through the crowd towards the tavern.

“Shouldn’t I at least change my shirt?”  He protested.  She took a long, slow look.

“Nothing wrong with that one...” She shrugged.  “Reminds me of one of Varric’s shirts.”

“Now I really feel like I should change.”  Cullen blushed.  Now that the adrenaline was passing she realized she wasn’t being fair to him.  How long was she going to flirt with a man who clearly disliked it?  Either he didn’t like flirting, or he didn’t like her.

“Do whatever you feel you need to do, Commander.  I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”  She dropped his arm and moved away.  Maker, she had felt so incredibly happy a moment ago. Now she felt so incredibly stupid.

 

Cullen felt incredibly stupid.  The Inquisitor had invited him for a drink, had been sending good signals, and he’d gotten all nervous about his...shirt?  Even if he caught up with her now, left his shirt as it was, the moment was gone.  Ruined.  Like his shirt.  Cullen felt a heavy hand on his shoulder.

“Excellent fight, Commander.”  The Iron Bull pulled him out of the flow of people and out of hearing of anyone else.  “She didn’t hold back with you.”

“Thank you?”  Cullen knew this was leading to something.  Iron Bull didn’t bother to speak with someone unless he had something worth saying.  He didn’t need Bull to tell him he’d just made a huge mistake.

“You were doing really well up until that last conversation there.  Body language reveals a lot.”  Bull’s eye was studying Cullen’s face.  “Look, I know that she’s an equal opportunity flirt, so it could be hard to tell, but I think she really likes you.  You need to figure out if you like her or not.  Because even with my training, I’m not sure.  You’re confusing her too.”   Bull moved back to join the group.  

Cullen quickly moved to his tower where he threw off his ruined shirt and washed his face.  He grabbed a new shirt on the way out and pulled it over his head as he ran.  Maybe this doesn’t have to turn out badly after all.  He just needed to get back to the tavern.  He arrived to the good natured teasing of his soldiers.  The Inquisitor had beaten him fair and square.  She’d beaten all of them as well.  He had thought the battle over, but he had underestimated her.  It was very impressive...and also very attractive.  

“Over here, Curly!”  Varric called.  He was at a table with the Inquisitor, Iron Bull, Dorian, Blackwall and Sera.  They made room for him, but he found himself between Blackwall and Varric, not next to Evelyn where he could have been.

“Decent job on that sparring match, Commander.”  Blackwall said, handing him a beer.  

“To Commander Cullen,”  The Inquisitor picked up her drink.  “All around badass and nice guy.”  The entire tavern took up the toast.  She finished her drink and took Dorian’s from him.  She had settled with her back against the Iron Bull as if he were a tree.  

“Varric!”  Evelyn demanded.  “Tell me why you call him Curly!  His hair isn’t very curly...”  The gaze she turned on Cullen seemed to have an accusatory shade attached to it.  She reached out her hand as if to touch his hair.  “Do you do something to it?”

“Um...how many has she had?”  Cullen automatically pulled away from her and looked at the others.  He’d only been gone a few minutes.

“Not enough.”  She answered herself, her tone much cooler as she returned both hands to her pilfered glass.  She stared into it for a moment before finishing Dorian’s drink and putting down the glass with a wince.

“Are you hurt?”  Iron Bull noticed instantly.  

“Why wouldn’t you say something, Love?”  Dorian tsked at the Inquisitor as he picked up her left hand.  He examined it and declared that it was not broken.  He sent healing magic through the other mage, but she still didn’t look comfortable.  He leaned in to whisper to the Herald.  The Tevinter was too close!

“I hit that wrist during the first exchange.”  Cullen was furious at himself for hurting the Inquisitor.  “You fought the entire rest of the battle one handed?  I thought you stopped using it because I disarmed you.  I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry, Inquisitor.”

“You didn’t.” She shrugged.  “I mean, it hurt pretty good when it happened, but it wasn’t serious enough to stop sparring.  I take way bigger hits than that in the field.  Don’t worry about it.”

And then his day went from bad to worse.  Someone brought them more drinks.  The Inquisitor picked up a glass that looked like it had fruit in it, and settled herself comfortably between leaning on Bull, and resting her legs on Dorian’s lap.  She began sliding bits of wine soaked fruit up the edge of the glass, catching them on the tip of her tongue.  She carefully maneuvered the fruit into her mouth, not spilling a drop.  Maker help him...he couldn’t help thinking about things she might do with those lips.

“You’ve got a talented tongue Inquisitor.”  The Bull rumbled.  Cullen was upset that the Qunari’s thoughts had mirrored his own so perfectly.

“So very talented...” She agreed with a tipsy smile.  “And so wasted lately...so tragic.”

“You torture me so!”  Dorian teased.  She had just grinned.  Cullen left shortly after that.  His moment with her was broken, and he didn’t wish to watch Evelyn have one with someone else.

 

~oOo~

 

Cullen was walking up the stairs in the rotunda to meet with Leliana in her rookery when he overheard something that made him pause.

"You want to do this here?" It was the Inquisitor.  She often spoke with Dorian in his favorite alcove, about what, Cullen didn't wish to dwell.  He stopped in his tracks in the shadows on the steps.  Could they possibly...in the library?

"Oh, you know me, Love. I'm willing to do it wherever you like, but no one comes around here this time of day, so we're assured of privacy."  Dorian's smooth voice dripped innuendo.  Cullen clenched his fists, crushing the reports he held.

"What if someone sees?"  The Inquisitor persisted.  Sees what?

"I'll be quick, Love, I promise."  Dorian's husky laughter shot darts right through Cullen's chest.  "There will be nothing for anyone to see.  We'll just move your robe a little, and it will be over before anyone is the wiser."

All Cullen could think about was how he wished the stairs would collapse and take him with them.  How to get out?  But his feet seemed stuck to the floor.  He had known that others found the Inquisitor attractive, but he'd never dreamed that he'd missed his opportunity so thoroughly.  He heard feet on the steps from the stairs descending from the rookery.  They were about to get caught!

"Just turn around and shift your robe, Love.  Don’t fiddle with the armored thing around your waist. It’s not in the way."  Dorian said, matter of factly.

"All right, Dorian.  Try to go easy."  The Inquisitor sighed.  Cullen heard the rustle of fabric and tried not to imagine what was about to happen next.  He'd lived in the Circle.  He knew that what physical pleasures could be found were hurried affairs, taken when and where one could find them.  Evelyn had been a Circle mage, she had probably...

"Oh, Love,"  Dorian tsked at her.  "I'll be so gentle..."  The Tevinter whispered a magic word.

"Ah!  Dorian!"  The Inquisitor gasped.  Cullen's spine straightened so quickly he banged his head on the wall behind him.

"Inquisitor...Dorian."  Leliana's voice was as calm as always.  She must have been the one on the stairs.  How could she sound so normal? "What are you doing?"

"Hello, Leliana."  Dorian's amusement was evident in his voice.  “Our beloved Inquisitor received a new and improved harness for her staff from Dagna.  Said harness rubbed uncomfortably against what used to be a lovely mole on her shoulder blade."  To the Inquisitor he said, "It's all done now, Love.  You can fix your robes.  I told you there was nothing to see if we did it like this.  Leliana and I barely got a glimpse of your bare shoulder.  Hardly worth the trouble."

The three of them chatted together as Cullen felt his knees go weak.  He had to lean against the wall to remain upright. He closed his eyes and took a breath.  It had all been perfectly innocent, and his mind had gone...somewhere very wrong.  He opened his eyes to lock gazes with Leliana.  

"Commander.  How kind of you to meet me, but I thought we were meeting in your office?"  Leliana smoothly greeted him.  Cullen was sure that she knew he'd been there before she'd addressed him directly.

"Yes,"  Cullen stepped fully into the room, his gaze drawn from Leliana to the two mages in the alcove.  The spymaster had covered for him beautifully. The Inquisitor was twirling her ponytail with her fingers.  Her robe was mercifully in the correct placement.  Dorian was wiping his hands on a towel as he smirked at Cullen.  "I have copies of the reports you wanted in my office..."  He nodded to the others as he followed Leliana down the stairs to the first floor of the rotunda, then out to his tower office.

"I was..."  Cullen began.  His face was so hot!

"No need to explain, Commander,"  Leliana took the crushed reports from him and turned to leave.  He wasn’t surprised.  He was of no use to her like this.  He’d have to meet with her later.

"Do...do you think they knew I was listening?"  He asked, mortified.

"I don't think so," the Spymaster smiled. "But if you're going to be eavesdropping in the future, you'll have to get better at it."  Cullen sagged into the chair behind his desk.  Leliana closed the door on her way out.

 

~oOo~

 

A few days after Cullen’s sparring match with the Inquisitor she had stopped training with the templars.  She trained exclusively with her team after that.  A few of his people had expressed relief over that turn of events.  She almost never came by his office anymore.  There had been that one time where she’d asked him to go for a walk.  He must’ve done something wrong, though.  She had quickly rescinded the invitation and disappeared for days.  They barely spoke outside the war room.  If not for their weekly chess games, he’d never see her. He was at a loss.  He didn’t know what to do, all he seemed to be able to talk about was business.

A week after the sparring match he found a wrapped package on the center of his desk.  Inside was a new shirt, a gift from the Inquisitor to replace the one destroyed in the last moments of their contest.  It had red piping along the collar and sleeves.  It was his new favorite shirt.  

Cullen wanted to thank the Inquisitor.  He found her in another man’s arms.  Inside one of the out of the way rooms, the Inquisitor was learning how to dance the most popular courtly styles.  Josephine was giving instructions.  Dorian swirled the Inquisitor around the room gracefully.  Her brows were knit together in concentration.  

“May I help you, Commander?”  Josephine addressed him after her students finished the dance.

“I needed to speak to her for a moment.”  He said. This is the perfect excuse to talk to her about something not related to the Inquisition.

“Inquisitor?”  Josephine raised her voice to be heard across the room. “That’s enough for now.  I think you’re ready for the Winter Palace. The Commander wishes to speak with you, if you have a moment.” She gestured for Dorian to come with her as she disappeared up the stairs.

“Just in time, Commander.”  The Herald glided over to him, a small curve gracing her mouth.  She looked up at him expectantly.

“I...I wanted to thank you for the new shirt.”  Cullen rubbed the back of his neck.  This had sounded much better in his head.  “It’s...very nice.”

“You’re very welcome.”  She stood close.  Her pink tongue appeared briefly as it moistened her crimson lips.  Her eyes moved over his face as if searching for something.  “I figured since I was the one who tore the other one, I should replace it.”

“You didn’t have to...” Cullen stuttered. “Thank you. Again.”

“I heard you liked red.”  Her voice was soft, cheeks pink.  Her fair skin looked so inviting when it was flushed like that.

“You did?”  Cullen’s heart was pounding.  She knew about things he liked.  “I mean, yes.  I do.”  She nodded, but didn’t say anything.  Her eyes were definitely looking at his mouth now.  Should he kiss her?  Yes, definitely.  But she was the Herald of Andraste.  He should kiss her anyway.  It would be worth it.  He took too long to work this through, and again the moment was gone.  The Inquisitor stepped slowly away.

“I’m happy that you like it, Commander.”  She said quietly before walking up the stairs.  His shoulders slumped.  What was his problem?

   

“Oh, Dorian,”  Evelyn sighed sadly.  She was with the other mage in their favorite spot at the tavern that evening.  “I am so very much in love with him.  I am so screwed.  You told me that the shirt would give us something to talk about, but he just looked trapped.” Like he was afraid to offend her by turning her down.

“Well, I underestimated his ability to be thick headed.”  Dorian said.  “Maybe your lightning magic shorts out his brain.  Or his-”  Evelyn interrupted him.

“I’ve been hoping my entire life for a man that makes me feel like he does, and now there are just...Things.  So many...Things.”  Evelyn just didn’t know what to do.  “I want to kiss him, but he’s my advisor.  It wouldn’t be fair to pressure him since he has to report to me.”  She took a long drink of her wine.  “I’ve never even had a real relationship before.  The Inquisition is too important to too many people to risk it for my personal drama. So, yay!  Being the Herald is great!”

“What do you mean you’ve never had a real relationship?”  Dorian delved.

“When I first went to the Circle, I made a friend named Kali.  She was a few years older, and had been there a while.  She became my best friend, like a sister.  Kali was very beautiful, and eventually she caught the attention of the men.”  Evelyn took a sip of her drink. “Did you know that if a mage becomes pregnant, they take the child away after it’s born?”  

“Barbaric.” Dorian grumbled.  He’d heard about the horrible things that had been done in Circles, and not just from Evelyn.

“In the Circle, you’re not supposed to fall in love, Dorian.”  Evelyn felt the grief for her friend that she’d so carefully hidden in a box, escape.  She’d done it with a number of painful memories.  It flooded her, broke her heart, and felt like a fresh wound.  “So many of us take what we can, when we can in the corners and storerooms.  When Kali had her baby, they just took him from her.  She had nothing, not even one memory of just holding her baby.  She never really recovered from the birth.  I think having her baby taken just ripped the life from her.  She might as well have been tranquil.”  

“And you didn’t want that for yourself, so you have spent your life avoiding love.”  Dorian summed up.

“That’s pretty much it.”  Evelyn smiled sadly. “But I went one step further...I won’t have children.  I will never have them if it means risking having them taken from me.  I am not inexperienced by any stretch of the imagination, but I never let a man’s penis anywhere near where that could happen.  Oral sex only.  I have rules.”  Then there was that one templar that she had been so tempted to break all the rules for.  But they’d been found out to be meeting secretly, and she’d never seen him again.  “Never?”  Dorian’s eyebrows climbed his forehead.  “How do you survive?”

“I have excellent oral skills.”  Evelyn flicked her tongue and flipped a bit of wine soaked fruit into her mouth.  “I should put that statement into the past tense.  Because, Feelings.  Because, Inquisition.  Because...I am so very screwed.”

“Or not.”  Dorian smiled.  “As in your case.”

“I thought you were my friend.”  She groaned.

    “You know that there are any number of men, young, old, and in between, who would be delighted to share your bed.  I can arrange to have several birth control charms sent here from Tevinter.  And if you decided to have a family, I highly doubt anyone would try to take the Inquisitor’s child away from her and survive.  There is no reason for you to be alone, Love.”  Dorian sipped his drink.  

    “There are a hundred reasons for me to be alone.”  Evelyn sighed.  Everyone she loved was taken from her.

  


Cullen sat with Blackwall across the tavern from Dorian’s regular table.  He tried not to watch them, but found his eyes drawn over to them every few minutes.  The Herald looked strangely sad.  What could have put that look on her face?  Cole appeared next to him suddenly.  Whispering.

“His voice...like Orlesian chocolate...Creamy...Melting on my tongue...sweet...rare...want him...his voice...warm...toes curl when he laughs...smooth...could listen to him forever...his voice...what does he sound like when he...?'  She always stops thinking about it right then...she's afraid.  Cullen, I don't understand...how does someone want something, but are afraid of it at the same time?”

“I am unsure, Cole.”  Cullen considered the boy next to him.  Cole was very strange, and sometimes made him uncomfortable.  How deep could Cole see inside him?  “Maybe it’s because wanting something and taking it are two different things.  Change is scary because sometimes it hurts.  And there are no guarantees.  Especially when feelings are involved.”

“It hurts, even if the change will be good?”  Cole asked.

“Sometimes.  Like growing pains.”  Cullen said.

“Oh....that helps!”  Cole disappeared again.  Cullen looked all around, but didn’t see him.

“I hate it when he does that.” Blackwall grumbled.

 

~oOo~

 

    It was late that night when Cullen made his way to the area off the garden that had been set up as a temple.  Kneeling before the statue of Andraste, he began to pray.  He was so torn between what he wanted and what he’d been taught his entire life.  He loved Evelyn.  He could no longer deny the reality.  She was so divine she practically glowed with it.  It made him want to fall on his knees before her.  She was so real, so solid and human.  It made him want to pull her into his arms and do all the sinful things he had been trying not to think about.  He wasn’t sure how long he had been there before he head a soft footstep behind him.

    “What troubles you, Commander?”  Mother Giselle’s accented voice echoed softly through the room.  Cullen sighed, his shame a lead cloak over his shoulders.  He sat on a bench, the cleric joining him.  Her face was warm and caring.  Non judgmental.

    “I have thoughts...feelings that I should not have.  It is a woman for whom I should not feel this way, Revered Mother.”  Cullen moved to a bench, and Mother Giselle sat beside him.

    “Is she married?”  She asked.  Cullen shook his head.  “Is she too old, or too young?”

    “She is...young, but not indecently so.”  Cullen rubbed the back of his neck.  He was a bit uncomfortable about the difference, but it wasn’t his biggest concern. “It is the Herald.  I am in love with the Herald of Andraste and I am having trouble reconciling my feelings with Chantry teachings.”  Saying it out loud somehow made it easier to breathe.  

    “Commander, I understand why this would trouble you.  You are a devout man who has served the Chantry all of your adult life.  As a templar your natural desires were discouraged.  Now you are free from that, and want what other men have.  That is nothing to be ashamed of.”

    “But what if...?”  Cullen’s throat worked.  He couldn’t even voice this fear out loud.

    “What if you’re not worthy of her?”  She suggested.  Cullen gasped and looked into the Cleric’s eyes.  It was as if she could see everything.  She smiled when she registered his surprise.  “Do you think you are the first man with these worries?  Whenever the heart is engaged, we worry that we cannot be what the other needs.  That we are not smart enough, attractive enough, devout enough.  Do you not think your love has her own fears?”

    “But she truly is divine, Mother Giselle.  It’s like falling in love with Andraste herself.”  Cullen stood and moved to the door.  He stared into the darkened garden.   This was a time of war and struggle.  He had an army to worry about.  How could he even think about romance at this time?

    “Sometimes, we forget that Andraste was first a woman.  And when offered a place at the side of the Maker, she told him no.  She told him that her people needed her, but she needed them as well.  She didn’t do everything alone.  Even though it is discussed in scandalized whispers, I do believe that Shartan was Andraste’s lover.  Or if not him, then someone else.  She was divine, but she was still human.”  The Cleric smiled gently at his shocked expression.  “You think you are not worthy, but I ask you who else would fight by her side longer?  Who could love her more than you?  Do you know anyone who you feel is more worthy than you?  Would you rather see her in the arms of another man?  Would he honor her in body and deed more reverently than you would?”  Cullen shook his head.  Each question stripped away more of his reservations until he felt utterly exposed. Then she moved in for the kill.  “Or would you doom her to be alone?”

    “Alone?”  His mind was whirling.    When he’d discussed his lyrium addiction, and his experiences at the Ferelden Circle with her, Evelyn had confided that she often felt isolated due to her position.

    “Yes, alone.  Perched on a pedestal, untouched and unloved, like a marble statue.”  Giselle looked at the statue of Andraste that dominated the room.  His eyes followed her gaze. “Cold.  Distant.  Would you rather that for her then?”

    “No.”  Cullen answered.  “She loves the people, and she likes to be warm.”

    “Then you have your answer, Commander.  The Maker doesn’t want his children to be alone.  He created desire and passion to bring us together.”  Giselle smiled.  “I very much believe that this fighting does not please him.  That the Maker would much rather have us live in peace with our neighbors and love each other.”

 

~oOo~


	3. The Hush of Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Later that night Cullen lay in his bed, staring up at the stars. The Herald had kissed him. True, they had been drunken kisses on her part, but delightful all the same. He was restless and lustful. Before, he would have denied those feelings. Now, he lightly stroked himself through his smallclothes. It was nice. He refused to feel guilty. His thoughts drifted to a dream he’d had several times since he’d come to terms with his desires for Evelyn.

Chapter Three:  The Hush of Night

 

~oOo~

 

The latest rumors about Dorian and the Inquisitor being lovers were driving Cullen out of his mind.  Every time he walked around Skyhold, people were spinning the latest tale about mage on mage debauchery.  He heard about the hours they spent in the library, the tavern, her room!  Even worse, sometimes the Iron Bull was included in these rumors, creating even more salacious stories about threesomes in the Inquisitor’s tower.  

Finally, Cullen got word that Dorian and the Herald had left for Redcliffe, and would possibly be staying at the inn there.  Alone.  Usually she took three people with her and stayed in a camp set up by the Inquisition.  It couldn’t possibly be business.  It had to be of a personal nature.  Speculation was rampant over what kind of personal business was taking place.

These thoughts had Cullen walking the battlements that night.  It was very cold, but he didn’t care.  He’d finally made up his mind that falling in love with the Herald of Andraste wouldn’t get him struck down by lightning or otherwise bring the end of the world.  The opportunity to love someone, not the Herald or the Inquisitor but Evelyn, to have her love him back, he would risk anything for that, for however long she allowed him to be with her.

He was surprised to see Iron Bull walking the battlements as well.  He stood staring off in the direction of Redcliffe. They greeted each other with nods as Cullen came near.  He stood silently beside the Bull for some time before the Qunari spoke.

“I see you’ve come to the same conclusion that I have.”  Bull observed.

“What conclusion is that?”  Cullen inquired.

“That your heart is engaged.  Like it or not, you’re in love.”  Bull smiled.

“Are we in love with the same person?”  Cullen was no longer intimidated by competition.  He had concluded that Evelyn was worth fighting for, and he was worthy of her. Iron Bull laughed out loud for several minutes.  Cullen grew more and more confused as the horned man bent double. Why was that idea so ridiculous?

“I highly doubt it.”  Bull had to lean on the wall for support.  “I’ve got it bad for a ‘Vint!  Me!  Spy!  With a mage who is also a ‘Vint.  That’s just crazy.”  Cullen was stunned.  The Iron Bull and Dorian?

“Are you, together?”  Cullen asked.

“Oh, we’re totally doing it.”  Bull grinned.  “But Dorian has commitment issues.  His family wanted to marry him off to a woman.  Family legacy and all that.  But he wouldn’t even know what to do with a woman, you know?  So he had some kind of falling out with his family, and the Inquisitor is taking him to Redcliffe to try to work something out.”

“Oh...” Cullen frowned, thinking.  His face cleared after a moment.  He shook his head as if to clear it of cobwebs.  That...explained so much.

“I know, right?”  Bull agreed.  “Early on, I thought for sure he was going after the Herald, but turns out they were just close from that whole time travel to the future thing.  That was really fucked up.”

“What about the constant flirting they do then?”  Cullen asked.  “I mean...”

“Yeah,”  Bull folded his arms over his chest as he continued.  “Tevinter nobles are real uptight about appearances.  It’s a cover.  Mostly.  I think they both enjoy giving people the wrong impression.”

“So she knows?”  Cullen wondered what life in Tevinter would be like for someone who had to hide their nature in such a way.  It couldn’t be pleasant to have to lie every day to everyone.  Or be the one who had been lied to by their spouse.

“She knows.  The two of them like to get together to ogle the new recruits, the workmen, the soldiers...you. Then they bonded over ‘The List.’”  Bull grumbled.  The List was a top ten listing on different hilarious and often naughty subjects.  Copies of the list just appeared around Skyhold at intervals.  Subjects ranged from Top Ten Hottest Leathers for Spring to Top Ten Cutest Skyhold Matches.

“That was them?”  Cullen laughed out loud.  He shouldn’t have been surprised.

“Laugh if you want, you got the number one listing on ‘Top Ten Male Butts.’  I only got number three.”  Bull seemed to be greatly offended by this.

“They were responsible for ‘Top Ten Best Titties?’”  Cullen remembered that the Inquisitor had taken the top slot on that one.  An assessment he’d found himself agreeing with wholeheartedly.

“No, that was me and Sera.  She’s still trying to get the Inquisitor to let her feel her tits.  Remember that time Sera asked?”  Iron Bull said, Cullen nodded.  “She still asks...and the Inquisitor still says, ‘All polite requests will be considered.’  Then she says no.”

“Does she get a lot of these...polite requests?”  Cullen’s amber eyes slanted over to the Qunari.  He had heard all kinds of stories, some fun, some intimidating, some sexy.

“Yeah. There are a few folks around from her old circle at Ostwick, so there are a couple people around she’s said yes to in the past.  Some of them have approached her here, but she always turns them down nice.  She lets everyone think they might have a chance.  Does a good job of making them feel good about being turned down.”  Bull smiled.

“Did she turn you down?”  Cullen asked.

“Yeah, she did.”  The Bull said. “More than once, actually.  You?”

“Not yet...” Cullen sighed.  He felt the pressure on his chest lighten.  He tried not to wonder if the reason he hadn’t been turned down was only that he hadn’t made a request of his own yet.

“Good luck.” Bull said.

“You too.”  Cullen and Bull looked at each other, a new understanding between the two men.  They both turned back to the road, standing silent sentry.

 

~oOo~

 

Cullen had been quite impressed with how Evelyn had handled herself during the events at the Winter Palace.  She had brokered peace, gotten the Inquisition new agents, and secured the allegiance of Empress Celene and Orlais as a whole.  He had watched her hold her own in The Game with some of the best players in all of Thedas.  And in the end, she had reunited lovers, and won the evening by using her cleverness to stop the Duchess without more bloodshed.  He was proud to be a part of the Inquisition that night.

    After things had settled, Cullen knew that his moment was imminent.  He wouldn’t allow it to pass again.  He had a plan.  He was going to ask Evelyn to dance with him. If she said yes, if she got that soft look on her face again, he would not miss his chance.  He watched that court mage, Morrigan, speaking with the Herald outside.  Their conversation ended and Morrigan exited the balcony, leaving Evelyn alone.  He took a deep breath and stepped forward.  

 

    Evelyn was enjoying her moment of victory on the balcony.  She took a deep breath of the cool night air.  She knew someone would find her soon enough.  They always did.

    “There you are! Everyone’s been looking for you.  Things have calmed down for the moment.  Are you all right?”  Cullen asked.  Evelyn’s breath caught.  He looked so good in his formal uniform.  The fabric stretched over his shoulders and nipped in at his waist.  The effect was devastating.  She hadn’t been the only one to think so, either.  Poor guy had been dodging groping hands all evening.

    “Things went according to plan for once.  I couldn’t be happier.”  She said.

    “This whole operation had me on edge.  I’m glad it’s over.  I know it’s foolish, but I was worried for you tonight.  I may never have another chance like this, so I must ask.  May I have this dance, My Lady?” Cullen bowed and held out his hand.  He’d said no earlier when she’d asked him for a dance.  She should say no.  She shouldn’t allow herself this pleasure.  She found herself saying yes anyway.  He had smiled at her, it seemed to turn her brain off.

    “Of course.  I thought you didn’t dance.”  She placed her hand in his.  He pulled her into his arms.  

    “For you, I’ll try.”  Cullen smiled. He had a natural grace, but clearly wasn’t a dancer.  Evelyn didn’t care.  She had her hands on him, he had his on her.  It was perfect.  The music stopped and so did they.  She slipped her arms around him, burying her face in his chest.  She breathed in his scent, then released him.  He’d been chased all evening by people who wanted something from him.  She was no better, really.

    “Thank you, Commander.”  Evelyn felt the tears trying to escape. “That was...lovely...”  She avoided looking at his face, afraid she’d see what she’d always seen, Cullen looking so unbearably unsure.  So she escaped back to her room.  There, she could cry for a while.  Then, after she’d indulged enough for one evening, she’d take the memory, and fold it away in a little box in the corner of her mind.  That’s what she did with things she couldn’t afford to think about.  Feelings that she couldn’t afford to feel.  Just like Cullen had taught her.

 

    Cullen stood on the balcony confused and alone.  Things had been going well, she had been in his arms, and she seemed to like being there.  He had been ready.  Had she just run away from him?  Dorian and Iron Bull joined him.  They must have seen Evelyn’s escape.

    “What happened?”  Dorian looked confused as well.  He and Bull both leaned up against the marble railing, shoulders touching, but no other contact to give away their relationship.  “I thought you were going to be decisive, Commander.”

    “I was.”  He argued. “The moment didn’t happen.  After the music ended, she...hugged me.  Then thanked me for the dance and left.  She didn’t even look at me.”  Dorian immediately looked concerned.  

    “I’ll go find out what happened.” Dorian stood to leave. “I wouldn’t expect me back, Bull.  I think this may require hard liquor.”

    “Well, shit.”  Bull said, folding his arms over his chest.  “Neither one of us getting lucky tonight, Cullen.”

    “Maker’s Breath.  I should have known.  No plan of action survives contact with the target.”  Cullen groaned.  He rubbed the suddenly tense muscles of his neck.  Iron Bull laughed, then moved off to find them both drinks.  He also brought back some yummy spicy nuts.

 

    “Evelyn!”  Dorian knocked lightly on the door to the Inquisitor’s rooms.  “Let me in Love, you know you want to talk.”  The door opened and the Herald’s chambermaid, Melissa, peeked out at him.  She looked worried.

“She doesn’t want to speak to anyone right now, Ser.”  The young woman glanced worriedly over her shoulder toward the bedroom door.  “My Lady is very upset, and she’s already in bed.”

“Let me just check on her.  If she asks me to go, I will.  I promise.”  Dorian was really concerned now.  Melissa, used to his unusual visits, stepped back to allow him to pass.  He slowly moved to the bedroom and peered through the open door.  

Evelyn was lying on her side, facing away from the door.  She had her knees curled up, and her hands fisted in the covers.  She didn’t turn when Dorian came in and sat next to her feet.  He placed a bottle of fine Orlesian brandy on the floor.

“What happened, Love?”  He waited.  It would happen.

“Oh, Dorian!”  The tears started, and soon she was crying all over his formal uniform.  

 

~oOo~

 

Cullen waited in his office for Dorian and Iron Bull to meet with him.  The Tevinter had indeed not returned that night in the Winter Palace.  Cullen and Bull had spent the night drinking and trying not to feel sorry for themselves.  They had gotten back to Skyhold, but Evelyn had taken Dorian, Varric, and Cassandra out into the field immediately.  They had been gone over two weeks, and now was the first time there had been a chance to meet.  Bull had assured Cullen that Evelyn wouldn’t have been upset if she didn’t care.  But he could not feel good about her feeling bad.

“Hey, Cullen.”  The Qunari said as he and the Tevinter ducked into his office and closed the door.  He sighed with relief.  Iron Bull set a bottle down in the center of Cullen’s desk.  He’d also brought three glasses, setting them down with a small clink.  

“Commander,” Dorian smiled.  “Let us all have a drink while I tell tales about my best friend.  All in her own best interests, of course.”  Bull poured and passed the drinks around.  They all tossed it down.  Bull repeated this twice before sitting down in one of the chairs Cullen had brought in.

“I am ready.” Cullen said from the safety of his desk.  He hoped that declaring it so would make it true.  He gripped the arms of his chair, knuckles white.

“All right.”  Dorian began, leaning forward conspiratorially.  “There were many tears that night at the Winter Palace.  It’s been building up for a while, and most of it had nothing to do with you.  The relevant information is that Evelyn has never had to be a leader before, so she seeks advice from those she respects.  It seems as if, all the way back in Haven, Evelyn spoke to Cassandra about military fraternizing.  She told Evelyn that it wasn’t tolerated, you would be separated, all sorts of hideous consequences, consent issues, etc.”

“My consent?  I wish she would take advantage.  That particular protocol doesn’t fit our situation.  She’s not military.  It doesn’t apply at all.”  Cullen poured himself another drink.  

“But you do report to her.”  Dorian pointed out.  “So in her mind, if she makes a move, she’s taking advantage of her position.  Evelyn also might have mentioned that when you and she are in any moment that might approach romantic, you look...trapped.”

“Do you feel trapped?”  Bull asked gently.

“Not...trapped, but hesitant.  I had some...faith issues around my feelings about the Herald of Andraste.”  Cullen’s face turned red. “I had a discussion with Mother Giselle about it.  And it is no longer a problem.”

“I’ll bet.  Guy like you, served the Chantry faithfully your whole life.  Suddenly you start having lusty feelings for a woman who is a religious figure.  Pair that with the Chantry’s reserved stance on sex...” Iron Bull shook his head.  “That could really fuck with a guy’s head.”

Cullen slumped in his chair, tipping his head back and staring at the ceiling.  It had, indeed messed with his head.  He only hoped he could salvage that tiny bond he’d felt forming with Evelyn.

“She also has concluded that all the teasing that the rest of us enjoy has added undue pressure to you.”  Dorian waved an elegant arm.  “This is of course, ridiculous.” He added when Cullen tensed to protest.  “I’ve tried to disabuse her of this notion, but she underestimates her own appeal.  She cares about your well being, Commander.  She knows that your rank is very important to you, and wouldn't want to do anything to risk your professional reputation. That is encouraging, but there we are.  Add to all of this, the pressure that she’s under with everything we’ve asked her to do to save the world, and her own natural stubbornness.  I’m not sure how we help her past this snag.”

“I don’t know what to do either,” Cullen sighed, he should have kissed her that night after Haven. “Other than simply walk up to her and make a ‘polite request’ to kiss her.”

“I think that might have worked once upon a time, but now, I think she’d just say no.  See  reasons listed previously.”  Dorian said.  

“We need to get her wound up.  Get all her hormones going, nature will take over.  She’s halfway there already.” Iron Bull scratched his chin, an idea forming in his mind.  “We need reinforcements.  Time to bring in Red.”  Using the word reinforcements to describe the Spymaster was certainly an understatement. She would have a plan. That sent a shiver of trepidation over Cullen.

 

~oOo~

 

“Today promises to be entertaining...”  The next afternoon, Dorian had enticed Evelyn to come share a picnic with him.  They were at their favorite ogling spot along the battlements. It provided a perfect view down on the training grounds.  New troops arrived daily, and there were always new people to watch.  “We’ve got a new batch in from Denerim.  I hear the dog lords are built.  Are they?”

“Denerim, eh?”  Evelyn popped a grape into her mouth and chewed.  She pointedly ignored Dorian’s query into the size of Ferelden men.   “The King of Ferelden holds court there.  Interesting to see that they came here, instead of joining his army.”

“Not too surprising if you want to know the truth.  The Inquisition is on everyone’s lips!  You’re one of the most politically potent women in all of Thedas. You’re a powerful mage, which is both alluring and frightening to the regular folk. Not to mention that you’re attractive, single, and are known for saying things like, ‘All polite requests will be considered.’  How can they resist?”  Dorian gestured elegantly as he spoke.

“I should have known that would come back to bite me on the ass.”   Evelyn groaned.  She ate a square of cheese to cover her embarrassment.  “If I’d have known I was going to become the Inquisitor, or that the Herald of Andraste would turn into a Thing, I’d have never said it to begin with.  Especially to Sera.”  They both laughed.

“Too true.” Dorian turned to watch the new troops coming out to the training area.  “Would you have done it if all you had to worry about was the sheer volume of requests you're getting?”

“That has been surprising, actually...I never expected to have so many.”  A slow grin spread over her face.  “I think I like it, though.  It seems to be a rite of passage for the new people to approach me in a casual setting, then ask for a blessing, a favor, or if they are really brave, a kiss.”

“Really?”  Dorian’s grin matched hers.  “Do you ever say yes?”

“Maybe.”  Evelyn said evasively.  Dorian gave her a look, and she relented. “Enough to keep hope alive for the others.  Sometimes it’s someone who needs help, like the man whose druffalo I found.  There was that man in Redcliffe, I took flowers to his wife's grave.  Or a really shy soldier boy who just needs a little confidence boost; that’s how the blessing evolved.  It has come to mean much more than it did back in Haven.  Now it means that the Inquisitor is approachable.  That I care about what they care about.  It’s allowed me to get to know people I never could have talked to before.”  These little things helped keep her grounded, even as they isolated her from the people.

“I love it.”  Dorian smiled.  “Oh, look!  Here comes our entertainment.”  The newest soldiers in the Inquisition army filed out into the training area.  They had been assigned the standard armor for infantry.  They each had a standard issue sword and shield, but only two of the twelve men looked comfortable with them.  “I wonder whose turn it is to teach today?”  The other mage looked like the suspense would kill him.

“Dorian, relax.”  Evelyn laughed.  “It will be someone handsome, I’m sure.”  She couldn’t say how much she appreciated these moments with her friend.  There were so few people she could truly be herself with these days.  Also, there were always a few drool-worthy men in every new group.  In her currently self imposed chaste state, she would take what she could get.

“I'll say.”  Dorian purred.  Evelyn turned to look and her breath caught.  Commander Cullen was descending the stairs from his tower with Knight-Captain Rylen on one side, and Sergeant de Orville on the other.  Both of the other men walked half a step behind Cullen, his authority and the respect for him evident in the way they interacted with him.  The sun highlighted his blond hair, giving him a golden glow.  The easy way he rested his hand on the sword at his belt spoke of his familiarity with the weapon.  She had first hand experience with his skill and that blade.  He looked so delicious.

The new recruits all straightened up at his approach.  Evelyn watched him interact with the men with great interest.  He rarely talked to the recruits their first day of training.  So why today?  Cullen spoke with the new men, then left them in the gentle care of Sergeant de Orville.  The drills began.  The Commander and Knight-Captain Rylen moved off to a different section of the training grounds.  They spoke quietly for a few minutes before being joined by six male veteran templars.

“Whatever are they doing down there?”  Evelyn wondered out loud.  She sighed in lecherous delight.  “I think we’re in for a special treat, my friend.  Maker!  They’re taking off the armor.”  She nudged Dorian to make sure he was listening.  She actually allowed an aroused moan to escape her mouth as she watched Cullen remove his breastplate.  

“Oh, my.”  Dorian looked like he was about to drool.  The Commander and all the men were now taking off their shirts.  “What a delicious turn of events, Love.”

“I don’t know what to say...”  Evelyn began tugging at her bottom lip distractedly.  There were eight very fit, mature human males in front of her, but she couldn’t draw her eyes away from the man who commanded them.  She’d never seen him bare chested before.  Not completely.  His shoulders were wide enough to carry the world.  His back was broad, narrowing to a tight waist.  His pants stretched over his firm ass as he and Rylen led the men in some stretching exercises.  

“I do. Words like glorious, gleaming, and glistening come to mind.”  Dorian said helpfully.  Evelyn tugged at her lip and watched.  Gorgeous.

  


“We have an audience.”  Rylen had a half smile on his face while he pulled his shirt off over his head.  He tossed it over a post next to Cullen’s.

“I know.”  Cullen smiled, even though his cheeks flushed.  So far, so good.  He glanced up to see that both Dorian and the Inquisitor were paying rapt attention.  “That was the idea...”  

“Ah, I see.”  Rylen’s gaze followed his Commander’s and his eyebrows jerked up in surprise.  “Which one’s attention were you hoping to capture, Commander?  Both the Tevinter and the Inquisitor have many admirers.  Though I think that your chances would be good with either.”  Cullen was startled for a moment.  If his right hand man didn’t even know if he preferred men or women, then Iron Bull was right.  Evelyn would have no hope of realizing how much he cared for her.  Maybe if he said it out loud, it would make it real.

“The Inquisitor haunts me, Rylen.”  Cullen admitted.  “I would do most anything to earn her favor.”  

“Very, well, Commander.”  Rylen grinned.  “Let’s see what we can do.  Also, train the men of course.”

“Of course.”  Cullen agreed.  He felt like he’d just taken a big step.  He glanced up at the battlements before raising his voice to address his men.  They practiced hand to hand techniques, including the throw he had used to take down the Inquisitor during their sparring match.  This continued for almost two hours before he called a stop.

Sergeant de Orville had finished with his group a few minutes before.  Four of the newest men stood to one side, and they seemed to be watching a fifth man approach the Inquisitor.  Cullen folded his arms over his chest to watch as well.  He didn’t know what was going to happen, but he was sure it would be interesting one way or another.  Rylen mimicked Cullen’s pose.

“So, is he a brave one, or did his friends bully him into making a ‘polite request’ of Our Lady Herald?”  Rylen asked.

“I am unsure.”  Cullen winced a bit when the ‘polite request’ was mentioned.  The boy looked to be about twenty years old, but he was tall, and he had a confident smile on his handsome face.  Cullen frowned.  “A cocky one.”

“This ought to be good.”  Rylen leaned back against the fence as if settling in for a show.  Cullen realized he must have been missing something important.  How far had this ‘request’ thing gone?  

“What do you know that I don’t know?”  Cullen arched a brow at the other man.  Rylen looked startled for a moment, then shrugged.  

“Apparently, a great many things, Commander.”  Rylen seemed quite surprised by his Commander’s interest in the Herald.  “I will tell you any tidbits I have, I promise.  But right now, you’ll regret it if you don’t see this.”

“I’m holding you to that, Rylen.”  Cullen muttered as he turned back to the battlements.  Rylen’s support and encouragement were surprising, but welcome.  The young recruit was approaching now.  Cullen watched Evelyn as she stood up and spoke to the soldier.  “He’s so young.”

“He’s uh...”  Rylen coughed.  “He’s the same age as she is, Ser.”  Cullen’s brain froze on that for a moment.  Several seconds passed before he spoke.

“She’s how old?  Do...you know?”  Cullen asked, feeling utterly out of his depth.

“Twenty two, Ser.”  Rylen tried to hide his smile.

“Maker!”  Cullen groaned.  He had been that age when the events of the fifth blight had taken place and the Ferelden Circle had fallen.  She had the skill, knowledge, and rounder figure of a more mature woman. He was over a decade older than she was.  He let that discomfort go with a conscious effort.  He would not allow it to hinder him.  He had experience on his side.  Experience was good.

“Look!”  Rylen pointed.  The young soldier knelt before the Herald, his sword held up in offering.  She took the blade from his hands, moved closer to him and leaned down.  She kissed the boy on his forehead, gestured for him to stand, then returned the blade to him.  She spoke to him a moment longer, then he bowed, turned and left.  She watched him for a moment.  He had a dazed look on his face as he returned to his fellow recruits. They patted him on the back as they moved back to the barracks.   “Huh.  I thought for sure he wasn’t going to be one of those.”

“Does that happen often?”  Cullen was incredulous.  He looked at Evelyn and saw the smile on her face as she helped Dorian gather their picnic things.  “What are they asking her for?”

“Her Blessing.”  Rylen explained.  “Some people ask a favor, a handful make romantic gestures, but most of the time they just want her blessing.  The soldiers have taken to asking in a formal way, like that.  They offer her their weapon, she accepts it, and blesses them.”  

“By kissing them?”  Cullen asked.

“Well, yeah.”  Rylen grinned, his eyes distant.  “When she blessed me, I swear, I felt this strange tingle all over.  It was...nice.”

“Nice?”  Cullen was stunned now.  He remembered a time when she had touched his wrist, sending a distinctive sensual sizzle over his entire body. She was doing that to all of his soldiers?  “You did this, too?”

“Well, actually, Commander,”  Rylen looked uncomfortable.  “I think most of the soldiers that have been through Skyhold do it eventually.  You may be the only one who has been here since the beginning that hasn’t done it.”  Cullen grabbed his shirt, but didn’t put it on yet.

    “Well, we can’t have that...”  He said with determination.  He jogged up the stairs.  Dorian and the Inquisitor had just finished gathering up their things.  He had to see what this was all about.

    “Commander...” Dorian purred.  “How delightful to see you...”  He arched a brow as he shamelessly ran his gaze over Cullen.  

    “Lady Herald, I wish to make a request for your Blessing.”  Cullen used his Commander voice to ask: He was making a formal request of his leader.  He knelt on one knee in front of her.  She gasped.  Clearly, she had never expected him to do such a thing.

    “Cullen,”  She whispered.  He had never heard his name cross her lips before.  His pulse sped up.  He wanted to hear it again.

    “I seem to have forgotten my weapon...”  Cullen said softly.  He looked into her eyes.  They were verdant green and once captured, he didn’t want to allow her gaze to escape him.

    “And your shirt...” Dorian grinned.  They both ignored him.

    “A sword is just a tool.”  Evelyn smiled, but kept holding his gaze.  “Your mind is your true weapon.  Your experience and skill as my Commander are invaluable.  You are the most important soldier in my army.”  She stepped close to him, placed her hands on his bare shoulders, and leaned over to kiss his forehead.  He felt her lips tremble, and he felt the tingle of which Rylen had spoken.  It was not like the raw sensual thrill she had teased him with back in Haven.  This was a gentle tug of magic calling to his soul, as if sealing the promise with a kiss.  No wonder his people all did this.  It felt beautiful and divine.  As she pulled away, his amber eyes sought hers again.  Her red lips parted, breath quick.  Her fingers were still touching the bare skin of his shoulders.  He felt that trembling touch all the way down his spine.  He watched as the creamy skin at her throat flushed pink.  Her reaction was thrilling.

    “You humble me.  Thank you, Inquisitor.”  Cullen said softly, lips quirking.  His voice seemed to startle her, as her eyes widened.  She jerked her hands away from his shoulders and stepped away.

    “Commander...Please excuse me.”  Evelyn gasped.  She hurried away in a brisk, ground eating walk.  Cullen got to his feet and looked at Dorian.

    “What did I do wrong that time?”  He sighed as he tossed his shirt over his head.  

    “Nothing at all, Commander.”  Dorian picked up the basket.  “I think that worked perfectly.  I’ve never seen her get flustered doing a blessing before.  You clearly have her distracted.  Nice call on the shirt...”  The mage laughed as he moved along the battlements in the same direction Evelyn had used to disappear.  Cullen returned to the ring to gather his gear.  Rylen was smiling.

    “Well, Commander.”  Rylen said as they moved in the direction of Cullen’s office.  “That looked promising.”  Cullen’s chest was a little lighter.  She’d gotten flustered.  Promising was good.

 

    Evelyn leaned up against the closed door to her tower.  She stayed in the darkness at the bottom of the stairs because she didn’t think her knees would support her if she tried to climb.  She took a few deep breaths.  She had never thought Cullen would ask for her formal blessing.  He’d been so close she’d been able to smell the oil, leather, and man.  She’d touched his bare shoulders!  What amazing shoulders.  If he hadn’t spoken, she didn’t know how long she might have stood there, staring into those deep amber eyes.  Back to the door, she sank to the floor, resting on her heels.  

    “Maker.  I am in so much trouble.”  The Herald buried her face in her hands.  “So very screwed.”

 

~oOo~  
  


Evelyn and her team had taken down their first dragon:  A Ferelden Frostback that had been nesting in the Hinterlands.  It had spit fire at her.  The Herald of Andraste had shot lightning back, and then doubled down with the use of her Spirit Blade.  She was sure she would feel every bump and bruise from her fight in the morning, but right then, she didn’t care. She had gone mug for mug with Iron Bull in the tavern until they had been kicked out.  She thought Bull might have mentioned that whateverthehell they had drunk was of Qunari origin. but she wasn’t sure.

    She had started the climb to her tower bedroom slowly and carefully.  Melissa heard Evelyn’s stumbling from the chambermaid’s quarters down the hall, and helped her the rest of the way amid much giggling on the Inquisitor’s part.  Before she knew it, Evelyn had been dressed for bed, had her face washed, and been tucked in.  She waited until the other woman left before Evelyn flung back the covers with a giggle.

 

    Cullen was in his office taking a rare moment to read something for pleasure, when someone knocked hesitantly at his tower door.  What could possibly need his attention that couldn’t wait until morning?  He told the person to enter.  He was surprised to see Private Bonds, one of two men who were supposed to be on duty at the top of the mage tower.

    “Commander,” Bonds looked concerned, but tapped his fingers together as if unsure about his choice of action.  “There is a disturbance that needs your attention.”

    “A disturbance?  Is Iron Bull drunk?  I am not putting him to bed again.  Just throw a blanket over him and let him sleep where he is.”  Cullen waved dismissively.  When the Bull passed out, he was almost impossible to move without an entire squad of men. Never again.

    “No, Ser.  Well, yes, Ser. The Bull isn’t the only one.  It’s the Inquisitor, Ser.”  The private looked even more uncomfortable.  “She’s um...been drinking...with the Iron Bull.  He’s quiet, actually.  Annnnnd...the Inquisitor is out on the balcony of her tower shooting magic into the air in all directions...and...”

    “I’ll take care of it.”  Cullen grumbled as he dismissed Bonds.  He was furious.  He knew from experience that a drunken mage could be extremely dangerous.  He set aside the book he had been reading and prepared mentally for his task.  If things went badly he might have to use his templar abilities against the woman he cared about most in all of Thedas.  The Commander opened his door and went outside to assess the damage.  He saw lightning magic in the sky that looked different from what he had anticipated.  He’d thought to see angry electricity shooting through the stars, but what he found froze him where he stood.  

Arcing across the sky were delicate tendrils of light.  Colored swirls twisted and exploded in the air.  It was more beautiful than the fireworks at the Winter Palace.  He was mesmerized as he stood on the walkway between his tower and Solas’s mural room.  The details in the images produced were astounding.  Then he heard it.

    “I am Ataashi!  The Glorious One!  I killed a High Dragon!  Ataaaaaassssshhhhiiiii!  Woo Hoo!”  The Herald called down from her tower.  “Best mage this side of the Fade!”  

    Cullen groaned, then walked quickly to the door that led to the Inquisitor’s room.  This was not the way he’d wanted to enter her bedchamber for the first time, but it couldn’t be helped.   He nodded at the guards on her door as he passed.

    He found Evelyn on the balcony.  She was tracing a small pattern of light in the air in front of her.  It looked like the Inquisition heraldry.  The former Templar approached the former Circle mage just in time to see her blow on the image like she was blowing a kiss to a lover.  The magic grew in size as it drifted away, and finally there was a huge symbol in the sky.  It held for a moment, colors passing over it like a rainbow.  Then it exploded in a flash of light and a shower of sparks.

    “Wow!”  Evelyn giggled wildly.  “I hope I can remember how to do this when I’m sober!”

    “I hope you can, too.”  Cullen agreed.  “Fireworks would be great for the victory celebrations.”  The Herald jumped at the sound of his voice, letting out a little squeak before turning to look at him.  She smiled at him as he joined her at the railing.  “Your ability to control the lightning is amazing.  Especially in your condition.”

“My condition?”  Evelyn’s eyebrows drew down as a wary look crossed her face.  “What have you heard now?  If Corifinus doesn’t kill me, the rumors might.  Have you heard about the parade of gentlemen that are rumored to have made their way through my tower? How do I make the time?  Maker’s Breath!  I’m thirsty!  Debauchery is hard work.”  She stomped off into the central portion of the room.  She plopped down on the sofa and picked up a glass of water that had been thoughtfully left by her chambermaid.  She drank the entire glass, setting it down with a loud thunk.

“I meant that you’re drunk, Inquisitor.”  Cullen followed her inside, closing and locking all the exterior doors in case Evelyn decided to try go outside again to continue her fireworks display.  He had indeed, heard countless tales about the exploits of the Inquisitor.  He was no longer bothered by them.  Some were true, some were not.  They were all worth listening to:  the stories were always epic.  He sat next to her on the couch and gazed into the fire.  

    “That I am.  I couldn’t let Bull outdrink me today.  I killed a dragon today, Cullen.  Have you heard?  Cullen?  Did you hear about my dragon? Culllllleeennn?”  She wiggled closer to him, poking his shoulder over and over as she tried to get him to look at her.

    “I’ve heard several times, how you slayed the Ferelden Frostback with your unbelievable battle magic.”  Cullen laughed.  He turned to look at her and froze.  Maker!  She is barely dressed!  In the semi darkness outside, he hadn’t seen what she’d been wearing.  Now, in the warm light of the fire, the woman who held his heart was revealing more of her skin to him than he’d ever seen outside his fantasies.  She had on a large linen shirt that barely skimmed midthigh.  The laces were loose, allowing the neckline to slip from one shoulder.  He could see she wore nothing to support her breasts, rosy nipples still peaked from the cold pressed against the fabric.  His fingertips tingled.  He licked his suddenly dry lips and forced himself to look at her face.  She was without makeup.  It was the first time he’d seen her so since Haven.  It made their closeness seem somehow more intimate without that barrier between them.

    “Why are you in my room, Cullen?  The next round of rumors will include you.”  Evelyn asked, with a quirk to her lips and her head tilted tipsily.  Her gaze raked his body with an intensity he could feel.  “I don’t think I’m in the right frame of mind to talk about troops deployments.  And it’s late.    A girl could get the wrong idea...”     

“I’m here because you were making a ruckus and keeping all of Skyhold awake.”  Cullen answered gently.  How he wished he were there for more licentious reasons.   “I could hear you from the my office.”

“No way was I that loud.  I’ve never been that loud.  Not unless I was doing that trick thing I do where I make my voice really loud.  All of Skyhold?”  She shrugged and tossed her loose hair over her shoulder.  The movement of her shoulders sent a ripple through her breasts and made his cock harder than he could ever remember being in his life. He took a moment and just looked at her.  She was so lovely, and that thing she was wearing...wait...

“Is...that my shirt?”  Cullen was incredulous.  He knew it was his because it was the one the Inquisitor had given him after she had ripped his shirt during their sparring match.  It had red piping around the wrists and collar.  It was his favorite shirt.

“Hmmm?”  Evelyn smiled, as she moved quicker than Cullen would have thought possible in her inebriated state.  She gripped his shoulders and used them for leverage as she pulled herself crosswise over his lap.  Cullen could no longer hide his erection.  Her hip was pressed right up against it.  Evelyn gasped.  He groaned.

“Evelyn, I...”  The Commander began.  She shifted her weight.  He sucked in a breath in a long hiss.

“Hmmm...you’re not as indifferent to me as I thought.”  Evelyn smiled, pressing her mouth against his.  The next moment she was kissing him like she had been starving for the taste of him.  Cullen had one hand on her hip and the other over her knee, caressing the sensitive skin along the back.  He pulled her closer, pressing his cock harder against her hip. He broke the kiss only when his need for air became more urgent than his need for her mouth.  

“Wow.”  Evelyn sighed as she curled up in his lap, resting her head against his shoulder.  They both panted for breath.  “Mmm...you smell so good.”  She buried her face in his neck, lips brushing his throat, as she breathed deeply.

Cullen’s hands held her firmly to him.  The situation was delight and torment for him.  She was all warm and wiggly, but she was beyond too drunk to consent to...well...anything, really.  He took a deep breath.  He wanted to be worthy of the trust given to him.  He had to get out of her bedroom before she tempted him further.  As much as he wished to stay and enjoy more of the Evelyn’s uninhibited company, he needed to leave.  Now.

“Evelyn.  I have to go.”  Cullen said less firmly than he had intended.  “Evelyn?”  He looked down at her.  Was she snoring?  His shoulders sagged.  He was partly relieved that she had given into what was in her system, but he was equally disappointed that she was no longer wriggling against his erection.  He indulged in holding her in his arms until the fire burned down to embers.  He carefully stood, lifting her in his arms to carry her to her bed.  He placed her on the bed and pulled the covers over her.  She protested at the loss of his warmth, but settled down again quickly.  

Cullen’s heart floated over her lusty behaviour.  She had wanted him.  He fingered the fabric that made up the sleeve of her nightwear.  Why was she wearing it?  Evidently, this was why his shirts took so long in the laundry.  It seemed so intimate that she would wear them.  If she just liked to sleep in men’s shirts she could have bought her own.  She had buried her face in his neck and fallen immediately to sleep.  Could his scent help her sleep at night?  His mind whirled at the implications.  He pressed a tiny kiss to her forehead, before escaping to his own room.  Things had all gone very differently than he had expected.

 

Later that night Cullen lay in his bed, staring up at the stars.  The Herald had kissed him.  True, they had been drunken kisses on her part, but delightful all the same. He was restless and lustful.  Before, he would have denied those feelings.  Now, he lightly stroked himself through his smallclothes.  It was nice.  He refused to feel guilty.  His thoughts drifted to a dream he’d had several times since he’d come to terms with his desires for Evelyn.  

_He was praying at the feet of a life sized marble statue of Andraste, her features and clothing vague, holding a bowl of fire.  When he looked up again, the face was that of Evelyn.  She was draped in a flowing dress, her hair echoing the folds of the fabric as it cascaded down her back.  Instead of a bowl, she held out both hands, the mark glowing bright green in her left palm.  Behind her, a mosaic depicted her victory over her enemies in heroic fashion._

His cock filled and became fully hard, straining at his smalls.  He removed them, freeing himself for light teasing touches over bare skin.

_Evelyn was so beautiful, but he disliked seeing her features rendered in the cold stone.  He kissed her bare feet.  He climbed onto the large pedestal.  He placed a kiss in her normal palm, then directly on the mark in her other hand.  He was not afraid of this part of her.  He took her hands, then leaned down to kiss her full lips.  Beneath his mouth, her lips slowly warmed.  Her hands gripped his.  He tasted her breath.  Her lips moved under his, returning his kiss.  He pulled back from her to look into her emerald eyes._

Precome leaked from his cock.  He groaned as he smeared the fluid over the head.

_“Cullen,”  She whispered.  “You’re so warm.”  She tunneled both hands into his hair, using her hands to pull him close again._

_“Evelyn, I need you.”  His lips were the tiniest breath away from hers.  “I need to know you need me too.”  He could feel her breath coming in short pants, hot against his lips with each of her exhalations._

_“Kiss me.”  She commanded.  He obeyed, closing the distance instantly.  He cradled her body close to him, pressing her curves against the hard edges of his body.  They touched each other as if hungry for each other.  He kept his mouth pressed to hers as he removed her clothes.  Her hands pulled at his clothes until they were draped over the furniture.  Bare skin suddenly pressed together had them both gasping.  Cullen pressed her naked form against the wall, her legs and arms wrapped around him._

He cupped his balls in his other hand, moving both them and his cock together in a steadily increasing rhythm.

_Cullen’s hands were restless; Tried to touch as much of her skin as he could reach.  He cupped her breasts, lifting and squeezing them.  Evelyn moaned as he teased her pink nipples.  He couldn’t resist, he lowered his head.  His tongue brushed gently, then his teeth scraped, pinching, had her gasping and writhing between his chest and the mosaic behind her.  The strength in her hands as she gripped his shoulders surprised him, and drew his attention back to her face._

    He stroked faster, both hands encompassing his length.

_“Need you.”  She demanded.  Her face was flushed as she rolled her hips against his to emphasize her point.  Her pussy was hot and wet as he pressed his hardness deep.  They both groaned in agonized pleasure as he slid home.  He began working his cock slowly.  A gentle roll of his hips had her crying out with each thrust.  He gripped her hips as he barely held his control, his thrusts steady and powerful.   Her fingers dug into his shoulders as she cried out, her sheath rippling around him, milking his orgasm from him.  She cried out, her husky voice filling the room._

    Cullen tensed in the bed, sweat covering him in a light sheen as he pumped himself to completion.  His eyes opened and he looked up at the stars above him again.  He relaxed, fingers tracing his now softening cock.  Evelyn wore his shirts to sleep in.  She’d said he smelled good before breathing him in.  He found that idea quite intriguing.  He cleaned himself, then settled back, half expecting the guilt that usually accompanied his taking himself in hand.  It didn’t come.  He fell asleep with a small smile, his scar pulling his perfect lips slightly off center.

 

“Does everything have to be so loud?”  Evelyn’s voice was rough the next morning in the war room. She was thoroughly hung over from her adventures the night before.  Add to that, the injuries from the fight with the dragon, and Evelyn felt like maybe she’d actually lost the fight and her friends had all lied to save her pride.  

“I wondered that last night when you were magnifying your voice magically and yelling that you were the ‘best mage this side of the Fade’ from your tower.”  Josephine teased.  Evelyn groaned.

“I wondered that last night when you were creating fireworks in the sky complete with sound.  They were truly amazing, you know.  I hope you remember how to do them today.”  Leliana added.

“I can probably figure it out, but I don’t remember anything past the time my chambermaid put me in my bed.”  Evelyn grumbled.  She found a chair and dragged it close before sitting down gently.  She rested her arms on the war table, then carefully lowered her head onto the nest they created.  She groaned again.  Forgotten drunken shenanigans were a nightmare one could never live down.

 

“You remember nothing?” Cullen’s hand gripped the handle of his sword.  He had awoken, free of nightmares for the first time since he had stopped taking lyrium.  His mood had been better than it had been in years.  Last night, Evelyn had kissed him while writhing on his lap like a desire demon.  How could she remember nothing?  He felt his good mood wither a sad and terrible death.  They had made no progress.  His disappointment felt like a living thing.  Just taking a step seemed to take twice the energy it had just a moment ago.  “Nothing at all?”

“What did I do to inconvenience you, Cullen?”  Evelyn didn’t look up from where she was hiding her head.  Leliana and Josephine seemed very interested in Cullen’s answer.  He pointedly ignored them both.

“You did nothing at all that I found inconvenient, Evelyn.  In fact, everything you did was quite delightful.  The fireworks were particularly lovely.  It was nice to see you relaxed and enjoying yourself.”  Cullen said.  When he told her about their kiss, because he would have to tell her, it would not be in front of an audience.

“I didn’t do anything embarrassing?”  Evelyn’s voice had a vulnerable tremble he’d never heard from her before.  His answer seemed to matter to her.  

“Nothing that I thought was embarrassing.” Cullen said.  He’d certainly found nothing at all wrong with anything that had happened between the two of them.  He just wished he weren’t the only one who knew about it.

“All right, I trust you.” The Herald gripped Cullen’s wrist as he walked past her chair.  He halted immediately, though neither of them looked at the other.

“You can always trust me.”  Cullen said quietly.

“That means a great deal to me.”  Evelyn slowly loosened her grip on his wrist, allowing her fingers to slide down to linger over his gloved hand.  How he wished he hadn’t put them on that morning.

“And to me, also.”  Cullen’s fingers tangled in hers for a moment before he forced himself to continue to his place at the war table.  Perhaps they had made progress after all.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last of the revised chapters. Chapter 4 will be out in the next day or so, and 5 and 6, the final chapters, within the next week. I really wanted to make sure the entire story had been well edited and finished properly. Please enjoy. I do apologize for the formatting, I'm using Google Drive, and apparently it doesn't play well with others. Comments welcomed. Thank you for reading.Comments welcomed. Thank you for reading.


	4. The Witching Hour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen had done every silly thing that his cadre of conspirators had suggested in an effort to gain Evelyn’s favor. He’d shown up at unexpected times and unlikely places just because she had been there. He’d touched her hand, her shoulder, or lower back whenever the opportunity presented itself, though it was far too rarely for his liking. To his delight, she never withdrew from him, instead, subtly leaning into him. He wondered if she knew she was doing it herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters 1-3 Have been heavily edited since April. I highly advise that you read those again before going on to chapter 4. Chapters 5-6 can be expected shortly, they're being polished right now.

Chapter Four: The Witching Hour

 

~oOo~

  


It had been some time since the Herald had called a meeting in the war room.  Nearly two weeks.  She had been gone most of that time in the Western Approach.  Things were heating up there, and she’d requested a meeting with the Advisors for first thing in the morning after her return to Skyhold.

    Cullen had done every silly thing that his cadre of conspirators had suggested in an effort to gain Evelyn’s favor.  He’d shown up at unexpected times and unlikely places just because she had been there.  He’d touched her hand, her shoulder, or lower back whenever the opportunity presented itself, though it was far too rarely for his liking.  To his delight, she never withdrew from him, instead, subtly leaning into him.  He wondered if she knew she was doing it herself.  

    But then she’d suddenly gone unplanned, out to the Western Approach and just stayed there.  Worse, she’d taken Iron Bull and Dorian with her, so he’d had no one to talk to about Evelyn.  He could have gone to Leliana, but Cullen was not as comfortable with the Spymaster.  He was a patient man.  He would wait.  It was not easy however, and he would be grateful if there could be some solution found.   Soon.

He rubbed the back of his suddenly tense neck.  Too much time had passed since the night Evelyn had killed the dragon, and Cullen hadn’t found the right moment to talk with her about how she had kissed him.  Leaving the issue unresolved made him uncomfortable in a number of ways.

    When he got to the war room, Leliana was waiting for him.  Josephine and Evelyn entered just behind him.  Evelyn glanced at him, flushed pink, then looked away.

    Leliana handed Cullen a folded bit of paper.  He took one look at her face and opened it discreetly. You dislike the Party. It read.  His eyebrows climbed as he glanced at the rogue.  He nodded and tucked the paper away.  He looked at Evelyn.  She seemed tired.  He hoped that she’d stay at Skyhold for a while, for his sake as well as her own.

 

    Evelyn had returned to Skyhold totally exhausted.  She had fallen into her bed shortly after her arrival the afternoon before.  For once, she had gotten to sleep easily and slept for twelve hours.  It hadn’t helped as much as she’d expected it would.  She felt as if she had a millstone around her neck.  There was just too much to do.  So many people who just needed a bit of help.  So many rifts with no one else to close them.  The political maneuverings alone were enough to keep her awake at night.

    She’d initially stayed away for so long in the hopes that time and distance would dull her attraction to Cullen.  That plan had proved a failure the instant she’d seen him.  The moment she’d walked into the war room, she’d been hyper aware of his every movement.  It was as if he were a fire radiating heat.  His presence was a palpable thing.  

    The Herald listened to her advisors, then gave orders to deal with several water and animal problems that needed resolution.  In addition, she needed men to build bridges to make more of the area accessible.  Cullen would set up work units to set out in the next few days to the Western Approach.  He brought up a few details around troop deployments next.  He glided around the table to stand next to Evelyn as he moved a marker.  He didn’t touch her, just stood close enough that she felt his breath on her cheek as he gave her his recommendation.

    “That sounds good, Commander.  I will defer to your judgement on this.”  Evelyn nodded in agreement.  She felt as if she should move away from him.  Being this close was too much temptation to lean in, wrap her arms around his waist, and bury her lips against the strong column of his throat.  But Leliana and Josephine might misinterpret the reason for her discomfort, and Evelyn could do without more scrutiny.

    “Last item, Inquisitor.”  Josephine handed Evelyn an engraved invitation.  “This is for a Masquerade hosted by the Lady Abelone de Cordonnier.  She is very influential in...certain circles.  The reason I bring this to you, is that there are a section of Orlesian nobles who are not acceptable at court.”  

    “So some of these nobles will be at this masquerade party?”  Evelyn sensed that there was more.

    “Yes.  There are three key, wealthy, untapped noble houses we expect will be represented at this event.  Meeting these representatives should open doors with many other houses we have been unable to ally with.”  Leliana spoke up.  “The reputation of these houses is of a more scandalous nature.  Lady de Cordonnier hosts masquerades with the express purpose of allowing her guests to...mingle in private rooms.”

    “I must be more tired than I thought.  What are you getting at?”  Evelyn felt a headache coming on.  She had been to dozens of parties where groups divided up and went into separate rooms.  She often liked the card rooms.  She could learn a great deal by watching someone play Wicked Grace or Diamondback.  A known tell was a huge benefit during negotiations.

    “It’s a sex party!”  Cullen’s voice growled very close to her ear.  It sent hot shivers down her spine.  To her horror, her spine actually curled involuntarily.  “They’re asking you to make alliances with the lowest, most scandalous, most perverted nobles in all of Orlais!”  Evelyn rounded on him in surprise at his outburst.  What had he just said?  There were quite a few words in those two sentences that she had never expected to hear coming from Cullen’s mouth.  The alpha male tone that he’d used caused her to squeeze her thighs together in unconscious response.  She blinked twice slowly, frowning before she turned to look at the other two women with disbelief.

    “You tell me all about how I need to be concerned with appearances, and you bring me this?”  She was furious.  It wasn’t like she really cared about the party as a concept.  Whatever consenting adults did in private wasn’t any of her business.  Once upon a time she would have jumped at the chance to go.  But she had been crushing her sexual nature in order to serve the needs of the Inquisition.  This was completely unreasonable.

    “I understand how it sounds when put that way.”  Josephine’s face was pink even as she glared in Cullen’s direction.  “But it is common for things of a business or political nature to be discussed in the common areas.  It is only in the private rooms in the lower floors where anything of a salacious nature occurs.”

    “In fact, Herald,”  Leliana added.  “If you didn’t know about the lower rooms, it would look like any other party.  I suggest that we allow the rumor that you will attend to leak out, but deny it officially.  This way, you can go in disguise and meet with nobles we’re seeking.  The rumor that you’re going will draw them there, if they weren’t already attending.  You get them to commit to a meeting at another time, then leave.  No one will ever be able to prove you were there.”

“The Inquisition will benefit from the added gold and influence.  Also, a bit of talk keeps us on everyone’s lips.”  The Diplomat said as she scribbled furiously on her clipboard.  “Even naughty talk is good talk, in small doses.”

“I think I might be losing my mind because that...kind of makes sense.”  Evelyn pinched the bridge of her nose.  She’d never expected anything like what she had just heard out of Josephine either.    Her whole life was all about the unexpected these days.  She sighed deeply, feeling ancient as she came to a decision.  Was she finally losing her mind?  “All right.  I’ll think about it.”

“Inquisitor!”  Cullen’s amber eyes were intense and focused on her.  She’d never seen him this upset before. “You can’t seriously be considering going to such an event!  Every man there will be attempting to sleep with the Herald of Andraste.”

“You assume that isn’t the case at every other party we send her to!”  Leliana snorted as she folded her arms in her favorite displeased gesture.

“You also assume that they are after her title and influence.  I can assure you that is not always the case.  I’ve had a number of awkward conversations with male guests who have not yet met the Inquisitor, but are wondering about the attractive redhead who is seen all over Skyhold.  Is she involved with anyone?  Does she like older men?”  Josephine added.

“I think you’d be surprised by how many men have tried to sleep with me, Commander.”  Evelyn’s teasing tone had a touch of a barb.  She held out no hope that the Commander’s concern was anything but professional.  But just as Josephine had said, even if Cullen didn’t seem interested, other men were.  Maybe she could use this to her advantage; take a vacation from her position for the night.  She smiled as she had a thought, then decided to share.  “Actually, you’d be surprised where they try to sleep with me as well.  It’s definitely not just at parties.”  She winked at him in response to his shocked expression.  Point made.

    “Taking an escort will cut down on the number of unwanted suitors.”  Josephine said in a helpful tone.  Evelyn’s smile was uncontrollable.  She moved to a chair, slouching in it in a very unladylike way.  She was definitely going to milk this situation for all it was worth.  Her physical attraction to Cullen had become a distraction she could no longer tolerate.  This party seemed like the ideal opportunity to take the edge off.  She’d had unrequited crushes before.  All she needed was some male attention and she would be back to normal.  Sort of.  It wouldn’t be the man she wanted, but...the Maker was not always kind.

    “Not only are we discussing my attendance at a sex party, A Sex Party!  We are also discussing the man that I will use as a shield while there!”  The ridiculousness of the whole affair had her giggling at intervals as she listed the candidates.  “So who will it be?  Blackwall hates nobles and can’t hide it.  Also, I don’t think I could get him to trim his beard to save his life.  Cole wouldn’t work, because of a thousand reasons starting and ending with they can’t see him.  Solas is out because he’d just never relax, and they’d treat him like a servant all night.  Iron Bull is out because I’ve been seen with a Qunari at the Winter Palace.  Also, I’ve had to tell him I wasn’t interested more than once, so taking him would send the wrong message. And Varric is famous thanks to those novels.”  She weakly waved an arm in Cullen’s direction.  He looked distinctly unhappy.  “Our dear Commander would be a distraction.  You saw how popular he was at the Winter Palace.  I’d have to be his shield instead of the other way around!”  She sighed happily, at least her headache had retreated.  She was looking forward to something!  She needed to feel desirable again.  Cullen’s indifference to her had taken it’s toll on her confidence.  But not for long!  She abandoned her chair and took a few steps toward the doors.  

“I’ll take Dorian.”  She tossed over her shoulder as she left the room.  “This is perfect for him.  He’s probably been to dozens of these ‘Masquerades’ in Minrathous.” Evelyn was still giggling as she wandered down the hallway.  She couldn’t wait to tell the Tevinter.  The look on his face would be priceless.  Cullen’s expression when she’d explained why she wouldn’t be taking him certainly had been.   

 

Cullen waited until Josephine had returned to her desk to close the door to the war room and turn to look at Leliana.  He had not had to work hard to sound like he was against the party.  He really didn’t want Evelyn to go.  He leaned on the door with his arms crossed over his chest, waiting.  The Spymaster tossed something at him.  He caught it and opened the envelope.  

“Maker, Leliana!”  Cullen waved the invitation in the air.  “What is this?”

“You were popular at the Winter Palace, Commander.  That is your very own invitation to the Masquerade.”  The Spymaster had a devious smile on her lips, the one that she got when she played the Game.  “This is your opportunity.”

“Excuse me?”  Cullen’s eyes widened.  He rubbed the back of his neck as he attempted to gather his thoughts.  Attend a sex party? This could not be happening.

“Don’t worry, Commander.  You’re in good hands.  By the night of the party, you’ll be ready to gather intelligence on your lady love.  And when the time is right, I will assist you in persuading her to accept your court.”  Leliana laughed.  This had not been the solution that Cullen had been hoping for.

 

~oOo~

 

The evening of the Masquerade, Dorian walked into the de Cordonnier Estate with a perfectly polished and anonymous Ferelden noblewoman on his arm.  The Tevinter mage wore clothes similar to the military style uniform that he had worn to the Winter Palace, but in hues of violet and silver.  Evelyn’s outfit matched his in shade, but while his clothing was tailored to perfection, hers had a clingy element.  She wore a tightly fitted bodice that finished with a knot secured with several flowered stickpins at her right shoulder.  The skirt was full to allow freedom of movement, but the light fabric seemed to be in constant motion.  Her left shoulder was bare, revealing a length of pale skin and the tops of her full breasts. The left side of her skirt parted to reveal a long stocking clad leg.

Dorian had made them special masks to help with the costume.  His changed his appearance quite dramatically.  His hair was covered, but his eyes were blue and his mustache was light brown.  Evelyn’s changes were less dramatic as she did need to make herself known to a few of the other guests.  She wore an Onyx half mask only, revealing her auburn hair which had been curled and left loose to cascade down her back and over her breasts.  The mole she had on her right cheek had been rendered invisible.  Dorian had altered her eyes in shade only, making them a deep violet.  Her makeup was a change from her bold signature look, using a lighter hand in shades of amethyst and smoke.  She wore one elbow length black glove over her left hand to cover the mark.

They paused and took in the room.  Leliana and Josephine had been right.  This looked like any other party they had been to, with the exception of the daring of the costumes worn.  The ladies wore more revealing gowns, and the men’s clothing were tailored tightly. All attendees revealing their assets in the manner of their choice.

“How do you feel?”  Dorian asked Evelyn.  She had expressed some natural nervousness on the carriage ride over.  He would take her home in a heartbeat if she indicated she was uncomfortable in any way.

“I feel...sexy.”  A slow, wicked, smile emerged over her violet painted lips.  “Let’s go get the work done so we can play.  But first, a drink.”

“Oh, Evie.”  Dorian grinned adoringly at her.  “You do know the way to my heart.”  He captured a servant’s attention who brought them wine.  When he handed hers to Evelyn, her eyes seemed all business again.  She must have seen her first target because she was already moving away from him with her back straight and shoulders square, showing off her cleavage to advantage.  Add to that the slow, gliding walk that had many eyes following the sway of her hips, she must still be feeling sexy.

“So, not all business then.” The Tevinter scanned the room.  His own target spotted, Dorian found his way over to the handsome man in black velvet and gold trim.   He looked perfect.  He also looked nervous.  There he went, doing that characteristic neck rub, again.  Luckily, it was on the agenda to discuss tells.  Dorian ordered more drinks.

 

“I think you should choose that one.” Dorian suggested some time later, when Evelyn had met the obligations that had brought her to the party.  All three ‘scandalous’ nobles had agreed to meet at a more mundane location, at a later date to discuss assistance for the Inquisition.  It had been surprisingly easy to find them all.

“Why that one?” Evelyn asked.  She’d had her eye on him herself, but she wanted to know what her friend thought.  She’d never met a better judge of hotness than Dorian.

“We discussed this, remember?  You’ve met your responsibilities for the evening.  Now you can take some time for you.  Why? You’re frustrated thanks to our dear Commander.  Out of all the men here, he looks the most like him.  Why not just pretend it’s him for the evening?  You can get him out of your system and then we can all get back work.  We can’t have your sexual needs be the reason the world ends, Love.” Dorian gestured elegantly with one hand while he made his point.

“You really agree that if I vent my sexual frustrations, I’ll be able to focus on the important things?”  There was still the matter of the Commander and his totally distracting sexiness, particularly his voice.  Was is too much to hope that the handsome man in black had a voice that would make her toes curl?  Evelyn had been in self imposed celibacy since the conclave.  She glanced at the man in question.  He was very similar to Cullen in size and build.  Clearly a soldier, he didn’t look entirely comfortable among the nobles, but he owned the space he was in.  He knew his own worth and didn’t need to prove it.  He also seemed to be waiting for something.  “What if I exacerbate my problem?”

“We’ll deal with that very specifically delightful problem if it presents itself.  I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t think that you’d benefit from the experience.  You now have the best birth control charm from my homeland, so the consequences will be minimal.  Besides, if nothing else you’ll have spent an evening with a handsome man who would love to get his hands on you.  Do with it what you will.” The Tevinter waved his hand in a dismissive gesture.

“What makes you so sure that one will want to get his hands on me?”  Evelyn looked away from the topic of discussion as she took a sip of her drink.

“He’s turned down everyone who has approached him; men and women both.  And he’s been watching you all evening.  He’s looking over here right now, in fact.”  Dorian smiled.  “Good luck, Love.”  He disappeared almost instantly.  Evelyn turned to look for him, surprised.

“Lose something?”  A warm shiver traveled down Evelyn’s spine at the sound of the man’s voice.  A rich, deep timbre with a Ferelden accent caressed her ears.  Maker, she must have lost her mind, because he even sounded a bit like Cullen.   She braced herself for the impact of his sexiness up close.  

“I did,”  Evelyn turned to look at the owner of that silky voice.  He was even more devastating than she had anticipated in an Obsidian half mask.  She fiddled with her drink to cover her sudden rush of adrenaline.  “But I seem to have found something else to hold my attention.  A little bird told me you’ve been breaking hearts left and right.  Why are you here, Soldier?”  She turned to move to a small round table that had a curved bench on either side.  She smiled inwardly when he followed closely and chose to share her bench, rather than sit across from her.

“I’m here on an adventure.”  Her soldier slid close enough that their knees were touching.  “I really don’t know how I got talked into coming here...although, suddenly I’m very glad I did.”

    “Suddenly I’m very glad you did, as well.”  Evelyn smiled as she studied her companion.  He had curly dark hair and pale blue eyes.  He was clean shaven, but his square jaw clearly could grow a heavy beard if he chose.  He wore the military style formal dress favored by most of the men in attendance, but he wore it like he belonged in it.  He wore a black velvet dress jacket with gold trim.  The fabric clung to him in a way that made her fingers jealous.  She found herself fascinated by the gold buttons.  She wondered if they would slip through the expensive fabric sensuously and easily; or would the buttonholes be tight, require a bit of force, delaying her access to his wide chest.

“Why are you here, my Lady?”  The Soldier asked.  There were just a suggestion of dimples bracketing his perfect mouth.  Lips that were full and expressive now had a shy smile that she wanted to kiss away.  She had never expected to feel so attracted to a complete stranger, but logically, this situation wasn’t all that different from her quick romances with Templars back in Ostwick Circle.  This man was different from all of them.  He seemed...safe, as if perhaps she could trust him with her genuine self, her body’s natural reactions and needs.  Perhaps he was someone she could trust with her deepest, darkest, passionate desires, without being judged.

“I was invited for business.  That being done, I am going to enjoy the food and wine of my host, and the company of a deliciously handsome soldier.”  Evelyn’s tone was suggestive.  His mask did nothing to hide the flush that crept over his neck and cheeks.  She was delighted when she realized that he had to be telling her the truth.  No one who frequented these parties would be blushing at just being called handsome. She loved feeling like this.  Bold.  Decadent.  Fearless.

“I can’t help but wonder why such a lovely lady would choose to spend this time in my company? I think you could have any man present.” Her Soldier’s eyes scanned the room.  Evelyn followed his gaze.  There were, indeed quite a few men and women both glancing in their direction.  She was sure, however, that he was underestimating how many pairs of those eyes were drawn to him, not to her.

“Tonight, I have shed my burdens.  The rest of my evening belongs to me.  Whatever I do for the rest of the night is only about what I want.  I don’t want just any man here.  I want you.”  She slid her hand over his knee under the table.  She felt the muscle quiver as she trailed her fingertips up his inner thigh. “Make me a deal.  You and I tonight.  No names, no promises, no games.  Just two people finding some freedom in the dark.”

“I will treasure anything you care to offer me tonight.”  Her Soldier seemed a bit nervous, but more importantly, eager.  “Before...”  He cleared his throat and seemed about to reach for the back of his head before he stopped himself.  He stood and held out his hand. “Before anything else happens, will you do me the honor of sharing a dance with me?  I’ve been wanting to dance with you ever since I saw you this evening.”

    “Of course.”  Evelyn placed her hand in his.  He was just what she needed.  Her Soldier led her to the dance floor.  A melody began to play and she realized what the music was.  It was known as the Antivan Tango.  The passion and emotion of the music were expected to be expressed by even the most amateur dancers. The spirit of the dance was more important than the steps, but Evelyn would need to be aware of her Soldier’s body in a way that would leave her wet and aching for him at the end.

    As her Soldier pulled her into his embrace, one hand on her back and the other holding her hand, she looked up into the eyes of the man in front of her.  She was taller than most women, so it was rare Evelyn had to look up at anyone.  He was tall enough that she might have to stand on her toes to reach his lips.  She looked at his mouth briefly; it was so perfect.  She allowed everything else to fade away.  There was no Herald, no Inquisition, no war.  In that moment for her, there was only Evelyn and her Soldier.  He told her what he would do next with cues from his body that she found effortless to follow.  There was nothing else required of her, not in that one moment.  She was free.

    They glided around the dance floor in a large circle, movements quick and graceful, knees and ankles hooking and intertwining.  There were intricate turns, slow slides of thigh against thigh, feet sliding, always touching, her breasts pressed tightly against him, her head tucked under his chin.  She had never danced this close with anyone.  

Her Soldier twirled Evelyn away from him, where she teased a persistent suitor from earlier in the evening with a coy smile and a flick of her skirt.  Her partner tugged her hand and she turned back to him, her back to his front, his right hand low over her belly, pressing her hips to his.  His other hand slid down her torso, grazing her breast.  His hands were firm and strong as he guided her back against his chest, lips so close they shared breath, while they glided over the dance floor.   She heard the music build and felt his body tense for what he had planned.  Her heart nearly stopped as he lifted her, turning around several times to the applause of those present.  

Evelyn looked into his eyes as he slowly allowed her to slide down his body until her feet touched the floor.  The music was coming to a close.  She hooked her knee over his hip as she pressed her entire body close to his.   He held her leg in place, long fingers caressing the delicate skin behind her knee.  The slit in her dress fell away from her thigh in a dramatic drape of fabric and color.  The music had ended, but he seemed reluctant to release her.  

In the silence the hand at her knee slipped through the gap in her skirt, tracing the lace at the top of her stocking, fingertips brushing bare thigh.  He did not stop, his large hand continued to leave a blazing path along her skin as he cupped her ass over her lacy smallclothes.  His boldness surprised and delighted her.  They were breathing hard, and it was most definitely not all from the dance.  She never would have suspected her Soldier to be able to dance like that!

    “You must take that woman off to a private room and ravish her this instant!”  commented an Antivan accented voice.  “After that performance there must be ravishing!  Everyone!  Grab someone and ravish them!”  Her Soldier quirked an eyebrow at her in question.  Her belly fluttered.  This was one of those moments.  One that changed everything.

    “Carry me off and ravish me, Soldier.”  Evelyn ordered.  Her breath caught at the look of fierce joy on the visible part of his face.  His grin was devastatingly perfect. Her heart pounded in anticipation.  She was in trouble.  So much sexy trouble.  She licked her lips in anticipation.

“As you wish, my Lady.”  He brushed a thumb over her lips as if contemplating kissing her right there in front of everyone.  Her Soldier shook his head as if reminding himself of something.  He pulled her gently over his shoulder.  His long strides carried them down to the lower levels quickly, but not fast enough for Evelyn to miss the round of applause and scattered catcalls that accompanied their exit.

In just moments, her Soldier had chosen an empty room and slammed the door shut.  He did not put her down until he had assured himself of the security of the door.  He put Evelyn on her feet right in front of the door.  He crowded her with his body, crushing her breasts against his chest like they had been while they were dancing.

“I find the suggestion of ravishing you to be very appealing.”  Her Soldier groaned before his mouth captured hers.  He kissed like he danced.  It was all raw passion and boundless enthusiasm, barely leashed by years of military discipline.  She felt the tension in his body as she wound her arms around his neck.  Her fingers tunneled into his curly hair, drawing a moan from him as she caressed his head and neck.  She wanted him to let all that tension go.

“Don’t hold back with me.”  Evelyn pulled away from his lips to look into his face so that he could see how earnestly she meant what she was about to say.  “I am not some soft noblewoman who sits around her estate doing needlepoint.  I will not break if you allow yourself to be free with me.”  His eyes searched hers.  He seemed satisfied by what he found there, so she was surprised when his kissed her again with lips as gentle as a whisper.

“You humble me, my Lady.”  His voice held layers of meaning that her brain was  incapable of thinking about right then.  Especially since that gentle brush quickly became a passionate exploration of mouths and bodies, lips and hands working together, exploring and learning in tandem.  When they could no longer breathe, her Soldier pulled away from her to attempt to get her out of her dress.

“It must come off...” her Soldier grumbled as he tried to find the fastenings.  His hands skimmed her body everywhere the dress covered.  She took one of his hands and guided it up to the shoulder of her gown.  His fingers were hot where they touched her skin as he brushed the fabric of her dress off her shoulder.  There were no fastenings.  Her dress, once no longer anchored as designed, slipped to her feet in a puddle of fabric. She was left in matching black smallclothes, stockings, and the elbow length glove on her left arm. Wrapping his arms around her waist he lifted her, kissing her again as he moved further into the semi darkness.  A huge bed dominated the room.  There was other furniture, but in the intimacy of the moment, Evelyn didn’t care about anything other than the featured piece.  

“Undress me.”  Her Soldier smiled as he placed her on her feet next to the bed.  Evelyn’s smile matched his as she raised her hands to the simple gold buttons that held his jacket closed.  The fabric was buttery soft and the buttons were opened quickly under her fingers.  She sighed happily as she slid her hands under the black velvet.  She pushed the fabric over his shoulders, tossing it somewhere out of her vision.  She pulled his shirt over his head and it went a different direction.  She traced her hands over his shoulders, pectorals, teasing his nipples with little flicks of her fingertips.  She delighted in his shivery response.  

Evelyn’s fingers trailed down the center of his firmly cut chest and abdomen on her way to the buckle at his belt.  His respiratory rate climbed the closer she got to her goal.  She glanced at the set of his mouth and realized he was still holding himself back.   She had to get him out of his own head, he was overthinking things.   She shoved him onto the bed.  He did not resist her, falling with his knees and feet still off the bed.  His boots and her strappy heels came off and were discarded.  Her Soldier watched her with an intensity that made her feel empowered and sexy, but most of all, hungry.  

 

Cullen watched as Evelyn made short work of his belt and pants.  He lifted his hips to help her, and then he was naked except for his smalls.  Evelyn brushed her hands across his erection over the underclothes.  He moaned as she climbed over him, her knees on either side of his hips.  He arched his hips, pressing his erection against her sex.  She sighed before leaning over to find his mouth.  Her kiss was a tease.  She nipped at him, not quite meeting his mouth like before.  She made an amused sound when he tried to deepen the kiss.

“You’re not undressed yet, Soldier.”  Evelyn smirked as she kissed along his jaw, trailing her mouth over his neck and chest.  She paused at his nipples, sucking each one into her mouth, flicking it with her tongue until he was actively twitching with excitement.  She worked her way down Cullen’s abdomen, stopping just short of his smalls.  She knelt between his knees.  Auburn hair spilled over his thighs and tickled his belly.  He brushed away the strands that were blocking his view, but delighted in the feel of her hair silky brushing his skin.  

Cullen’s blood was rushing through his veins faster than in combat.  Her hands and mouth were pushing his control to the limit.  He had always prided himself on his strength of will.  He had battled demons and mages, his own addiction, and corruption in the templars, but never had he come so close to completely losing control than when Evelyn tugged off his smalls and wrapped her fist around his cock.

“Maker’s Breath!”  His breath was coming fast, belly rising and falling as he watched Evelyn’s hand move gently up and down the length of his shaft.  She licked her lips, looking into his eyes as she rolled back his foreskin and touched her tongue to the tip, swirling around as if licking a treat.  He groaned loudly, struggling to hold still.  He would do anything if she would just not stop what she was doing.  Her violet lips closed over him, encompassing the entire head and hollowing her cheeks before moving up and down the length of his shaft in slow, steady strokes.   He slid his hand into her hair, caressing her scalp and gently encouraging her to continue.

It was delicious torment.  Every time he felt like he was about to orgasm, Evelyn changed the tempo of her strokes, or shifted her position.  The minx would bring him close, but never quite finish him.  She cupped his balls, rolling them gently, tugging his sac.  The glove covering her mark added a silky slide that made his eyes roll back in his head.  Cullen opened his mouth to speak when he felt something familiar.  The tingle of magic?  Her mouth became hotter than it could have been naturally.  The sensation was amazing.  She alternated hot and cold in her mouth, once again bringing him close to the edge.  Then she pulled out all the stops.  She applied all these techniques at once; mouth sucking on the head, one hand sliding on his shaft and the other gloved hand, teasing his balls, and finally, waves of hot and cold assaulting his senses until his control completely shattered.  

Cullen’s hand in Evelyn’s hair tightened.  He thrust into her mouth.  She moved faster, her wet mouth and tongue working his cock relentlessly.  How many times had he dreamed about having her just like this?  He could hold himself back no longer, he began fucking her mouth in earnest.  She moaned around him, the vibrations sending him over the edge.  Hand tangled in her hair, he held her as he spilled into her mouth with a shout.  She continued to work him, swallowing, prolonging his orgasm.  He collapsed against the bed, stunned.  He’d never felt anything like that before.

“Now you’re undressed.”  Evelyn smirked up at him.  She looked very satisfied with herself.  He realized she had driven him to lose his control on purpose!  He reached for her, pulling her onto the bed and into his arms.  Her lips were swollen and her face was flushed.  She’d told him to be free with her; there would be no more holding back.  He kissed her again. He tasted himself on her lips, and suddenly he couldn’t think anymore.  

“So I am.”  Cullen’s gaze raked over Evelyn’s body, followed by his hands.  There was too much covering her.  “You, however, are overdressed, and I do mean to ravish you.”  His hands moved to the fabric covering her breasts.  Not finding a convenient catch, he ripped it open.  He heard a gasp from her as he palmed her breasts. They were full and pillowy with large pink nipples.  He cupped both of them, fingers plucking the tips, holding her breasts together so that could move his lips from one nipple to another as quickly as possible.  She’d gotten him so very hard again so very quickly.  She was writhing under him by the time he had slipped his hand under the lacy smallclothes she was wearing and found her clit.  “Maker!  You are so wet, so ready for me.”

 

Evelyn’s body jerked in pleasure when her Soldier parted the folds of her pussy and pressed firmly against her clit.  She had never been more wet than she was right now with this man.  Her Soldier’s reaction to her teasing had been everything she had hoped for.  He had ripped off her bra!  She had similar hopes that her panties wouldn’t survive the encounter either.  They had been a set after all.  

“This. Must. Go.”  Her Soldier grunted as he used his large hands to grip the delicate fabric and tear it away from her hips.  She was bare to his gaze for a long moment before he dove between her thighs and buried his face in her pussy.  He assaulted her with his mouth, his lips and tongue working her clit relentlessly until she reached her orgasm, screaming.  Then he slipped a finger inside her did it again.  And again.  Evelyn’s pale skin was dotted with sweat, her body weak from the pleasure.   

He got onto his knees and pulled her closer to him on the bed.  He lined himself up with her entrance and pressed himself within her in one slow, smooth stroke.  They both sighed in pleasure as they joined together.  She marveled at the feel of him inside her as he held himself still.  Then she squirmed underneath him, unable to wait for him to move.

“You feel so good around me.  Maker!  When you squeeze me...Ah!  Like that...”  He held her thighs wide apart, his alpha male posture plucking a deep desire chord within her.  One of his fingers circled her clit again, as he began to slowly move inside her, drawing gasps from Evelyn.  Her Soldier loomed over her as he picked up his pace.  He fucked her hard, his intense gaze on her as she was overcome again.  She watched his face as her most recent orgasm took her over the edge.  His eyes closed as she squeezed around him, his head tipped back, body perfectly formed and glistening.  It was an image she would never forget.  He looked almost as if he were giving divine thanks.  It was unbelievably sexy.

“Yes, yes!”  Evelyn ground out as her Soldier switched his grip to her hips.  This angle changed something and his cock hit something inside her that made her orgasm again and with more force than before.  She knew that whatever control her Soldier had left was gone completely when he drove into her over and over, his movements more erratic until he drove them both to one final, screaming peak.  He spilled himself inside her, panting as he placed a reverent kiss on her chest over her heart.  

 

    Cullen was looking for his jacket much, much, later.  Evelyn had tossed it somewhere during their foreplay.  She had finished dressing and was watching him.  Her body was loose and relaxed, but he could see the shadow that crossed the visible part of her face.  She was sad that their time was over.  He was too.  As much as he had hopes that they could come to some sort of understanding eventually, it would never be like this again.  He found his prize behind an overstuffed chair and put it on.  She stepped up to him, folding the edges over each other.

“I’m going take this button.”  Evelyn’s smile was genuine as she buttoned up his jacket for him.  She fried the attaching threads with a tiny puff of magic before tucking her prize between her breasts.

“What?  Why?”  He fingered the spot where the button had lived previously.  It was the one right at his collar.  It would be painfully obvious that it was missing.

“A trophy of my conquest, of course.”  Her grin was spectacularly naughty.

“I won’t be able to close my collar...everyone will know that I...that we...”  After all the things they had done, Cullen wondered, as many times as they had done them, how could she still make him stammer like a schoolboy?  He resisted the urge to rub the back of his neck.  Dorian had called it a ‘tell.’

“They already know that.”  She pointed out.  “You’re not the one who will be going home with no smallclothes.  Fortunately for you, the woman I need to get back to being is pretty good at saving the day.”  Evelyn took one of the pins she had used to decorate the shoulder of her dress and used it to secure his collar in place of the button she took.  She stepped back and admired her work.  The pin was a flower with petals of onyx with a ruby center.  She had given him a token as well.  He loved it, especially since it was also in the colors of the Inquisition.  “That looks quite nice, actually.”

“You could stay.”  He ventured, pulling her into his arms. “I know that we agreed to enjoy this time together and ask nothing else.  But if you ask me, I will tell you my name.  I will tell you anything, my Lady.”  He didn’t know what he would do next if she took him up on his offer, but he felt the need to make it all the same.  Whatever happened, he wanted her to know that letting her walk away would not be easy for him.  His mask suddenly felt heavy.  

“Thank you.  Thank you for...everything, but...”  Evelyn moved to the door, but hesitated with her hand on the doorknob. “I want you to know that if I didn’t have to be who I need to be, I would be very eager to stay.”  She rushed back to him, threw her arms around his neck and kissed him fiercely before rushing out the door with a whispered, “Goodbye, my Soldier.”

  
~oOo~


	5. Darkest Just Before...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You know you can’t have him.” The seductive voice had whispered at odd times as she fought through the demons of the fade. “The one Templar you would keep...and he doesn’t want you. It’s quite ironic, really. He only cares about his duty. Did you really think he could love you after what he has suffered at the hands of mages? He will never see you as anything other than just another potential abomination. You can continue to pretend, Inquisitor...and you have pretended haven’t you? But you are only fooling yourself. You don’t get to have the one man you would do anything to keep.”

Chapter Five: Darkest Just Before...

 

~oOo~

 

Dorian was waiting for Evelyn at their planned meeting spot near the entrance to the estate.  He was lounging against a pillar with a glass of wine in his hand, fending off the advances of a number of randy dowagers.  He’d passed on a number of propositions from delicious men as well, and though he had been tempted, he couldn’t get past the feeling that each one was somehow lacking.  It was probably the horns.  All this time and it was still hard to admit how strongly he felt about the Qunari.  Damn, he was getting as bad as Evie.

“Dorian,”  The Inquisitor grinned when she saw him. He removed himself carefully from the flirty noblewomen to escort Evelyn to the carriage.  He was dying to know how the evening had gone after he’d seen Cullen carry her off for what he hoped had been a fantastic romantic interlude.  He allowed her to relax all the way back to the small house the Inquisition rented in the capital before he began the interrogation.  

“So?  Overall impressions?”  He was more pleased with himself than he would like to admit.  Finally getting his friend her heart’s desire, even if she didn’t know it, was delightful.

“It was marvelous,”  she said as Dorian led the way to the parlor area and chose a padded chair to sink into.  “He was familiar with magic.  He didn’t even blink when I used my magic on him.”  

“The electricity?”  Dorian gasped.  “That’s...adventurous for a first encounter.”

“No, just a touch of hot and cold.” she smiled.

“Oh, Love. That may be my favorite trick!  What did he do?” Dorian asked. He was a bit surprised the former templar hadn’t even twitched when Evelyn used her magic during sex.  Cullen truly understood how dangerous that could be better than most.  Dorian smiled, thinking of the trust the Commander had demonstrated in light of some of his previous experience with mages.

“Moaned with pleasure of course.  I had to get him to stop thinking, and then, he gave me...lots of wonderful memories.  It was practically perfect.”  Evelyn smiled a little sadly.  “It would have been perfect if it really had been who I pretended it was.  But it was nice while it lasted.  I’ll use the memory to hold me over while I suffer a return to celibacy.”

“No plans to meet with him another time then?” Dorian asked.  That would make things easier.  Getting Cullen and Evelyn together was turning out to be more frustrating than his own love life.  He thought about those horns again...and conquering.  He flushed, consciously taking a deep breath.

“He offered to tell me his name.”  Evelyn looked breathless as well.  She closed her eyes for a moment as if savoring the memory.  If her face were any indication it was a good one.

“But you told him no,”  Dorian guessed.  Would she have really considered running away with a mid level soldier in a fit of romantic angst?   Never.  She had obviously flirted with the idea, though.  He knew Evelyn was a true believer.  She really thought that somehow, even if indirectly, Andraste had chosen Evelyn the mage from Ostwick to save Thedas.  

“I told him that if I didn’t have to be who I have to be, that I would have taken him up on his offer.”  She answered.  She didn’t look at the other mage, even avoided his gaze when he moved to catch her eye.

“Would you have?”  He asked, already knowing the answer.  He needed to hear her say it as much as it needed to be said.  

“Yes.”  She whispered the word with regret and longing, like she wished she’d said it to her Soldier, instead of the required refusal.

“I’m surprised.”  Dorian admitted.  He couldn’t help but be impressed by Cullen’s execution of the task at hand.  The Tevinter knew he had to help Evie and Cullen get dressed in matching jewelry.  They were both decent sorts, and if anyone deserved to have a little bit of happy in the mess they were forced to live in, it was them.  She was a believer, but she was willing to give up something beautiful and rare on faith.  For the first time, Dorian found that he believed too. He was best friends with the Herald of Andraste, but she didn’t have to end up a martyr.  He was one of many who would see this story had a far less fiery denouement.  

“I was as well.  He was compelling,” Evelyn sighed.  “When I met him, I felt as if something special could happen between us, and it did.  But he’s not the man I fell in love with.  I don’t get to have either of them.  And my Soldier deserves to be more than someone else’s stand in.”

   

~oOo~

   

    Cullen stood with Leliana and Josephine in the war room, waiting for Evelyn to arrive.  It had been five days since the Masque, and she had just arrived back from Val Royeaux late the night before.  He had taken just two days to return to Skyhold, but Evelyn had some spent some extra time in the city.

    Ever since he and Evelyn had made love, Cullen had been able to think of little else.  He had sufficient experience with women to know that what they had shared had been special.  Her response to his touch had been passionate and without reservation.    It had been all that he could have wanted and more.  She did things with her mouth that would make an Antivan blush!  They’d done things together that he’d only ever heard about in late night tales from from the barracks.  He groaned, shifting his weight to make room in his pants for his impending erection.  He would have to handle that on his own later, again.  He hadn’t taken himself in hand so often since puberty.  

As difficult as it would be to see Evelyn again, and have her still not know of his feelings, he’d much rather have it this way than the way they had been going before.  He knew what he was missing now,  and he didn’t want to be without her for long.  Leliana urged caution, but the Inquisition was getting ready to take on the demon Grey Warden army that had entrenched itself in Adamant Fortress.  Casualties would be heavy.  The Inquisitor would be at the heart of the fighting, and despite rumors to the contrary, even she was not immortal.  

He heard footsteps coming down the hall.  The door opened.  He put on his ‘Commander’ face so that he wouldn’t grin like he had been for most of the last five days.  It hadn’t gone unnoticed by his friends or his soldiers.  He’d heard that speculation as to the cause of the Commander’s sudden change in demeanor was rampant.

“Hello everyone.”  Evelyn greeted them all with warm smiles.  She seemed to be happy and relaxed; though not as relaxed as she had been after a few hours in his bed.  He allowed a smirk to escape.  Evelyn saw him, looked away, and blushed.  She always did that when he smiled at her.  Perhaps he should do it more often.  “Shall we get to it?”

“As you say, Herald.”  Josephine began the meeting by handing in reports regarding various diplomatic efforts.  Cullen took his own turn, reporting on the Western Approach improvements and other troop movements.  He managed to get through it without grabbing Evelyn and kissing her breathless, but just...barely.  He had been unable to stop himself from circling around the table, standing very close as he spoke with her in his softest tone.  Leliana frowned at him before she went next with a number of reports from spies in both Orlesian and Ferelden noble houses.  The spymaster finished by pulling out a piece of paper that looked like it hadn’t been opened since it’s arrival by crow.

    “This was handed to me as I was coming in.  It has an emblem on it from an old friend.  You remember Zevran?  We did a number of operations with him a while ago.  I’ve heard he’s been around since we helped him escape the Crows.  I’m sure this will be interesting.”  Leliana opened the rolled up paper.

    “Read it out loud, Leliana.”  Evelyn urged.  The others agreed.  They had all shared laughs over previous missives from the former Crow.  “I loved reading Zevran’s reports before.  He was hilarious.”

    “Very well,”  Leliana pried the last fold open and began reading.

“My dearest Lady Nightingale,

 

    I was in Val Royeaux on business when I heard the most intriguing rumor involving your Herald of Andraste.  I was rather surprised to hear that the Inquisitor herself would be attending a masquerade hosted by none other than the notorious Lady Abelone de Cordonnier.  I thought, surely such a divine and respected individual would never attend such a scandalous event.  I was curious enough to visit the de Cordonnier estate on the appointed evening only to spot more than one of your people observing the occasion.  I assumed that you were gathering intelligence to tweak the nose of your enemies, so I was caught off guard when I saw a woman who looked a great deal like your Inquisitor.  She was fending off the advances of some horribly unattractive troll when I first spotted her.

At first I thought it could never actually be her.  I’ve only seen her from a distance, after all.  Up close, even the mask could not hide her loveliness.  I was surprised at this...I had heard stories of her beauty, but...you know better than most how stories distort things.  My part in several tales seem to have come out to sound less glamourous and sexy than it actually was. Surely you remember those days?  But I digress...Have you heard how popular ‘Herald’ or ‘Inquisitor’ whores are these days?  I thought perhaps she was a very expensive prostitute.  I was disabused of that notion when I attempted to seduce her.  She turned me down.  Several times.  I could only assume that she must be desperately in love with some handsome devil.  

The devil in question danced like a noble playboy, though it was clear he was a military man.  By the time they were finished, they had every observer panting with desire.  I suggested that he carry the ‘Inquisitor’ off and ravish her.  I can only assume that some ravishing happened.  I didn’t see them for the rest of the evening, and he did carry her off, Avaar-style.

Do tell your Herald that I am available to comfort her if things don’t work out with that soldier, or even if they do!  She has a wicked looking mouth and fantastic bosoms.  He was nothing to sneeze at either.

 

Yours Always,

 

Zevran Ariani.”  Leliana stopped speaking.  

“He carried you off like an Avvar barbarian?” Josephine gushed before she quickly put her diplomatic face back on with a blush.  She scribbled furiously on her clipboard.  

“That was certainly...colorful.”  Cullen rubbed the back of his neck, turning to cool his face in the draft that still blew through the room.  His heart stopped when he heard Evelyn start to speak.

“So much for being low key.”  Evelyn’s face was quite pink.  He watched her firm up her shoulders as her mouth settled in a determined line.  “This time, I don’t care.  I just...Do...Not...Care.  I had a delightful time with another consenting adult.  What may or may not have happened between myself and an incredibly sexy man is no one’s business but my own.  And Josie?  Please write down my Official Response if anyone asks.  Ready?  He had the most beautiful penis I have ever had the joy of seeing.  Got that?  I lost count of the orgasms I experienced over the several hours he spent pleasuring me in ways he must have learned from a desire demon.  Ok?  I would totally let him eat crackers in bed.  Excellent!  Good meeting.”  Evelyn clapped her hands to indicate she was finished and opened the door, gliding down the hall in a dignified manner.

“Maker!”  Cullen couldn’t help laughing at the ridiculousness of the entire situation.  He was so relieved!  That could have gone sideways so fast.  He needed to talk to her alone, like when they played chess!  It was when he felt the most comfortable with her.  He could tell her how he felt over their next chess game.  He turned to Josephine, leaning over the war table as he lifted an eyebrow in challenge.  “I dare you to put that on the record.”

“Not even if you dropped me in a dragon nest...”  the Diplomat deadpanned.  “But I did record it for posterity.  Just in case we need to refer to anything...”  

“Josie!”  Leliana bumped Josephine with her hip.  She folded her arms over her chest in her most intimidating manner as she frowned at Cullen.  “Feeling cocky, Commander?”

“Interesting choice of words...”  Cullen’s smile was huge.  He had a lot of new information to think on later.  

“She did turn down Zevran.”  Josephine added, never looking up from her writing.  Cullen couldn’t help but wonder what she was writing now.

“Maybe just a little bit.” He admitted.  Any man would be feeling confident if he’d just heard what Cullen had.  Maybe he could go talk to Evelyn right now...

“Therein lies danger.”  Leliana warned.  Cullen felt instantly deflated.  But not defeated.  The chess game was the wiser choice, but they weren’t going to have one again until after Adamant.  He didn’t want to wait that long.

 

~oOo~

 

    “Well, shit.”  Evelyn said, after she had escaped to the solitude of her tower.  She leaned up against the closed door as her knees weakened.  That letter!  And what she had said afterwards!  That had been so like the Evelyn of Ostwick and not the Herald of Andraste.  At least she felt she would still be able to be friends with Cullen.  He didn’t seem to hate her for enjoying the party even after he had protested her going.  It was too bad he hadn’t been at the party.  Perhaps under different circumstances...but that opportunity was past.  The good news was she’d made him laugh.  That had been different.  He had been different.  Perhaps she should seek him out after Adamant.  In the meantime, she needed to focus on the task at hand.  She folded those feelings away in the back of her head.  Now she could cuddle up in one of Cullen’s pilfered shirts and sleep.

 

~oOo~

 

    Cullen had tried to see Evelyn that evening, but she had gone to her rooms and given orders not to be disturbed short of a rift opening in the courtyard.  Frustrated, and with little to do now that the army was heading out first thing in the morning, he stopped by the stable and gave orders to have his horse ready after breakfast.  He could try to catch the Herald and ride with her.  Surely throughout the day, he would be able to find a time to speak with her of personal matters.  He disliked having his attention divided between the woman he cared about, and the army he was duty bound to care for.

    The next morning, Cullen had settled his mind.  He would do everything he could to win the battle and earn Evelyn’s favor.  In his mind, these goals were no longer pulling his attention in two directions, after all, it was her army.  He had always done his duty, and when the Maker had dropped the Herald into their midst that duty had taken on a divine luster.  Now, with his feelings for Evelyn, he had a personal stake in the fight like never before.  He was more determined than ever to come back alive, and he had to do all he could make sure she did too.

    It took a week to march the army to the Approach.  During that time, Cullen did not see Evelyn at all.  She had ridden ahead to remove the dragon that flew the desert skies with Blackwall, Cassandra, and Varric.  The rest of those she often took on her field team were riding with the army as reinforcements.  Dorian and Iron Bull rode with Cullen most of the way.  It was good that they had, because their constant bickering like an old married couple had kept his spirits up.

    Cullen often sat with them at the fire, trading war stories.  Iron Bull’s were the best because he would claim something improbable, Dorian would call him something horrible, then they’d stare at each other in frustration for a minute before starting all over again.  Their interactions were quite hilarious on the surface, but as time passed, Cullen saw that there was a thread of fear, just underneath.  They had been going at it for some time that last night before they were due to attack Adamant when Cullen had just had enough.

    “Maker’s Breath, you two!”  Cullen used the same tone of voice he used with his soldiers to make sure they were listening.  “Just get a tent!  Everyone knows you’re together!  You’re not hiding it very well.  Dorian, no one here is going to judge you because you like men.  But I will judge you if you keep pushing away someone who loves you.  You know how hard it has been for me to try to connect with Evelyn.  And the man you love is right there, next to you.  The only thing keeping you apart is you.”

    Dorian and Iron Bull said nothing.  They looked at each other, and Cullen could see the deep feelings the two shared.  Iron Bull’s one dark eye ran over Dorian’s face, lingering.  Bull’s hand twitched as if he wanted to take his lover’s hand, but was unsure what reaction he would receive.  It was the most vulnerable Cullen had ever seen the Qunari.  Dorian’s throat worked, and he seemed about to say something, but reached for Iron Bull’s hand instead.  He led the giant man off to his tent and they disappeared inside.  Cullen was surprised and relieved.  They were his friends, and he wanted them to be happy.  He looked up at the stars and thought of Evelyn.  She’d sent a messenger letting them know she had cleared the way for them, and would arrive first thing in the morning.  He would get to see her before the battle, but there would not be enough time for more than that.  His own happy ending would have to wait.

 

~oOo~

 

    Evelyn was anxious the morning before the battle at Adamant.  She had only five minutes to speak with Cullen to confirm their tactical plan and then the trebuchets had begun their attack.  It had been nice to connect with him, however briefly.  He had told her to be safe, then brushed a strand of hair from her cheek with his gloved fingers before turning away to face his men.  Her Commander had ordered the assault and looked good doing it.  As he had promised, Cullen opened the door for her and she waded in.

    She fought her way through the fortress, saving as many Grey Wardens as she could.  She had chosen to take Blackwall, Cassandra and Varric with her because of all the close fighting she anticipated.  Evelyn wanted the dwarf on crowd control, and the two sword and shield using warriors in front of him.  She preferred to wade in at the front, and use her barrier to soak the damage while she carved through her enemies with her spirit blade.  It had been a good plan, but the fate of all good plans were the same; they never survived contact with the enemy.

    She was guiltily grateful that she had left her best friend behind as the archdemon crumbled the bridge.  They were falling.  The Herald of Andraste felt the wind rush past her face, but it reminded her of the gentle brush of Cullen’s gloved hand against her cheek.  She reacted instinctively, opening the rift.

 

    Cullen saw Evelyn fighting on the battlements.  She had dressed in Inquisition black and red battlemage gear, with heavily armored arms and legs.  She did not wear the mage hood, but a full helm to protect her face.  She was lit by fire and magic, her spirit blade carving a path through the foot soldiers.  She looked every inch the Knight Enchanter, like those of legend.  He realized that either his soldiers’ tales and official reports were wrong, or the Inquisitor had been holding back.  She glowed like the divinely blessed creature she was.  She drew the eye as if she were being followed by a spotlight, and in her wake, the troops fought harder.  She was a blur as she cut through the enemies in front of her.  Soon, the tide had turned, and he lost sight of her as she moved deeper into the fortress.

    Cullen was giving orders to secure the area and accept the surrender of any Grey Wardens who would take the offer when a messenger staggered up to him and Knight-Captain Rylen looking quite ill.

    “What is it?”  Rylen asked.  Cullen waited.  He was terrified of the answer.  Perhaps if it was never said out loud, it would never be truly real.

    “The Inquisitor, Ser.” the messenger gasped.  “The lead team fell into the chasm when the structure collapsed.  One of the men said he saw the Herald open a rift and they all fell into it.  But that is all we know, Ser.”  

Cullen’s stomach rebelled.  It was real.

 

~oOo~

 

Evelyn and her team did escape from the fade, but it had cost them the life of Stroud, the most senior Grey Warden in Orlais.  She invited the Wardens that had survived to join the Inquisition; she felt that there was still something to save there.  After the battle she had only checked in with Knight-Captain Rylen briefly before she dragged herself into her tent to rest.  She had only done that because he’d had to show her where it had been set up.  She was exhausted, and the demon had known right where to attack her emotional stability.  She’d tried to block out the deep voice of the demon, but it had seemed to burrow into her skull.

**“You know you can’t have him.”**  The seductive voice had whispered at odd times as she fought through the demons of the fade. **“The one Templar you would keep...and he doesn’t want you.  It’s quite ironic, really.  He only cares about his duty.  Did you really think he could love you after what he has suffered at the hands of mages?  He will never see you as anything other than just another potential abomination.  You can continue to pretend, Inquisitor...and you have pretended haven’t you?  But you are only fooling yourself.  You don’t get to have the one man you would do anything to keep.”**

“The Fade take you.”  Evelyn said to her empty tent as she drifted off to sleep, but the voice continued to whisper to her in her dreams.

 

Cullen set his tent up next to the Inquisitor’s, and made sure no others were within earshot.  He hadn’t even had a moment to speak with her after the battle ended, though he had seen her from a distance so he knew she was really alive.  Varric had told them what had happened in the Fade. He had been visibly shaken by the experience.  How powerful had that demon had to have been to burrow into their minds, find their worst fear and use it against them?  He wanted to be close.  He knew from personal experience that once the demons got into your head, it was very difficult to get those voices out again.  He settled down to sleep, waking just a few hours later to noises from the tent next door.  He slipped on a pair of drawstring pants and left his bedroll.

Cullen dashed into Evelyn’s tent to find her struggling against nothing in her sleep.  She seemed to be deep into a nightmare, actively crying and shuddering in her bedroll.  He reached for her, pulling her loosely into his arms in attempt to soothe her.  She buried her face in his neck, clutching him as if she were terrified.  Her sobs diminished in volume, but continued unchecked.

“Her hurt called to me.”  Cole appeared on the other side of Evelyn, crouching over the woman.

“Cole,”  Cullen’s hands were shaking.  “Do you know what is wrong with Evelyn?”

“Yes.”  the Spirit said.  “The boxes are trying to open.  They don’t like being closed.”

“The boxes?”  Cullen was instantly flooded with fear.  He had shown her how to suppress painful memories and emotions so that they didn’t interfere with battle.  He had explained that it was dangerous, and was never meant to be used long term.  It was meant to help a warrior get through that one battle alive.  Afterward, one was supposed to open them one at a time in a safe place where one could reintegrate the memory and feel the emotions and pain naturally.  It required a great deal of focus to maintain the boxes, the more one had, the more Will it took to hold them.  If the boxes could not be maintained, or if someone had one too many devastating experiences, they could all come crashing open.

“How bad is this?”  Cullen asked.  He had seen templars that hadn’t recovered from overuse of this technique.  They’d lost their minds, trapped inside a hell of their own making.

“She had so many boxes. The demon poked at them, trying to tease them open while it was in her head.”  Cole said.  “She is strong.  She will not break.”

 

Evelyn woke from her nightmare, thinking she was still in the Fade.  She had been flooded with memories from the places in her mind where she had hidden them.  All of them were trying to open at once, flooding her with pain and the inevitable feelings of guilt and inadequacy.  She realized that she was in her tent at the same time she realized that she wasn’t alone.  She almost asked who it was that was cradling her so gently in his arms, but then she caught a scent she recognized.  She ought to know who he was, she was currently wearing one of his shirts to sleep in.

“Cullen?”  She asked.  “Are you...is the demon still...?”

“I’m not a demon, Evelyn.  I’m really here.  You’re really here.  We destroyed Adamant, and the Inquisition is undamaged.  But you need to let the boxes go, and it’s time to become whole again.  I’m here, if you need me.”  Cullen’s arms tightened around her, pulling her up against his bare chest.  It seemed too good to be true, but Evelyn couldn’t muster up the energy to hold the boxes closed anymore.

 

Cullen held Evelyn close as she shared many of the troubling memories she had suppressed.  Occasionally Cole spoke, quietly assisting with the reintegration of the memories.  Most of the memories were around the choices Evelyn had made; turning points where she questioned herself. She expressed her guilt because she had chosen to ally with the mages and not the templars.  Now they had to fight the Red Templars, and she wondered about the path she hadn’t walked.

Cullen didn’t remember the Spirit’s departure, but was thankful that Compassion had paid them a visit that night while Evelyn worked hard to make it back to them.  She had finally gotten to the thing that had triggered the meltdown in the first place; the experience she’d just had in the Fade, and the nightmare demon.

“The demon’s voice was so insidious...it just...knew.”  Evelyn said.

“Knew what?”  Cullen prompted after she’d been quiet for a while.

“Everything.  What I had done, what I wanted, the thing that frightens me the most.”  She whispered.

“What did the demon tell you?”

“It told me that I would lose everyone I care about.  It’s happened before when I joined the circle, and then when the circle fell.  Or at least things changed and we were no longer close.”  She buried her face in the space where his neck met his shoulder.  “It told me something I knew already...I don’t get-  I mean, I’m not as close-  ah, being the Herald can be...frustrating.”

“There is someone you’d like to be closer with?”  Cullen’s breath caught.  He wondered if Evelyn had feelings for him that the demon had used against her.  His hand slid over her back, rubbing softly. “The demon got its information from you, Evelyn.  It wouldn’t know the truth of someone else’s feelings.”

“That person has never indicated that they are interested in me that way.”  Evelyn mumbled against his chest.  But she was seriously wrong about his interest in her.  He hadn’t taken the time to put on a shirt, so she was pressed against his bare skin.  He was grateful that she was allowing him to help her.  He loved having her this close.  He wanted to be the one she leaned on when she found it hard to walk on her own.

 

Evelyn was enjoying the warmth of Cullen’s skin, and the sound of his voice in the darkness.  His presence soothed her.  The darkness made everything so much more intimate, but at the same time it provided a shield, where she felt more free under it’s protection.  He had helped her through something horrible, and she felt much more like herself than she had in months.  He was being such a good friend, she just wished that were enough.

“Are you sure?”  Cullen asked.  

“I’m pretty sure.  There have been enough hints.”  Evelyn said very quietly.  She’d had since Haven to think about it.  This conversation was surreal to her.  She wondered if Cullen was a desire demon sent to keep her busy.  If true, the demon had chosen the right weapon to use against her.

“Well, you might want to reconsider that conclusion.  Particularly if that person is an Andrastian, as I am.  If the woman you find yourself falling for has been sent by your Maker to save the world, that would be intimidating for any man. The last time there was a woman this divine on Thedas, she was chosen by the Maker to be his bride.”  Cullen said, a touch of amusement coloring his voice.

“Oh, I never thought of it like that.”  She whispered.  He’d told her before that he truly believed she had been marked by Andraste.  That would explain a great deal about Cullen’s reactions to her flirting with him.  So...he hadn’t disliked it when she’d flirted...quite the opposite.  Her belly fluttered, and her heart pounded.  If only she could really have the one man she wanted the most.

“Of course you didn’t.  You wear your titles because you need to use them, but they’re not really a part of who you are as a person.  You’re still Evelyn, the same mage that came out of Ostwick circle.  And...I have loved you for far longer than I should admit.”  Cullen’s voice was so rich with emotion, the depth of his feelings for her would be impossible to miss.  This was a moment that changed everything.

“If you are a desire demon, I find I am not strong enough to resist the temptation you offer.”  Evelyn’s breath was fast against his skin as she pressed her lips to the pulse at Cullen’s throat.  

   

    Cullen’s heart was soaring.  As if Evelyn’s lips against his skin were a trigger, his body reacted instantly.  He groaned, and when she moved to bless him with tiny kisses along his jaw, he turned into her mouth, so that she kissed his lips instead.  He buried his hands in the loose strands of her hair, the tips of which tickled his skin.  Their lips and teeth and tongues danced and parted, meeting again and again.  He turned a bit, pressing her deeper into the bedroll.  His chest was pressed against her breasts, with only one layer of fabric between them.

    “I want to...”  Cullen began between kisses.  “...be inside you...”

    “That would be...perfect.”   Evelyn slid her hand up to trace his jawline, her thumb moving over his lips to caress the scar there.  “And then you’ll tell me how you got this sexy scar on your mouth.”

    “As you wish.”  Cullen was amused by her request.  He almost told her right then, but then she tipped her hips up, creating space for his pelvis to fit between her thighs.  He stopped talking altogether and put his mouth to a better purpose.

 

Evelyn was flooded with fierce joy of a magnitude that left her breathless.  Cullen loved her!  His lips were travelling over her face, pressing kisses along her throat, moving to the place where her neck met her shoulder.  The deep darkness made her hyper aware of every brush of his stubble, of each breath he exhaled against her skin, of every gasp of pleasure.

They discovered each other, removing barriers and baring more places to explore with slow deliberation.  The sensuous slide of her bare skin against his and the tickle of his chest hair were driving her out of her mind.  Cullen’s kisses were more urgent now, and she felt him latch onto her left nipple, lapping at the peak with firmer and firmer strokes.  She moaned in pleasure, tunneling her fingers into his hair, encouraging him to stay as long as he liked.  Her heart accelerated  as she felt his hands brush against her thighs, urging them further apart.  He pressed hot kisses against her belly, sliding down until he gently parted the lips of her pussy, flicking the tip of her clit with his tongue.  He took his time, using his mouth to bring her close, hovering on the edge of orgasm.  He kept her there, his mouth a precision instrument.

“You tease me, Cullen.”  Evelyn ground out, her hips moving against his mouth, demanding a more immediate solution to her needs.  He pressed one more kiss against her, and then she felt the gentle brush of his cock against the lips of her pussy. “Mmm...I...ah!”

“I want to be inside you when you come for me.”  Cullen’s deep voice was right in her ear.  The shiver he generated was almost enough to make it happen all by itself.  He his hand slid up her thigh, hooking behind her knee, caressing the delicate flesh there.  His other arm held his weight as he moved from where he had been adoring her ear to kiss her lips again.  She felt him slide inside her, it felt amazing to finally be connected with him like this.  He goaned, sinking as far inside her as he could get.   His cock and tongue worked together, penetrating her with a steady and building pace.  

Their gasps filled the small tent, slick bodies moving together to reach one goal.  And then there she was, her cries muffled by his mouth as she finally came apart.  She squeezed him, and then he was there too with a powerful groan he spilled in her.  He stayed inside her for a long moment, holding her to him carefully.  He pressed a gentle kiss to her lips before he lay down beside her.  Cullen’s voice raised in passion may have been the sexiest thing Evelyn had ever heard.

 

    Cullen lay awake, Evelyn curled up against his side, using his shoulder as her pillow as she slept.  She had been through so much, and yet she had still welcomed him to her bed with passion and joy.  He buried his nose in her hair, revelling in the silky feel of it against his skin.  He sighed happily.  Now if only the army outside would go away.  They weren’t actually scheduled to move to Skyhold for another day,  so that they could to tend the wounded and any cleanup that might be necessary.  He already saw some light creeping into the tent.  Soon people would be up and about, and he and Evelyn would have many things to discuss in the light of day.

 

~oOo~

 

    Dorian slapped Iron Bull’s hand away as the Qunari tried to pull him back into the tent for ‘just one more’ kiss.  Things had been better since he’d dropped that last wall between them, and finally told Bull how he felt.  He was ever so grateful to the Commander for giving him the slap in the face he’d needed.  He felt so good, not hiding anymore.  

“Fine, fine...”  Bull said as he gave up on pulling Dorian back inside with him, and joined the mage in the daylight.  Dorian took Iron Bull’s hand, and they walked down the line of tents to find Evie’s.  He chuckled to himself at his lover’s surprise at the public display.  Bull’s hands were huge, and engulfed his own, but they could be gentle.   Bull loved him, and not for his breeding or magical abilities.  He was the only one who’d ever just desired him for being himself.  He stopped right in the middle of the path, turning to look up at the other man.

“What?”  Bull stopped when Dorian did.

“I love you, you giant beastly thing.”  He said before he grabbed the Qunari’s shoulders and kissed him.  Right there, in front of everyone.  Bull’s eye was wide in surprise, but the half smile that crept over his face was pleased.

“I love you too, you fucking ‘Vint.”  Bull answered as they continued to walk down the line of tents.  If anyone noticed their exchange, no one said a word, or even looked at them sideways.  Dorian thought that now he didn’t care if they liked it or not.  He was happy.  Really, actually happy.  It was hard to believe.  He was so lucky to have found Bull.  Even luckier to get to be with him.  They stopped outside Evie’s tent and he touched the flaps that made the door instead of knocking.

“Evie!  You asked me to wake you when Bull and I got up.  You’re missing breakfast!”  Dorian said.  He heard a mumble from the tent.  “What? I can’t hear you.”

“Go away!”  The voice that came out of the tent was definitely not Evie’s, and definitely male.  Dorian’s gaze snapped to Iron Bull’s.  Bull’s eyebrows rose and he grinned.  Dorian smiled too, once he was over his shock.  There were distinct feminine giggles, and lower male rumbles drifting through the tentflap.  He was about to reply when pounding hooves drew his attention.

“Commander Cullen!”  Jim, one of the messengers came riding up on his horse, sliding to halt in front of them.  The young man ducked into Cullen’s tent, coming out looking confused.  He came up to Dorian and Bull, everyone knew they were close with Evelyn, and would probably know something.  “A rift opened on the far end of the camp!  I can’t find Commander Cullen.  Is the Inquisitor in her tent?”

“Oh, she’s in her tent, all right.”  Dorian began, but before he could say anything else, Jim flew into action.

“Inquisitor!  An emergency my Lady!  There’s a rift-”  Jim ducked into the tent, then right back out again.  The poor lad was shaking like a leaf.  “Maker! I am so sorry, Inquisitor!  Commander!”

There was quite a commotion going on inside the tent.  Evelyn charged out through the opening in a blur of red and white.  Cullen was right behind her, his blond hair looking thoroughly mussed.  Evelyn whistled to her horse, who came trotting up to her.  She’d made a habit of always keeping her horse close by for just such occasions.  She grabbed it’s halter, and mounted bareback.  She raised an eyebrow at Jim, who was red faced, and he pointed.

“Meet you there, gentlemen.”  Evelyn said to them before she rode off at full speed.

“I don’t have the luxury of giving you the dressing down you deserve right now.  But do not mistake, the next person who enters the Inquisitor's quarters without permission will wish I had dropped them into the into the Breach naked by the time I am finished with them.  Do you understand?”  Cullen should have looked ridiculous delivering that statement dressed only in a pair of drawstring pants, but he still looked every inch the Commander of the Inquisition as he took Jim’s horse and mounted it.

“Whatever the hell was she wearing?”  Dorian teased.

“That...was my favorite shirt.”  Cullen grinned as he urged the horse into action.

“Did she take the time to put on her smalls, I wonder?”  Dorian asked no one in particular.

“Nope.” The Iron Bull rumbled.

“You barbarian!  You looked!” Dorian accused.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice you ogling Cullen.”  Iron Bull smiled.  “Besides, you love me anyway.”

“I do.”  Dorian sighed.  “We’d better get going.  Don’t want to miss all the fun, do we?”

 

Cullen’s horse was fast, but Evelyn’s was faster on top of her head start.  The rift was visible in the sky, and had opened up on the far side of camp.  With all the troops, support staff, and equipment that were currently present, the camp stretched for most of a mile.

He spotted Evelyn as she rode her horse directly up to the rift, not slowing down.  She rolled from the animal, tumbling to a stop in the soft sand.  She immediately stood and held her left hand in the air.  The mark interacted with the rift, working the magic that would close the green wound in the sky.  The demons reacted to her interference, all leaving their previous targets, heading for the real threat.  She must have anticipated such a reaction, because she stood her ground, watching the shambling demons inch their way toward her, leaving her people alone.

He thought she looked magnificent in that moment, dressed only in his white shirt, her auburn hair unbound and flowing with the power of her magic.  If she could send enough energy into the rift, she would damage and stun the demons, allowing them to be dispensed with much more quickly.  If they got to her before she finished, she would lose all the progress she’d made, and then she would be completely unprotected and surrounded.  That would not happen as long as he was breathing.  He rode faster, drawing a sword from it’s place on the saddle.

 

Evelyn’s eyes were on the demon closest to her.  It was a pride demon.  She hated pride demons.  Aside from the obvious, they were resistant to her favorite flavor of magic, her lightning.  They were extremely hard hitting as well.  She was wearing no armor, and with her mark engaged, she couldn’t set a barrier.  Soldiers were on all sides of her, but they seemed frozen.  She could take two, maybe three hits from the demon before she’d have to pull back, so she had some time to work with.

She heard the pounding of hooves from behind her.  The horse and rider went straight for the Pride demon, hitting it with a sword as it ran by.  They wheeled around, and she saw that it was Cullen coming for another pass.  The demon was almost close enough to hit her.  She held her ground, the Commander managed to strike the demon again before it caught the horse, killing it and sending Cullen rolling into the sand.  The scream from the animal was terrible, but he had succeeded.  He had delayed the demon long enough to allow Evelyn to finish her interaction with the rift, causing a pulse of energy to pass over the area, temporarily stunning the demons.  Evelyn smiled, delighted that her lover had read her intent so clearly.  He was always what she needed.

 

Cullen stood up, took a big two handed sword from a soldier standing nearby, and rallied the troops.  He ordered them to attack the smaller demons, leaving the pride demon for himself.  He approached it slowly, his sword glinting in the desert sun.  

Someone had given Evelyn a staff, and she used it to toss magic at the demon from range.  Cullen chased it as it continued to close on the Herald, attacking it’s back with huge swings of his blade.  When it got close enough, Evelyn dropped a barrier over the both of them, and activated her spirit blade.  She attacked the demon repeatedly, the damage she and Cullen were laying out was massive, but it still wasn’t enough.

“Ready? Aim for the big one in the middle!  Fire!”  Varric’s voice called over the din.  A hail of arrows struck the pride demon, bringing it to it’s knees.  Cullen and Evelyn attacked at the same time, finally destroying the creature.  She raised her hand in the air again, and this time the rift closed for good.  Her eyes found his, her face was flushed and she was smiling as she strode over to where he stood.

“You are always here for me. Thank you for that.”  She stepped even closer.   “Also, that whole alpha male thing.  That’s very hot.”

“Really?  I mean, of course.” Cullen was delighted that she found his battle presence attractive.  He thought she looked sexy when she was fighting as well.  Now that the rift was closed, the soldiers not tending to the wounded were staring at the two of them.  They must have made quite the spectacle.  He didn’t even want to think about the stories this little adventure would spawn.

 

“I love you, Cullen.”  Evelyn stood on her toes, wrapped her arms around Cullen’s neck, and kissed him; right there in front of Varric, the Maker, and the entire Inquisition army. He pulled her tight against his chest, as if he didn’t want to let her go.

“Do I get a kiss too?”  Varric teased.  He strutted down a sand dune followed by Dorian and Iron Bull.  They had arrived just in time to witness the thrilling conclusion.  “I came in at just the right time with that arrow strike, Evie.”

“I’m afraid you’ll have to ask Cullen directly if you want to kiss him, Varric.  But I’m not handing them out to just anyone.”  Evelyn whistled, and her horse appeared as if by magic.  She mounted and looked down at Cullen.  She couldn’t help but smile every time she looked at him.  She held out her hand, inviting him to jump up behind her. “Want a ride back to your tent, Handsome? Wow, you’re hair really is curly isn’t it?”

“I may do something to it...” Cullen admitted after he settled himself behind her.  He sounded a bit self conscious about the topic, but she loved his hair, however he wanted to wear it.  She nudged her horse into motion, ignoring everyone else who attempted to get her attention.

“I like it either way.  You know, dressed like that, on the back of my horse as I ride triumphant in battle, you kind of look like a prize I won.  You know, for being the best mage this side of the Fade.”  Evelyn teased.  

“You’re the one wearing my shirt.  Perhaps you’re my prize.” Cullen’s lips brushed the shell of her ear as he spoke.  Her back arched in response.  He flicked her ear with his tongue, sending shivers down her spine as well.  Her nipples peaked instantly.

“Ahhaa...We’ll have to talk about that later, funny story.  But it’s my horse, and I’m driving, so I get to be the one who-”  Evelyn gasped as Cullen slid a bit closer behind her, resting his hands on her waist.  The slow roll of the horse’s gait had his hips grinding against her ass.  It wasn’t long before Cullen’s fully hard cock was a hot and persistent distraction. “Oh, my.”

“We have a great many things to discuss.  I have some confessions of my own to make.” Cullen said.

“Sounds naughty.” Evelyn’s tone dropped a register.

“Very naughty.”  Cullen whispered against her ear.  The mage shivered again.  She would never get tired of his voice.

“We’re not moving out for at least another day, right?” Evelyn spotted their tents and adjusted their direction.

“At least.” Cullen said.  This time he bit her earlobe.

“Excellent.” Evelyn said in a devious tone of voice.  She stopped the horse just outside where they had camped.  There were people everywhere.  “How do we get off the horse and into the tent with our dignity intact?  Assuming we have any left, that is.”  

    “Heads held high, hands held low.”  Cullen deadpanned.

  
~oOo~


	6. Dawn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You’re a quandary. Did you know? You’re this sweet, adorable Cullen, that makes me want to hug you close. Then there is this darker Cullen, the alpha male, like when you’re with your men, or in battle, that urges me to run...and have you chase me...”  
>  “You do? That’s...interesting.” Cullen rubbed the back of his neck to cover his surprise. She never ceased to amaze him. He hoped she wasn’t just teasing, because the thought of chasing Evelyn, and having his wicked way with her was the stuff of his darkest fantasies. He deliberately dropped his voice when he spoke next. “And what about when I catch you?”  
>  “Well, it’s been awhile since I’ve been ravished.” Evelyn reached under the table and casually brushed her hand over Cullen’s lap. She grinned wickedly as she tested his excitement, finding that she’d gotten his attention. “And if that isn’t enough motivation, I may be partially responsible for the Desk Incident.”  
>  “That was YOU?” Cullen growled, slowly taking to his feet. Someone had shoved a wedge under the leg of his desk, causing it to be ever so slightly unstable. It had been maddening until he’d finally found it.

~oOo~

“Cullen?” Evelyn whispered as soon as they had made the mad dash from the back of her horse to the partial darkness of her tent.  
“Yes?” He laughed as he caught his breath, bare chest heaving. She found that quite distracting. She came closer, her fingers reaching out to slide over his pectorals.  
“We should talk...” The mage found herself fascinated by the sheer breadth of his chest. All those years of military training had yielded beautiful results. She brushed his nipples with her fingertips, a wicked smile ghosted over her lips as he shivered.  
“Yes...I don’t want to hide even the smallest thing from you...” Cullen’s mouth hovered over hers. She could feel his warm breath against her lips. “I want to know everything about you, Evelyn. All your secrets.”  
“Honesty is good.” She nodded, even as she swayed closer, sliding her arms around his waist. “I support that idea very much...but...right now...”  
“Right now?” The former templar’s eyebrow raised in question as his hand skimmed over her cheek, sliding into her hair. His large hands moved with such gentleness, almost as if he were afraid she would break, or disappear if he tried to hold her too tightly.  
“Can we maybe just...?” She allowed the words to hang between them, heavy with promise.  
“Just? What would you rather have me do, my love? Right...now?” Cullen used his Commander voice to make the demand. He was going to make her say it out loud, her thighs squeezed together in response.  
“Kiss me.” Evelyn ordered. Cullen groaned and closed the final distance between them. He had always been good at following orders.  
They spent the rest of that day inside her tent. They made love until they fell exhausted onto Evelyn’s bedroll. She took a deep breath and was grateful for the darkness as she began the conversation that could make or break everything.  
“Now might be a good time to talk about ...Things...” She blushed as she felt Cullen’s strong arm squeeze her close. Her cheeks were so warm, he could probably feel the heat against his bare skin. “I’ll start. I often have difficulty sleeping since Conclave. When I borrowed one of your shirts that night after Haven fell, I slept so well, that...I kept it. But it stopped smelling like you, so I’ve been borrowing your shirts to sleep in. Your scent is...comforting to me. I’m the reason that your shirts take so long in the laundry.” She buried her heated face in his neck as she waited for his response.   
“I know.” Cullen’s voice rumbled up through his chest. “I don’t mind. I like it, really. But I discovered it that night after you killed your first dragon. Things...happened that you forgot.”  
“Ah, last night Cole helped me recover that particular incident.” Evelyn said. The Spirit had whispered to her that the loss of that memory shouldn’t have happened. She was so embarrassed! “I got drunk, kissed you, and then didn’t even do you the courtesy of remembering it. That made things more difficult than they needed to be. I’m sorry about that...”  
“That did make things...hard.” Cullen’s hand stroked up and down her bare arm, leaving tingles in his wake. “My turn then. I...was...am...your Soldier from the Masque. After you kissed me in your rooms, I reasoned that if you and I could get out of our roles, and just be people, we might...I didn’t think, I mean, I hoped that we might...but that was not the reason I attended. And after, I wanted to tell you who I was more than I wanted my next breath. I...hope you’re not upset.”  
Evelyn thought about his confession for a moment. She had suspected that Cullen was her Soldier the moment they’d kissed in her tent. No one had ever kissed her like that. She could feel betrayed, but she didn’t want to allow anything to cause a rift between herself and Cullen, Dorian, and whomever else had helped with the plan. Evelyn knew Cullen would never have gone to the party on his own. The shenanigans had given her her heart’s desire. Cullen hadn’t been angry that she’d basically stolen his clothes. For months. He’d even allowed it to continue after he’d found out about it. He could have revealed her creepiness to anyone who would listen, but he’d kept her secret instead. So, she had a choice. She was so in love with Cullen, she ached with it, and she was quite happy with the way things had turned out. She had lost people she loved due to circumstances outside her control...this situation was different. She could choose how to react now.   
“I remember that you offered to tell me right then. I was tempted...but I was afraid of what it might mean for the Inquisition. So, I’m not upset. After all, I was there to try to get you out of my system. I didn’t want to be distracted while I tried to defeat Corypheus. And you were so very distracting. I spent so much time running away from how I felt about you. I hate that I did that to both of us. I might have suspected it was you at the masque because you didn’t do anything to hide your voice, but I dismissed it for wishful thinking.”  
“Then...you and I are...all right?” Cullen’s voice was unmistakably nervous.  
“Better than all right.” Evelyn smiled at him. Cullen’s scar pulled his lips slightly off kilter, making the relieved smile he gifted her with breach level dangerous. 

“No more questions?” Cullen asked. He was beyond relieved. That conversation could have ended everything before it had truly begun. He never wanted to keep anything from Evelyn again, so he wanted to make sure she had all her questions answered.  
“Two more, actually. How did you learn to dance the Antivan Tango? I’m sure they didn’t go over that in the Chantry. And at the Winter Palace you were not as at ease dancing with me.” She rested her head on his shoulder, sliding her hand over the warrior’s abdomen, teasing the dips and ridges with the tip of her finger. His belly tightened, she was moving steadily downward.  
“Dorian gave me dancing lessons. He knew I had tried to connect with you, but had trouble...communicating. He promised me I could seduce you with a dance.” Cullen’s fingertips traced her spine. The lessons had required many hours in the Tevinter’s company that he’d never anticipated. Dorian had been surprisingly easy to talk to. They’d become friends, and Cullen was glad of it. “It worked, didn’t it?”  
“That it did...” Evelyn’s smile was wicked as she placed a teasing kiss on his flawed lip. He loved how she seemed unable to stop touching him. He hoped it was a trend that would continue. He was quite spent from their prior activities, but if she kept touching him, he’d want to bury himself inside her again, regardless. Some day he might have enough of her, but he doubted it. “Now tell me how you got your scar.” She prompted him.  
“Very well,” Cullen began. He’d seen people staring at his lip and become a bit self conscious. Why she seemed fascinated with the imperfection was beyond him. “I had booked passage on a ship sailing to Kirkwall. A storm hit us and I assisted with the sails. A wave washed over the deck and I lost my footing. I got hit in the face with the railing. That split my lip and left me with the scar you seem to enjoy so much.”  
“I do. It’s very sexy...and that’s not the only thing I enjoy about you, my Beloved.” Evelyn said. Cullen groaned as her hands continued down below his waist. He felt his cock stirring in anticipation of her touch. He sighed happily; she was using her magic to make her hand warmer. He’d enjoyed that very much at the masque. “I wasn’t kidding when I said you have the most beautiful penis I’ve ever seen.”

~oOo~

By the time they had returned to Skyhold from Adamant, the entire Inquisition had heard about Evelyn and Cullen’s half naked battle with rift demons. They had been caught in a dramatic way, and it would take a while for the fervor to die down. Varric had invited the two of them to meet him for drinks at the Herald’s Rest. He’d argued that they had to be seen as a couple in public sooner or later, and sooner would be better for a number of reasons. They agreed, and not quite a week after they returned, the Herald of Andraste and the Commander of the Inquisition Forces strolled into the tavern holding hands.  
Varric was already there, and was sitting with Iron Bull and Dorian at their usual spot. “Over here, Curly. We’ve got a spot for the two of you.” the dwarf called out as he spotted them by the door. All eyes moved to the couple in open curiosity. Varric had to admire the way the two of them endured the scrutiny. They gracefully crossed the room and settled into their seats with only the lightest of blushes to betray that they felt the weight of the stares.  
“Everyone.” Evelyn smiled at them all. Cullen said nothing, just nodded to the other men before turning to scan the room. He was blushing and glowering at the same time.   
“How are things?” Dorian smirked. He had arranged himself so that Iron Bull somehow seemed like a decadent throne that the Tevinter leaned against while holding court.   
“Things are lovely, Dorian.” Evelyn answered. “And things with you are well?”  
“The sex is great, if that’s what you’re asking.” Iron Bull finished off his drink, slammed the mug into the table, and waved over a serving woman all in a smooth motion with one hand. The other was wrapped deceptively casually around the shoulders of his lover.   
Dorian gasped in mock outrage, and began berating Bull with colorful insults in his native tongue. The rest of the group laughed, had several more drinks, and the tavern got back to normal for a while.  
Evelyn had indulged enough that the endless stares of everyone at Skyhold no longer bothered her. The others had kept up, and their party had gotten louder as the evening wore on. Eventually, Sera glared down at them from the second level and yelled some words at them. She stomped back into her crowded room and slammed the door.  
“Did she just yell at us like we were naughty children? Sera?” Cullen laughed.   
“I think she did...” Varric grinned. “I didn’t understand anything she said.”  
“I never understand anything that comes out of her mouth.” Dorian added. “I’d be terrified if anything she ever said started making sense.”  
“Ugh.” Evelyn groaned. “She won’t forget this...she’ll probably make all the legs on my bed uneven, or something worse.”  
“Why your bed?” Cullen asked, then immediately wished he hadn’t when he heard Bull snort in laughter.  
“Because, my Beloved, taking out my bed would hit me where it would drive me crazy the most.” Evelyn smiled, tilting her head. Cullen blushed as the others laughed good naturedly. Evelyn cupped his jaw, reveling in the feel of his stubble against her palm. “You’re a quandary. Did you know? You’re this sweet, adorable Cullen, that makes me want to hug you close. Then there is this darker Cullen, the alpha male, like when you’re with your men, or in battle, that urges me to run...and have you chase me...”  
“You do? That’s...interesting.” Cullen rubbed the back of his neck to cover his surprise. She never ceased to amaze him. He hoped she wasn’t just teasing, because the thought of chasing Evelyn, and having his wicked way with her was the stuff of his darkest fantasies. He deliberately dropped his voice when he spoke next. “And what about when I catch you?”  
“Well, it’s been awhile since I’ve been ravished.” Evelyn reached under the table and casually brushed her hand over Cullen’s lap. She grinned wickedly as she tested his excitement, finding that she’d gotten his attention. “And if that isn’t enough motivation, I may be partially responsible for the Desk Incident.”  
“That was YOU?” Cullen growled, slowly taking to his feet. Someone had shoved a wedge under the leg of his desk, causing it to be ever so slightly unstable. It had been maddening until he’d finally found it. “It was you and Sera, wasn’t it?”  
“That prank drove you mad for weeks! I would sit across from you in your office discussing business, and your desk would wiggle...I tried so hard not to laugh!” Evelyn teased as she stepped closer to the stairs to the upper levels of the tavern. She would need a head start if she wanted the chase to last.   
“Oh, I will make you pay for that!” Cullen stepped purposefully around all obstacles on his way to her, his face thunderous. He hadn’t mentioned that he’d practically flipped his monstrosity of a desk over in frustration before he’d discovered the hidden chunk of wood that had been tormenting him.   
“Maker, I hope so!” Evelyn tossed over her shoulder as she ran up the stairs. She could hear Cullen’s boots behind her as she moved quickly around one flight of stairs and began climbing the next one. The cheers and shouts of encouragement from the few folks left in the tavern chased her as she hurried through the door on the top floor. She led him around, staying just ahead of him until he caught her, just as she was slipping through the door to escape from his office towards the horse barn.  
“For a mage, you are very quick...you led me on a merry chase.” He held both of her hands in one of his large rough ones as he reached for something on the bookshelf. He pulled a book at random and opened it, holding it for her to see. “Look at the page number. Do not tell it to me yet.”  
“What?” She did as he asked, but was confused as to his reasoning.   
“You started this game, Evelyn. I’ve caught you, and now you must bend to my desires.” He scooped her up over his shoulder, startling a squeal from the Inquisitor. He smacked her upturned ass to get her attention. “The safe word, my love, is...‘nug’.”  
“Oh...Oh!” Suddenly she realized that her Commander was more of an alpha male than she’d thought. Her body warmed, priming for him. She found herself unable to stop wiggling. “Yes, please.”  
Cullen kept his hand on his lover’s firm ass as he carried her from his office. She did not ask where he was taking her, and he did not tell her. He just nodded to the stunned sentries as they passed by on the way to the prison. Evelyn smiled and winked at a pair of guards who couldn’t stop staring at the uncharacteristic behavior of their Commander. There were no actual prisoners currently, and the inner guard quickly disappeared when he saw the look on the Commander’s face.   
Cullen found a cell with manacles attached to the walls. He put Evelyn’s feet back on the floor, but quickly had her secured to the wall. She could probably escape if she really wanted to, but he hoped she would choose to stay and play. He stepped out of the cell and closed the door between them.   
“I will return shortly. Do not move. Do not speak. Nod if you understand and agree.” Cullen waited for Evelyn to nod, then stepped away from the door. He actually had no plans to go anywhere, but he needed a moment to assess his resources, and prepare mentally for the scenario he wanted to play out with her. He waited five minutes, then returned to the cell. He stood outside the door and allowed his gaze to travel over his ‘prisoner’ lingering in a way he had never allowed himself before.  
“You’ve been caught infiltrating my fortress. Why are you here? Who are you?” Cullen moved to the desk the guard usually occupied. He picked up several small things which he stored in his pocket. Smirking, he found a length of rope there, idly playing with it while he returned to the cell door. “You have nothing to say?”  
Evelyn’s heart was pounding in her chest. She didn’t know what Cullen had in mind, but she couldn’t wait to find out. He’d left the rope dangling from the barred door like a wicked promise. He opened the door to the cell when she shook her head. He came inside, crowding her space as he questioned her again. No matter what excuse she offered, he told her that he didn’t believe her. The Commander reached over his shoulders and removed his mantle, draping it over something out of Evelyn’s line of sight. The look on his face was severe, the tone of his voice sending shivers down her spine. He took off his armor, each piece accompanied by another question regarding her reason for infiltration of his keep.   
“I wouldn’t want to soil my clothes as I question you, Spy.” Cullen tugged the laces of his shirt, revealing sexy tanned skin at his throat. He pulled the garment over his head, revealing first his rippled abdomen, then his hard chest and muscled arms. “I am willing to go to extreme measures to get the truth from you.”   
“I...did sneak in to spy on you.” Evelyn admitted, squirming in her bonds. She was pleasantly surprised at how effective her lover was at this game. She was dripping with desire for him, and he hadn’t even touched her yet!   
“I need to search you, Spy.” Cullen’s hands were rough as he ran them over her body, taking his time palming her breasts and squeezing her ass along the way. Finding nothing, he reached down to his boot and pulled out a knife. He tapped the blade against the center of his lower lip as he spoke. “I see that you are clever. You’ve hidden it.”  
Cullen’s gaze drifted over the room, landing on his sash. He pulled it from the pile of his clothing with one hand, making sure Evelyn saw the fabric, and giving her time to guess his intent. He tied the sash over her eyes, creating a blindfold. He bit her ear, and worked his way down the neckline of Evelyn’s mage robe. He allowed her to feel the steel of the dagger as slid the blade under the fabric. He cut several inches into the garment, revealing the dark shadow of her cleavage. He smirked as he tucked the knife into his belt, grabbed the edges of the fabric and ripped it apart. Evelyn’s startled gasp stoked Cullen’s excitement. He watched her breasts strain against her undergarments as her breathing came faster.  
“I will not give you what you want!” She ground out as her ‘jailor’ used the knife to cut through the thicker waist of her robe, and his hands to rip the garment to the hem, leaving it dangling uselessly from her shoulders and arms like a lewd green cape.   
“I think you will. Tell me who you work for, Spy.” Cullen reached for his belt and began to work the buckle. She followed the unmistakable sound as his hands worked. He pulled his belt from the loops and Evelyn swallowed hard, but she held her mouth firmly closed. He draped the belt over her shoulders, stepped up to her and thoroughly explored her breasts. He did not remove her bra, just pulled each breast from the cup, freeing them to his view. The rosy peaks jumped to attention with the merest brush of his hands against her. He pinched her nipples, holding them tightly as he watched her squirm with delight. Cullen took the belt from where he’d stored it around her shoulders, and used the tip to tease Evelyn’s nipples. He spanked them lightly with the tip, then harder. He applied improvised clamps to her erect nipples, flicking each nipple with his tongue before he attached the little clips. He continued to torment her breasts and nipples until she whispered to him she was from the Marches. “Oh, yes. You will tell me everything. Are you carrying information to my enemies now?”  
“No! I got caught before I could find anything.” Evelyn shook her head, her breasts heavy and tingling. She challenged him with her tone, denying that she was hiding anything. He moved behind her, pulling her back against the hard planes of his body. He gripped her smalls with both hands and ripped them away, startling a gasp from her. He delved into her pussy, only grazing her clit as he slid one finger inside her, probing.   
“I am disappointed that you are not more forthcoming, my little spy. Where could you be hiding it?” Cullen whispered, his lips brushing the shell of her ear as he spoke, sending a shiver down her spine.   
“Ah! I don’t have what you want!” She protested. Her body arched as he slipped a second finger deep inside Evelyn. He was stretching her, testing her, and she was reveling in it. His fingers lubricated from her slick fluids, he slowly worked three fingers inside her as he continued the interrogation.  
“I know this treatment seems harsh, but I can be kind as well. I can make it worth your while to tell me the nature of the information you took.” Cullen’s voice dropped as he spoke to her, a deep rumble that had her pussy clenching around his invading fingers. “I’ll allow you to orgasm if you tell me everything.”  
Evelyn whimpered as Cullen dropped to one knee before her and began pressing his mouth against her parted thighs. He was an expert at using his mouth on her. She wanted to hold out, but when he flicked her clit with little tiny brushes, all the while working the fourth finger into her tight pussy, she knew she wouldn’t for long.   
Cullen didn’t think he would be able to fit any more of his hand inside Evelyn at this time, but looked forward to the opportunity to try to fist her in the future. Watching his large fingers disappear inside her, feeling her tight muscles clench around him, had his cock weeping at a significant rate. A patch of wetness had appeared on his pants. He shouldn’t have been surprised, he’d been aching and hard since the chase had begun. The time was rapidly approaching where his cock could not longer be ignored.  
Evelyn’s voice rose as her peak neared. Cullen backed off, grinning to himself as she growled at him in frustration. His gaze never left her blindfolded face as he began pleasuring her again, watching her carefully. The Commander never allowed his ‘prisoner’ to orgasm, just kept her close, so close to the peak that she finally screamed out the page number that he’d told her to keep away from him. When she did, Cullen pulled away from her completely, leaving her gasping and aching. Cullen released her hands from the manacles, and her knees did not support her. She sunk to her knees at his feet.   
“Now that you’ve confessed to working with my enemy, I’m afraid I can’t let you go.” Cullen’s strong hands pressed against her shoulders when she tried to rise. He grabbed her hands, tying them together behind her with the bit of rope. “I’m going to have my wicked way with you, instead.”   
Cullen reached for one of his vambraces and used it to wedge Evelyn’s thighs apart. He plucked the little clips on her nipples and watched her shiver in anticipation. He opened his fastenings, and his cock practically burst free from his pants. He was beyond eager for her as he gripped the back of her head and touched the tip of his cock against her lips. Her pink tongue darted out, tasting him. He pressed forward, watching her red lips part over his cock, her tongue flicking the tip.   
This was the first he’d allowed her to touch him. She was so beautiful, her body fully aroused and her skin flushed pink. Her thighs were taut over the piece of his armor that he’d used to keep her legs apart. As he watched, he saw her fluids actually drip onto the metal. He groaned, his head tipping back as she sucked his cock like her life depended on it.   
“Stop.” He ordered with less authority than he’d liked. She didn’t, so he tried again. Regaining the control he’d briefly lost, Cullen lifted her, carrying her out of the cell, and arranging her over the desk at the guard station. With her hands still behind her, he urged her head and shoulders down against the desk, leaving her with her ass in the air.   
“Maker’s Breath!” Evelyn groaned. She felt as if he would kill her if he didn’t fuck her soon. And then he was there, his beautiful cock nudging at her opening, then sliding inside her like they were made to fit. She sighed in delight at the feel of his rough hands gripping her ass. He rolled his hips, starting slowly, then pounding away at her, driving deep. She wanted to watch her warrior’s face as he rutted in her, his power and pleasure arousing all on it’s own. Instead she had the feel of him inside her, that glorious slide of his hard flesh and her soft places. She focused on his voice, the pleasure, power, the unleashing of control when he lost himself inside her. And then she was coming apart, her body squeezing and gushing around him at the same time.  
“Yes! Evelyn...Ahh...” Cullen’s grip was tight enough to bruise as he came, driving into his lover like he’d never allowed himself to do before. For a moment, he wondered if he’d gone too far. He had well and truly allowed himself to be free with her, to touch her like he had in his darkest fantasies. But Evelyn gasped as she squeezed his cock that was still buried in her. He groaned inwardly, Maker, she was still coming! He reached for her clit, and worked them both slowly, fucking her in a slow glide, keeping her orgasming until he was able to join her again. “Oh, yes! You’re amazing.”  
“So...yeah...that was epic, Handsome. I can’t even begin to imagine what you could do to me if you have time to prepare beforehand.” The mage used her magic to rid herself of the rope, flipping over onto her back, gasping.   
“I’m sure I can come up with something.” Cullen grinned at her, palming her breasts before freeing her purpling nipples and soothing them with kisses. Evelyn shivered in delight.   
“That was perfect, Cullen.” his lover whispered in his ear as he held her close. She was perfect. Sometimes the Maker was kind, and Cullen whispered a prayer of thanks as he buried his face in her hair.  
The next morning Evelyn didn’t see the young man that found the two of them asleep and naked under blankets in the open prison cell, ruined clothes strewn everywhere. But she did wake when she heard Cullen’s voice, as he ordered the young man to guard the door from the outside, and not let anyone else in if he valued his life.  
“This is your last chance, Jim!” Cullen roared.

~oOo~

Cullen stood over the war table, feeling confident. He, Leliana, and Josephine were using all their resources to delay Corypheus in his attempt to reach an Elvish temple in the Arbor Wilds. As always, it was because Evelyn had seen the larger view and brought them all around to a common purpose.   
“Is that everything?” Evelyn smiled at them all. Everything that could have been done, had been. It was now time to face their enemy. After no one had anything else to add, Leliana and Josephine left the room. Cullen shut the door and leaned against it.  
“We are going to win, Evelyn. I believe in the Maker, I believe in the Inquisition. But most of all, I believe in you.” He had to believe, because anything else would be...unthinkable.  
“Commander, I want you to know that you have a place here when this is all over. I’d like you to work with me to build a lasting peace between mages and templars. And who better than an ex Circle Mage and a former Knight Commander to make that happen?” Evelyn gripped Cullen’s breastplate and pressed herself against it.  
“That sounds like a long term assignment, Inquisitor. Are you sure you want to keep me around for such a time?” Cullen walked her backwards until her legs hit the War Table, lifting her ass to the surface and settling between her thighs.  
“I can see why you’d want some guarantees regarding the position I have in mind, Commander. I’d like very much if you’d do me the pleasure of becoming my husband.” Evelyn bit her lip as she waited for his response. His amber gaze ran over her face, then his mouth curved up on one corner.  
“I would be honored to accept, my love.” Cullen kissed her with urgency. Evelyn’s heart soared with his answer, purring in delight while she went to work at the armor of her lover. Every strap and buckle, each thunk of the armor hitting the floor, ratcheted her desire for him higher. His hands worked the fastenings of Evelyn’s blouse, slipping it over her shoulders. The fabric hit the surface of the table, sending markers scattering in every direction. Evelyn pushed against the center of Cullen’s chest with a smile. There was a wicked gleam in his eye as he stepped back. He quickly pulled off the rest of his clothes as he watched her do the same. She did enjoy the fantastic view, and got an idea.  
“Up on the table, Handsome.” Evelyn teased. “I’ve been inspired.”   
“As you wish.” the warrior laughed as he climbed onto the war table, settling on his back in the center. As he rested back against the wooden table, his beautiful cock stood straight into the air like a sun dial.   
She stood over him, feet on either side of his hips as she caressed her breasts, teasing her pink nipples while he watched her with an intensity she’d rarely seen on him outside of battle. His amber eyes seemed to glow as he looked up at her. He deliberately folded his sculpted arms behind his head, he seemed to be enjoying the show. After exploring her belly and thighs, Evelyn watched Cullen’s face as she parted the lips of her pussy and found her clit with the tips of her fingers. She rubbed it gently, slowly, feeling her already wet pussy grow even more ready.   
His breathing visibly increased as she slipped one finger inside. Cullen’s mouth opened silently as he watched the digit disappear inside her. She followed it with two fingers, mimicking what she wanted to do with his cock. He groaned when she removed them, demonstrating how slick she was. But still he waited, allowing her to take control.  
Evelyn slowly lowered herself over Cullen’s weeping cock. He fit inside her perfectly, her knees coming to rest on the table. She looked at his face; how she loved his expression when they found pleasure in each other. She settled herself over his cock, rolling her hips. That move earned her a hiss from the former templar, his hands coming to grip her hips firmly. She couldn’t help teasing him. “Like that, do you?”  
“I like that very much.” Cullen flexed his abdominal muscles, causing his cock to jump inside Evelyn. She gasped, and he did it again. “Do you like that?”  
“Mmm....maybe try it a...” Evelyn gasped three times as she felt the hard cock inside her jump, flexing against something fantastic as she nearly came. “I like it!” Cullen’s distraction did not seem to deter the mage from her goal to drive him out of his mind. She squeezed him rhythmically with her inner muscles, watching his face for his reaction.   
Cullen ran one hand over Evelyn’s hip, drawing a gasp from her as he covered her breast with his entire hand. He slid the roughness of his palm over the erect tip of her nipple, watching for the pleasure he knew would cross her face at his action. She’d told him before that she very much enjoyed the feel of his soldier’s hands against her skin, particularly her breasts. She moved faster, one of her hands holding his palm to breast, encouraging him to knead her more firmly, to pinch and flick her nipple. Her other hand found her clit again and began working it in rhythm with her thrusts.   
The hand that covered Evelyn’s breast started to tingle. He felt the power of her electricity bring every nerve alive at once. She had given him a taste of this back in Haven, when she’d brushed his wrist and nearly made him spill in his pants. Maker! If she’d killed him with pleasure in that moment, Cullen wouldn’t have been surprised. She slowly raised the intensity, waves of the magic and her hips working together to wring from him a huge shout when he finally emptied himself into her. Her body tensed as she swirled her hips around several times, reaching her peak with a feminine growl.  
“That was very nice.” Cullen gasped, cradling Evelyn against his body. He knew that statement wasn’t adequate, but in his haze of pleasure, he felt lucky he’d been able to speak at all.  
“‘Very nice,’ he says.” Evelyn laughed as she adorned Cullen’s throat with tiny kisses between words. “You have a gift for understatement, my Beloved.”  
“I might.” He conceded, earning another amused smile from her. He looked into her green eyes and suddenly the fear welled up in him and he could no longer hide it from her. “I know why you became a Knight Enchanter.”  
“And why do you think that is?” Evelyn settled next to him on the table, her tone a mix of curiosity and concern. He rolled so that he was on his side, facing her.   
“I think you want to protect everyone, and so you put yourself at the front of the battle. I favor that position as well, so I understand.” He said, his amber eyes serious. “But there is a difference between leading from the front and taking unnecessary risks. I know you would die to save us all if it is required. If that should happen, I regret nothing. Please, I beg you...keep in mind that it is just as noble to live for the people. And I require it.”  
Evelyn closed her eyes for a moment. When she reopened them, they were glistening with tears. “I will do what I must to stop Corypheus. I promise, I will do everything in my power to return to you.” And when she leaned in and pressed her lips against his, sealing her promise, Cullen do nothing but believe her. Believe in her, and pray.

~oOo~

When she entered the Elvish Temple, Evelyn chose to go through the trials and walk the path to honor the ancient goddess, Mythal. She saw no reason not to just go through the steps and be considerate of those who had worshipped there. She chose to work with the Ancient Elves, and their leader, Aballas, to fight off Corypheus's army.  
The Inquisitor used the rune that Dagna had created to destroy Samson’s armor. His defeat was inevitable after that. In addition, she chose to honor her promise to Cullen to not take unnecessary risks. She allowed Morrigan to drink from the Well of Sorrows. The Witch of the Wilds wanted to do it, and Evelyn wanted to return to Cullen more than anything she might find in that magic mist. Morrigan opened the mirror, and Evelyn followed her team back to Skyhold, and Cullen’s waiting arms.

~oOo~

Evelyn was speaking to her advisors in the war room, discussing Corypheus’ next move after his defeat at Mythal’s temple when the sky split open. They all stared at the green wound in the sky for some time before first Josephine, then Leliana, and finally Cullen, turned to gaze at Evelyn with dread.  
“We have no forces to send with you. We must wait for them to return from the Arbor Wilds.” Cullen’s stomach was in knots. He prayed to the Maker that Evelyn would wait, but he knew that she could not.   
“He knows that, Cullen.” Evelyn’s shoulders straightened and her mouth firmed up. “This can’t wait. I’ll take Dorian, Iron Bull and Varric. We’ll have to leave right now.”  
Josephine and Leliana nodded and hurried off to make arrangements. Cullen caught Evelyn in his arms, whispering of his love for her before hurrying off to make arrangements of his own. Then she was alone in the war room. She looked at the table, then up at the rift. Her mark pulsed in time with the rift. The pain was staggering. She only just managed to suppress a scream. She took a breath, her face a determined mask.   
“I’m coming, you bastard.” She promised her enemy. “And one of us isn’t coming back.”  
~oOo~

Cullen waited. He was standing on the battlements of Skyhold, watching the rift. He wasn’t the only one. Every single person who wasn’t busy doing something critical was watching the rift pulse and shiver across the sky. Dragons fought a deadly arial battle before crashing to the ground with a rumble that could be felt miles away. Green magic light flashed up from the ground in bursts, then one long pulse followed by a larger, final looking explosion. The rift was sealed! All of Skyhold erupted in cheers and applause. But successfully closing the rift did not mean that Evelyn was safe. So still he waited.  
It took some time before the horn announcing the safe return of the Inquisitor was sounded. No one missed that Cullen didn’t step away from his vigil until that particular horn rang out. He moved to stand in his customary spot with Leliana and Josephine, ready to welcome the Herald of Andraste home. She strode in confidently, smiling and accepting the adulation of the people. She looked up, spotted him, and smiled. His heart stuttered.   
She climbed the steps, running by the time she got to him. Evelyn launched herself into his arms, he swung her around several times before setting her on her feet.   
“I worried for you.” Cullen admitted.   
“Are you kidding? I had to come back. I’ve got the best reason to live.” Evelyn pressed her mouth to his, and only then did Cullen feel as if they had been victorious.

~oOo~

Evelyn settled the red and black daisy pin on Cullen’s collar. He wore the black velvet outfit he’d worn to the masque. She still loved the way he filled it out. She wore a simple red sheath dress with touches of black embroidery at the neck and hem. The gold button she had kept as a token of her encounter with Cullen the Soldier resided on a long gold chain tucked between her breasts.  
“Did you see the latest edition of Skyhold’s Top 10 list?” Cullen looked down at Evelyn. Sometimes he had a hard time believing it was all over. That they had survived and won the day. That she was about to be his wife seemed almost too good to be true.  
“Top 10 best mage robe designs for autumn?” Evelyn smiled at him.  
“No. The 10 worst places to get ‘friendly’ in Skyhold.” Cullen had been a bit surprised that he and Evelyn had been ‘friendly’ in all those places. He’d found nothing strange about them. Naughty, perhaps...  
“I did see that one. Apparently, it should actually read, ‘you can bee seen/heard in these places.’ I suspect that was for our benefit.” Evelyn winked suggestively.   
“Oh. Oh!” Cullen’s eyebrows rose in surprise, then he smiled wickedly at her.  
“Have you heard that it’s all the rage now in Orlais for men to take off their top button and wear their lover’s stickpin instead?” Evelyn’s eyes were sparkling with amusement.  
“All the rage, hm?” Cullen smirked. “Someone must have seen me leave with it like this.”  
“My guess is that people were watching for you. We made quite the impression.” She said. “And the Antivan Tango has become acceptable, in honor of our love affair of course, but only after midnight.”  
“How did you arrange all this anyway? You cleared the Forbidden Oasis for this.” Cullen was still amazed at his luck. He was going to marry the woman of his dreams, in a place that was truly magical.  
“I didn’t do this. This is a gift from your soldiers. This was all their idea. Knight-Captain Rylen suggested that you might enjoy something more private than the fiasco of a political wedding that will happen in a few months. I agreed completely. So this is for us; just you, me, and the new Divine. A moment we can share before the Maker and Andraste, and no one else.” Evelyn took his hand and led him over to where Leliana was waiting.  
“Perfect.” Cullen whispered.

 

~oOo~

“So Rylen has the soldiers situated so that they are close if needed, but not close enough to eavesdrop. The bed is set up in the temple ruin, right there by the waterfall, and the picnic basket is next to the bed....” Dorian was standing at the south end of the Oasis, near the camping spot, gazing out over the gorgeous scenery.  
“The Divine is gone now,” the Iron Bull put his arms around his lover. Dorian had been fussing for weeks trying to get everything perfect for Evelyn and Cullen’s private wedding. “So the wedding is over. I think they can handle the next part on their own, don’t you?”  
The Tevinter sighed, Bull was right. He had done all he could to facilitate his friends’ happiness, there was nothing else to be done. He looked at the Qunari, his gaze drifting over his expressive face. Dorian was wasting time worrying, that he could be spending in those strong arms. He was about to say something when a sound echoed through the valleys of the Oasis, Evelyn’s magically enhanced voice calling something...  
“Cullen, you barbarian! Don’t you dare stop!”

~oOo~

The End.

Thank you for reading.


End file.
